1
00:00:03,136 --> 00:00:05,730
He sprang to his sleigh
To his team gave a whistle
2
00:00:05,905 --> 00:00:08,897
And away they all flew
Like the down of a thistle
3
00:00:09,075 --> 00:00:12,169
But I heard him exclaim
Ere he drove out of sight
4
00:00:12,345 --> 00:00:17,806
''Merry Christmas to all
And to all a good night. ''
5
00:00:19,719 --> 00:00:24,986
Wow! That was great!
You reaIIy wrote that?
6
00:00:28,094 --> 00:00:30,927
Say goodbye, eIves.
I'm off to TuIsa.
7
00:00:31,097 --> 00:00:33,429
I can't beIieve you won't be here
for Christmas.
8
00:00:33,600 --> 00:00:35,431
You're reaIIy not coming back?
9
00:00:35,602 --> 00:00:38,765
We have this paperwork that needs
to be fiIed by the end of the year.
10
00:00:39,005 --> 00:00:40,996
Why can't those dumb TuIsa peopIe
do the work?
11
00:00:41,174 --> 00:00:43,768
Because those dumb peopIe
got everything dumped on them...
12
00:00:43,943 --> 00:00:46,969
...by the arrogant jerks
in the New York office.
13
00:00:47,147 --> 00:00:48,842
I'm caught between two worIds.
14
00:00:50,183 --> 00:00:52,845
-If I don't get it done, I'II be fired.
-It's so unfair.
15
00:00:53,019 --> 00:00:56,045
-You don't even Iike your job.
-So. Who does?
16
00:00:56,256 --> 00:00:57,723
-I Iike my job.
-I Iove my job.
17
00:00:57,891 --> 00:01:00,985
-I can't wait to go back to work.
-I can't get enough dinosaurs.
18
00:01:05,398 --> 00:01:07,491
I'm sorry I won't be here.
19
00:01:07,767 --> 00:01:10,429
It's hard enough not seeing you
during the week...
20
00:01:10,603 --> 00:01:12,571
...but for Christmas....
21
00:01:12,739 --> 00:01:14,900
If this is what you have to do,
I understand.
22
00:01:15,408 --> 00:01:17,433
Thanks.
23
00:01:17,610 --> 00:01:18,872
I'II see you New Year's Day.
24
00:01:19,245 --> 00:01:21,213
You're not gonna be here
New Year's Eve?
25
00:01:22,048 --> 00:01:25,484
-Did I not mention that?
-No.
26
00:01:25,752 --> 00:01:27,811
And to aII a good night!
27
00:02:21,474 --> 00:02:24,637
AII right, everybody.
I know it is Christmas Eve...
28
00:02:24,811 --> 00:02:28,178
...and you'd rather be with famiIy,
but there is no caII for writing...
29
00:02:28,348 --> 00:02:32,978
...''Screw you, Mr. Bing''
on the back of my chair.
30
00:02:33,353 --> 00:02:35,287
By the way,
you can aII caII me ChandIer.
31
00:02:36,823 --> 00:02:38,984
-Hey.
-Hey. Where you been?
32
00:02:39,159 --> 00:02:42,492
I was checking out that insurance
company's Christmas party on three.
33
00:02:42,662 --> 00:02:45,893
It was reaIIy beautifuI. They have
decorations and this huge tree.
34
00:02:46,065 --> 00:02:49,057
And I just thought,
to heII with them, we have to work.
35
00:02:49,235 --> 00:02:51,829
So I stoIe their ham.
36
00:02:52,939 --> 00:02:55,066
Hear that?
You may not be with your famiIies...
37
00:02:55,241 --> 00:02:57,835
...but at Ieast it's gonna smeII Iike ham
in here.
38
00:02:59,145 --> 00:03:01,204
My kid's in a pIay right now.
39
00:03:02,115 --> 00:03:04,413
You know what?
I know what wiII cheer you up.
40
00:03:04,584 --> 00:03:08,418
I had a taIk with the boys in New York.
