1 00:00:05,081 --> 00:00:06,499 -Hi! -Hey! 2 00:00:06,666 --> 00:00:10,086 So, what's the final head count on my baby shower? 3 00:00:10,253 --> 00:00:13,172 About twenty. Couple people from work had something else to do. 4 00:00:13,339 --> 00:00:15,299 Your sisters called and can't make it. 5 00:00:15,508 --> 00:00:18,177 What? You mean they're not coming to a social event.. 6 00:00:18,344 --> 00:00:22,598 where there's no men and no booze? That's shocking. 7 00:00:22,849 --> 00:00:24,725 I don't care, as long as my mom's here. 8 00:00:25,184 --> 00:00:28,896 -Oh, my God. Your mother. -What? My mom's not gonna be here? 9 00:00:29,105 --> 00:00:33,734 Well, given that we forgot to invite her, it would be a big coincidence if she was. 10 00:00:34,193 --> 00:00:36,195 My God! 11 00:00:36,404 --> 00:00:39,157 Phoebe was in charge of the invitations. 12 00:00:39,323 --> 00:00:42,034 I don't have a mother. So often I forget.. 13 00:00:42,243 --> 00:00:44,620 Oh, give it a rest. 14 00:00:44,912 --> 00:00:48,040 So my mother is not coming to my baby shower? 15 00:00:48,207 --> 00:00:49,584 No. 16 00:00:50,042 --> 00:00:52,879 Neither is mine. 17 00:00:53,087 --> 00:00:57,550 We'll take care of it. We'll call her. You go home and get ready. 18 00:00:57,717 --> 00:01:01,220 Make sure she comes. It's important. It's my mom. 19 00:01:01,429 --> 00:01:04,557 -I know. What's her number? -I don't know. 20 00:01:04,766 --> 00:01:07,727 Go. I have it in my book. Go. 21 00:01:13,357 --> 00:01:17,278 If you're in charge of invitations, why am I calling her? 22 00:01:17,445 --> 00:01:20,573 Hello, Mrs. Green! Hi, it's Monica Geller. 23 00:01:20,781 --> 00:01:22,408 -Oh, hello, Monica. -Hi. 24 00:01:22,617 --> 00:01:26,454 It's last-minute, but we've decided to throw an impromptu.. 25 00:01:26,704 --> 00:01:30,625 -baby shower for Rachel today. -My daughters told me.. 26 00:01:30,792 --> 00:01:35,421 when they received their impromptu invitations a month ago. 27 00:01:35,630 --> 00:01:39,217 -Okay, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. -For what, dear? 28 00:01:39,425 --> 00:01:42,428 For not inviting me, or for lying about it? 29 00:01:42,637 --> 00:01:46,724 Oh, my God! My ass is sweating. 30 00:01:46,891 --> 00:01:49,060 I'm sorry for everything. Really, I mean.. 31 00:01:49,227 --> 00:01:51,604 there's a lot of planning in a baby shower. 32 00:01:51,771 --> 00:01:54,440 You know, things get overlooked and.. 33 00:01:55,441 --> 00:01:56,859 Phoebe's mother killed herself. 34 00:01:58,528 --> 00:02:00,279 Why? Did you forget to invite her too? 35 00:02:02,323 --> 00:02:04,492 Oh, you're so funny. 36 00:02:05,827 --> 00:02:09,956 Please, please, can you come? It starts at 4:00. 37 00:02:10,998 --> 00:02:14,627 -Well, all right. I'll see you at 4. -Thank you. 38 00:02:15,628 --> 00:02:20,591 -Isn't it at 3? -Son of a bitch! 39 00:02:58,045 --> 00:02:59,839 Hey, Joe! Wanna shoot some hoops? 40 00:03:00,047 --> 00:03:02,842 And for the record, I am not covering the tall one this time. 41 00:03:03,009 --> 00:03:05,636 Fine, but she's not that tall. 42 00:03:06,429 --> 00:03:10,474 I can't go. I'