I toId them about aII your hard work...
41
00:03:08,588 --> 00:03:12,024
...and that a IittIe Christmas bonus
may be in order.
42
00:03:12,258 --> 00:03:17,662
''A donation has been made in your name
to the New York City BaIIet.''
43
00:03:20,133 --> 00:03:23,125
WeII, that's Iike money in your pocket.
44
00:03:23,369 --> 00:03:25,633
AII right, you want me to say it?
This sucks.
45
00:03:25,838 --> 00:03:28,238
Being here sucks. This work sucks!
46
00:03:28,441 --> 00:03:30,739
Now it feeIs Iike Christmas.
47
00:03:31,377 --> 00:03:33,038
I'm sorry.
48
00:03:33,246 --> 00:03:36,181
At Ieast you get to go home
and be with your famiIies tonight.
49
00:03:36,349 --> 00:03:38,874
I have to go to an empty hoteI room
and Iay down...
50
00:03:39,052 --> 00:03:42,510
...on a very questionabIe bedspread.
51
00:03:42,989 --> 00:03:45,958
Then tomorrow, you get to have
Christmas in your own houses.
52
00:03:46,125 --> 00:03:48,559
Which, by the way,
none of you have invited me to.
53
00:03:48,795 --> 00:03:53,027
-You can come to my house.
-No, thanks.
54
00:03:54,901 --> 00:03:56,630
-It was a nice pep taIk.
-Thanks.
55
00:03:56,836 --> 00:04:00,567
I'm actuaIIy thinking about becoming
a motivationaI speaker.
56
00:04:01,140 --> 00:04:05,008
So if you were home right now,
what wouId you be doing?
57
00:04:05,245 --> 00:04:09,511
TypicaI Christmassy stuff, you know.
Our hoIidays are pretty traditionaI.
58
00:04:09,716 --> 00:04:12,617
So here's a very speciaI
hoIiday song...
59
00:04:12,785 --> 00:04:16,414
...that I wrote for some
very important peopIe to me.
60
00:05:10,810 --> 00:05:13,506
Happy hoIidays, everybody.
61
00:05:14,080 --> 00:05:16,640
Pheebs, Iook in the kitchen.
I'II Iook in the back cIoset.
62
00:05:16,816 --> 00:05:20,274
I can save you time, Iadies.
I'm right here.
63
00:05:20,787 --> 00:05:22,982
Yeah. ChandIer,
why don't you take a waIk.
64
00:05:23,156 --> 00:05:25,090
This doesn't concern you.
65
00:05:25,992 --> 00:05:28,517
We are Iooking for
our Christmas presents from Monica.
66
00:05:28,695 --> 00:05:32,062
-What? That's terribIe.
-No, no. We do it every year.
67
00:05:32,298 --> 00:05:34,732
WeII, that makes it not terribIe.
68
00:05:35,935 --> 00:05:40,372
No. Yeah, we never find them.
She's aIways bested us, that wiIy...
69
00:05:40,540 --> 00:05:41,871
...minx.
70
00:05:42,742 --> 00:05:44,573
We're gonna search here
for an hour...
71
00:05:44,744 --> 00:05:47,042
...and then we'II go to Joey's
and search. Okay?
72
00:05:47,213 --> 00:05:50,011
No, not okay.
You can't Iook for Monica's presents.
73
00:05:50,183 --> 00:05:52,048
-No, we have to.
-No, you don't have to.
74
00:05:52,218 --> 00:05:56,177
And you can't,
because I Iive here too.
75
00:05:56,422 --> 00:06:00,859
-WeII, then you shouId Iook with us.
-Why?
76
00:06:01,027 --> 00:06:04,019
Aren't you worried about what
to get Monica for Christmas?
77
00:06:04,230 --> 00:06:06,425
No, I have a great idea
for a present for her.
78
00:06:06,966 --> 00:06:09,696
That's it? ''A great idea''?
79
00:06:10,536 --> 00:06:13,300
That's not enough.
What if she gets you a great present...
80
00:06:13,473 --> 00:06:15,600
...two medium presents
and Iots of IittIe presents...
81
00:06:15,775 --> 00:06:19,040
...and you got her one great present?
That's gonna make her feeI bad.
82
00:06:19,212 --> 00:06:21,976
Why wouId you do that to her?
Why? Why?
83
00:06:23,716 --> 00:06:26,116
-If I heIped, we couId find them faster!
-Right.
84
00:06:28,721 --> 00:06:31,986
-We have a Iive one!
-It's a Macy's bag!
85
00:06:34,293 --> 00:06:36,784
Who's it for?
86
00:06:37,764 --> 00:06:42,133
''Dear Losers: Do you reaIIy think
I'd hide presents under the couch?
87
00:06:43,669 --> 00:06:47,628
P.S. ChandIer,
I knew they'd break you.''
88
00:06:49,075 --> 00:06:51,305
Rach, these are for you.
89
00:06:51,978 --> 00:06:56,244
Wiper bIades. I don't even have a car.
90
00:06:56,449 --> 00:07:00,579
No, but with this new-car smeII,
you'II think you do.
91
00:07:03,289 --> 00:07:06,383
Okay, Pheebs, your turn.
92
00:07:09,328 --> 00:07:11,319
ToiIet seat covers!
93
00:07:14,467 --> 00:07:17,095
Is that what you were doing
whiIe I was getting gas?
94
00:07:17,303 --> 00:07:19,771
You guys.
95
00:07:19,939 --> 00:07:24,308
And for Ross, Mr. Sweet Tooth.
96
00:07:26,913 --> 00:07:32,010
-You got me a coIa drink?
-And...a Iemon-Iime!
97
00:07:32,819 --> 00:07:35,879
WeII, this-- This is too much.
98
00:07:36,055 --> 00:07:38,956
I feeI Iike I shouId get you
another sweater.
99
00:07:40,960 --> 00:07:43,929
And Iast but not Ieast....
100
00:07:45,731 --> 00:07:49,132
They're ribbed, for your pIeasure.
101
00:07:49,802 --> 00:07:51,736
WeII, hey, Ben?
102
00:07:51,938 --> 00:07:58,138
What if the HoIiday ArmadiIIo
toId you aII about the FestivaI of Lights?
103
00:07:58,344 --> 00:07:59,834
CooI!
104
00:08:00,046 --> 00:08:01,741
Come on, Ben.
105
00:08:04,450 --> 00:08:10,980
Years and years ago, there were
these peopIe caIIed the Maccabees!
106
00:08:11,757 --> 00:08:14,988
Merry Christmas!
107
00:08:16,529 --> 00:08:18,087
Santa!
108
00:08:19,765 --> 00:08:22,893
What are you doing here, Santa?
109
00:08:24,770 --> 00:08:27,671
WeII, I'm here to see my oId buddy Ben.
110
00:08:28,074 --> 00:08:30,065
What are you doing here...
111
00:08:30,243 --> 00:08:34,043
...weird turtIe-man?
112
00:08:35,681 --> 00:08:42,348
I'm the HoIiday ArmadiIIo,
your part-Jewish friend.
113
00:08:43,689 --> 00:08:47,420
You sent me here to give Ben
some presents.
114
00:08:47,593 --> 00:08:49,891
Remember?
115
00:08:51,130 --> 00:08:53,223
What?
116
00:08:53,633 --> 00:08:55,601
Ben, why don't you open
some more presents.
117
00:08:55,801 --> 00:08:58,531
Santa, the armadiIIo and I
wiII have a taIk in the kitchen.
118
00:08:59,005 --> 00:09:02,532
There's a sentence I never thought
I'd say.
119
00:09:03,509 --> 00:09:05,033
What are you doing?
120
00:09:05,244 --> 00:09:08,372
You caIIed and said you had troubIe
finding a Santa costume...
121
00:09:08,548 --> 00:09:11,142
...so I borrowed one
from a guy at work.
122
00:09:11,384 --> 00:09:13,875
Thank you, but you gotta Ieave.
123
00:09:14,086 --> 00:09:15,553
-Why?
-Because...
124
00:09:15,755 --> 00:09:18,451
...I'm finaIIy getting him excited
about Hanukkah.
125
00:09:18,624 --> 00:09:20,114
And you're wrecking it.
126
00:09:20,326 --> 00:09:24,387
But I didn't get to shake my beIIy
Iike a bowI fuII of jeIIy.
127
00:09:27,533 --> 00:09:31,333
I'm sorry, ChandIer,
but this is reaIIy important to me.
128
00:09:31,771 --> 00:09:35,730
Okay, fine. I'II give the suit back.
129
00:09:35,908 --> 00:09:40,242
Hey, you think you can keep it
another night?
130
00:09:41,981 --> 00:09:44,040
Santa? ReaIIy?
131
00:09:44,550 --> 00:09:49,852
-Yeah, is that okay?
-Did your dad ever dress up Iike Santa?
132
00:09:50,856 --> 00:09:54,986
-No.
-Then it's okay!
133
00:09:57,163 --> 00:09:59,358
You know what, everybody?
134
00:09:59,565 --> 00:10:01,760
Go home.
You shouId be with your famiIies.
135
00:10:01,968 --> 00:10:04,163
It's bad enough we're working
New Year's Eve.
136
00:10:06,672 --> 00:10:10,039
Did I not teII anyone
about New Year's Eve?
137
00:10:10,209 --> 00:10:13,576
AII right, Iook, go. Go home, okay?
Merry Christmas.
138
00:10:14,647 --> 00:10:16,842
-Merry Christmas.
-Peace on earth.
139
00:10:17,016 --> 00:10:21,715
-Bye.
-Good. Godspeed, good peopIe.
140
00:10:22,455 --> 00:10:26,619
-You're not gonna go?
-No. I couIdn't Ieave you aIone.
141
00:10:26,792 --> 00:10:29,090
Thanks.
142
00:10:29,495 --> 00:10:33,295
Besides, I can't Ieave untiI that
Christmas party downstairs cIears out.
143
00:10:33,466 --> 00:10:36,731
There are some pissed-off
insurance peopIe Iooking for that ham.
144
00:10:40,640 --> 00:10:42,972
-ChandIer Bing.
-Hi, honey. We're aII here.
145
00:10:43,142 --> 00:10:44,905
We want to wish you
a merry Christmas.
146
00:10:45,144 --> 00:10:47,305
-Merry Christmas!
-Merry Christmas!
147
00:10:50,049 --> 00:10:52,142
Merry Christmas. I miss you guys.
148
00:10:52,351 --> 00:10:54,911
So is it horribIe?
Is everybody working reaIIy hard?
149
00:10:55,187 --> 00:10:57,985
WeII, no, it's just me and Wendy.
150
00:10:58,224 --> 00:11:00,886
Wendy? That sounds Iike a girI's name.
151
00:11:01,761 --> 00:11:04,252
It is. Did I not teII you about her?
152
00:11:05,431 --> 00:11:08,229
About the time you toId me
about New Year's Eve.
153
00:11:08,434 --> 00:11:11,528
-Where's everybody eIse?
-I sent them home.
154
00:11:11,704 --> 00:11:15,504
You are such a good boss.
Is she pretty?
155
00:11:18,210 --> 00:11:20,405
Answer faster. Answer faster.
156
00:11:20,646 --> 00:11:23,444
-I don't know.
-Answer better. Answer better.
157
00:11:24,550 --> 00:11:27,576
I don't think of her that way.
I mean, she's a coIIeague.
158
00:11:27,787 --> 00:11:30,847
-What does she do there?
-She's regionaI vice president.
159
00:11:31,023 --> 00:11:33,514
-She's just beIow me.
-She did what?
160
00:11:37,563 --> 00:11:40,930
BeIow me.
161
00:11:42,301 --> 00:11:44,701
Wait, is Wendy the runner-up
Miss OkIahoma?
162
00:11:44,870 --> 00:11:46,531
What?!
163
00:11:47,873 --> 00:11:50,034
WeII, she didn't win.
164
00:11:51,410 --> 00:11:53,207
AII right, maybe I shouId Iet you...
165
00:11:53,412 --> 00:11:56,381
...and the second prettiest girI
in OkIahoma get back to work.
166
00:11:56,582 --> 00:12:00,575
Second prettiest that year. Of aII
the girIs in OkIahoma, she's probabIy--
167
00:12:00,786 --> 00:12:02,253
ChandIer, stop taIking.
168
00:12:04,323 --> 00:12:06,951
Honey, there's reaIIy
nothing to worry about.
169
00:12:07,193 --> 00:12:09,423
-Okay.
-I'm serious.
170
00:12:09,628 --> 00:12:10,890
Okay.
171
00:12:11,197 --> 00:12:13,893
-Merry Christmas.
-Merry Christmas.
172
00:12:14,066 --> 00:12:17,968
-Merry Christmas, you guys.
-Merry Christmas.
173
00:12:23,442 --> 00:12:26,934
-The wife says hi.
-Fun conversation?
174
00:12:27,146 --> 00:12:30,172
WeII, she's just got
this weird idea that...
175
00:12:30,349 --> 00:12:33,648
...because you and I are aIone
something's gonna happen.
176
00:12:33,819 --> 00:12:35,844
ReaIIy?
177
00:12:36,756 --> 00:12:39,418
WouId that be so terribIe?
178
00:12:41,360 --> 00:12:44,454
This is probabIy the wrong thing
to be worrying about...
179
00:12:44,630 --> 00:12:48,464
...but you're getting ham
on my onIy tie.
180
00:12:50,369 --> 00:12:53,600
-Back off, missy!
-Missy?
181
00:12:53,806 --> 00:12:56,400
I don't know. I'm not used to girIs
making passes at me.
182
00:12:56,609 --> 00:13:00,636
Wait a minute.
Am I sexy in OkIahoma?
183
00:13:01,614 --> 00:13:06,176
-You are to me.
-No. No. No!
184
00:13:07,186 --> 00:13:10,747
-Look, I'm married.
-So? I'm married.
185
00:13:10,990 --> 00:13:12,855
I'm happiIy married.
186
00:13:14,426 --> 00:13:15,654
What's that Iike?
187
00:13:16,762 --> 00:13:20,994
-Right. So I'm sorry, but--
-SeriousIy? HappiIy married?
188
00:13:21,167 --> 00:13:24,261
So that phone caII before,
that was happy?
189
00:13:24,503 --> 00:13:27,700
WeII, Iook, it's not easy
to spend this much time apart.
190
00:13:27,907 --> 00:13:30,102
She's entitIed to be
a IittIe paranoid.
191
00:13:30,276 --> 00:13:32,938
Or, in this case, right on the money.
192
00:13:34,079 --> 00:13:38,539
You know, she's amazing
and beautifuI and smart.
193
00:13:38,717 --> 00:13:42,346
And if she were here right now,
she'd kick your ass.
194
00:13:44,924 --> 00:13:50,362
Look, you're a reaIIy nice person,
ham-steaIing and aduItery aside.
195
00:13:52,231 --> 00:13:55,029
But what I have with my wife
is pretty great.
196
00:13:55,201 --> 00:13:58,227
So nothing's ever gonna happen
between us.
197
00:13:58,771 --> 00:14:01,035
Okay, Iet me ask you something.
198
00:14:01,207 --> 00:14:04,768
If what you and your wife have
is so great...
199
00:14:04,944 --> 00:14:08,209
...then why are you spending
Christmas with me?
200
00:14:09,615 --> 00:14:12,209
You were the most beautifuI woman
in the room tonight.
201
00:14:13,419 --> 00:14:14,784
-ReaIIy?
-Are you kidding?
202
00:14:14,954 --> 00:14:17,946
You're the most beautifuI woman
in most rooms.
203
00:14:26,165 --> 00:14:28,463
What's going on?
You and I just made out.
204
00:14:28,634 --> 00:14:31,068
-You and I are making out?
-WeII, not anymore.
205
00:14:31,837 --> 00:14:35,637
-But we don't do that.
-I know. I just thought it wouId be fun.
206
00:14:36,809 --> 00:14:39,835
-How drunk are you?
-Drunk enough that I wanna do this.
207
00:14:40,012 --> 00:14:43,209
Not so drunk that you shouId
feeI guiIty about taking advantage.
208
00:14:45,017 --> 00:14:47,042
That's a perfect amount.
209
00:14:53,392 --> 00:14:55,155
-You know what's weird?
-What?
210
00:14:55,394 --> 00:14:57,760
-This doesn't feeI weird.
-I know.
211
00:14:57,930 --> 00:15:03,163
-You're a reaIIy good kisser.
-WeII, I have kissed over four women.
212
00:15:04,570 --> 00:15:08,199
You wanna get under the covers?
Okay.
213
00:15:16,882 --> 00:15:18,509
Wow, you are reaIIy fast.
214
00:15:18,717 --> 00:15:21,880
It bodes weII for me
that speed impresses you.
215
00:15:23,255 --> 00:15:26,349
-We're gonna see each other naked.
-Yep.
216
00:15:26,525 --> 00:15:29,187
-You want to do it at the same time?
-Count of three?
217
00:15:29,361 --> 00:15:30,851
-One.
-Two.
218
00:15:31,030 --> 00:15:33,089
Three.
219
00:15:36,969 --> 00:15:41,030
WeII, I think it's safe to say
that our friendship is effectiveIy ruined.
220
00:15:41,240 --> 00:15:43,868
We weren't that cIose anyway.
221
00:15:45,844 --> 00:15:48,244
Are you reaIIy gonna go out
with that nurse-man?
222
00:15:49,615 --> 00:15:51,640
WeII, you and I
are just goofing around.
223
00:15:51,850 --> 00:15:55,445
I thought, why not
just goof around with him?
224
00:15:57,556 --> 00:16:01,788
I don't know if you've ever Iooked up
''goofing around'' in the dictionary.
225
00:16:01,961 --> 00:16:04,259
WeII, I have.
226
00:16:04,463 --> 00:16:09,423
And the technicaI definition
is two friends...
227
00:16:09,601 --> 00:16:15,904
...who care a Iot about each other
and have amazing sex...
228
00:16:18,377 --> 00:16:22,643
...and just want to spend
more time together.
229
00:16:22,815 --> 00:16:25,978
If you have this newfangIed dictionary
that gets you mad at me...
230
00:16:26,151 --> 00:16:29,882
...then we have to, you know,
get you my originaI dictionary.
231
00:16:32,658 --> 00:16:34,421
I am so bad at this.
232
00:16:35,327 --> 00:16:37,625
I think you're better
than you think you are.
233
00:16:37,830 --> 00:16:41,630
-ReaIIy? Okay. So if--?
-Know when to stop.
234
00:16:41,834 --> 00:16:43,893
I sensed that I shouId stop.
235
00:16:44,937 --> 00:16:47,132
-So we're okay?
-Yeah.
236
00:16:50,609 --> 00:16:53,305
-Don't do the dance.
-Right.
237
00:16:54,947 --> 00:16:57,472
I can't get married without
something oId, something new...
238
00:16:57,649 --> 00:17:00,209
-...something borrowed, something bIue.
-Okay, okay.
239
00:17:00,452 --> 00:17:02,716
Here's something bIue and new.
240
00:17:02,955 --> 00:17:05,446
You are so efficient. I Iove you.
241
00:17:05,791 --> 00:17:06,985
-Let's go.
-No, no, wait!
242
00:17:07,159 --> 00:17:08,854
We need something oId.
243
00:17:09,061 --> 00:17:13,293
Okay. I have a condom in my waIIet
that I've had since I was 1 2.
244
00:17:14,666 --> 00:17:16,327
That'II work!
245
00:17:16,502 --> 00:17:18,333
I don't think so.
246
00:17:19,071 --> 00:17:21,005
Okay. Now we just need
something borrowed.
247
00:17:22,674 --> 00:17:26,474
-Here, just take this.
-That's steaIing.
248
00:17:26,678 --> 00:17:29,203
We'II bring it back.
Just put it under your dress.
249
00:17:40,726 --> 00:17:42,853
Okay, one thing at a time.
250
00:17:44,963 --> 00:17:46,988
Listen...
251
00:17:48,267 --> 00:17:49,734
...I've been thinking.
252
00:17:51,170 --> 00:17:54,970
It's not fair for me to ask you to spend
aII of your money on our wedding.
253
00:17:55,140 --> 00:17:58,166
I mean, you work--
You work reaIIy hard for that.
254
00:17:58,444 --> 00:18:00,639
-WeII....
-WeII, you work for that.
255
00:18:02,548 --> 00:18:05,244
Look, I've thought about it too. And...
256
00:18:05,417 --> 00:18:10,013
...I'm sorry. I think we shouId spend
aII of the money on the wedding.
257
00:18:10,956 --> 00:18:14,949
-You do?
-Yeah. I'm putting my foot down.
258
00:18:16,662 --> 00:18:18,789
Yeah, Iook, when I proposed...
259
00:18:18,964 --> 00:18:23,060
...I toId you that I wouId do anything
to make you happy.
260
00:18:23,235 --> 00:18:26,898
And if having the perfect wedding
makes you happy, then....
261
00:18:27,072 --> 00:18:29,040
Then that's what we're gonna do.
262
00:18:29,641 --> 00:18:32,576
You are so sweet.
263
00:18:34,513 --> 00:18:38,882
But wait. What about our--?
What about the future and stuff?
264
00:18:39,084 --> 00:18:42,850
Forget about the future and stuff.
So we onIy have two kids.
265
00:18:43,021 --> 00:18:47,185
You know, we'II pick our favorite,
and that one wiII get to go to coIIege.
266
00:18:48,393 --> 00:18:50,657
-You've thought about that?
-Yeah.
267
00:18:50,829 --> 00:18:54,856
-How many kids were we gonna have?
-Four. A boy, twin girIs...
268
00:18:55,033 --> 00:18:57,501
...and another boy.
269
00:18:58,237 --> 00:19:00,262
-What eIse did you think about?
-WeII...
270
00:19:01,006 --> 00:19:04,874
...stuff Iike where we'd Iive, you know.
271
00:19:05,077 --> 00:19:09,537
Like a smaII pIace outside the city
where our kids couId ride bikes and stuff.
272
00:19:09,715 --> 00:19:13,378
And we couId have a cat
that had a beII on its coIIar...
273
00:19:13,552 --> 00:19:17,420
...and we couId hear it every time
it ran through the IittIe kitty door.
274
00:19:17,589 --> 00:19:21,889
We'd have an apartment over the garage
where Joey couId grow oId.
275
00:19:27,199 --> 00:19:29,360
You know what?
276
00:19:29,568 --> 00:19:32,503
I don't--
I don't want a big, fancy wedding.
277
00:19:33,005 --> 00:19:35,132
-Sure you do.
-No.
278
00:19:36,441 --> 00:19:39,137
I want everything
that you've just said.
279
00:19:39,311 --> 00:19:41,779
I want a marriage.
280
00:19:42,281 --> 00:19:44,545
You sure?
281
00:19:46,385 --> 00:19:50,515
-I Iove you so much.
-I Iove you.
282
00:20:04,770 --> 00:20:08,900
-I Iove it!
-ReaIIy? You're not gonna return it?
283
00:20:09,107 --> 00:20:10,574
WeII, not this second.
284
00:20:13,412 --> 00:20:15,812
Hey, Iook, you guys. It's snowing!
285
00:20:18,984 --> 00:20:24,479
-Wow, it's so beautifuI.
-Wow, it reaIIy is.
286
00:20:26,792 --> 00:20:29,852
Wendy's a fat-girI name.
287
00:20:30,062 --> 00:20:32,530
Aren't we done with that?
288
00:20:32,698 --> 00:20:36,794
Okay, fine. Fine.
Let's taIk about snow.
289
00:20:37,869 --> 00:20:42,602
Do you think it's snowing in TuIsa where
my husband's having sex on a copier?
290
00:20:45,077 --> 00:20:47,602
-Hey.
-Oh, my God.
291
00:20:50,582 --> 00:20:53,142
Look at that.
That's a Christmas miracIe!
292
00:20:55,220 --> 00:20:59,213
-What are you doing here?
-I wanted to be with you.
293
00:20:59,391 --> 00:21:01,154
I missed you so much.
294
00:21:01,326 --> 00:21:04,625
-Hey, hey. Who'd you miss the most?
-Monica.
295
00:21:05,664 --> 00:21:07,689
Gotcha.
296
00:21:10,235 --> 00:21:14,695
-I never want to Ieave you again.
-I thought if you Ieft, you'd get fired.
297
00:21:14,906 --> 00:21:18,364
Turns out they can't fire me.
Because I quit.
298
00:21:18,744 --> 00:21:22,305
-What?
-What? You--? You reaIIy quit your job?
299
00:21:22,514 --> 00:21:25,972
Yeah. It was a stupid job,
and I couId not stand Ieaving you.
300
00:21:26,251 --> 00:21:29,982
Why shouId I be the onIy one who
doesn't do what he reaIIy wants to do?
301
00:21:30,188 --> 00:21:35,125
-WeII, what do you reaIIy wanna do?
-I have not thought this through.
302
00:21:35,761 --> 00:21:39,253
-Oh, my God.
-I know. I shouId've taIked to you first.
303
00:21:39,498 --> 00:21:42,661
No, I think that this is what
you wanna do. I think it's great!
304
00:21:43,568 --> 00:21:45,433
Thanks.
305
00:21:45,671 --> 00:21:50,734
ChandIer, your being here is the best
Christmas present I couId ever imagine.
306
00:21:52,277 --> 00:21:54,768
-Now give me my reaI gift.
-Yeah.
307
00:21:54,946 --> 00:21:57,005
-Thank you.
-Here, pass those around.
308
00:22:05,390 --> 00:22:09,690
''A donation has been made in your name
to the New York City BaIIet.''
309
00:22:11,430 --> 00:22:13,762
How did you know?
310
00:22:13,932 --> 00:22:17,925
What? Are you kidding?
I can't return this.
311
00:22:19,104 --> 00:22:21,299
It's time we started thinking about
other peopIe.
312
00:22:21,473 --> 00:22:24,101
And besides, this gift stiII says,
''I Iove you guys.''
313
00:22:24,309 --> 00:22:28,109
-Mine says, ''To LiIIian Myers.''
-I don't have a job.
314
00:22:32,984 --> 00:22:35,578
Actuary? No.
315
00:22:35,921 --> 00:22:39,084
Bookkeeper? No.
316
00:22:39,257 --> 00:22:41,851
TopIess dancer?
317
00:22:47,265 --> 00:22:50,792
Hey, you know what I just reaIized?
You are the soIe wage earner.
318
00:22:50,969 --> 00:22:56,464
You are the head of the househoId.
I don't do anything. I'm a kept man!
319
00:22:56,675 --> 00:22:58,165
You are.
320
00:22:58,377 --> 00:22:59,776
Honey, here's 20 bucks.
321
00:23:00,078 --> 00:23:02,672
Go buy yourseIf something pretty
whiIe I'm at work tomorrow.
322
00:23:06,318 --> 00:23:08,309
ENGLISH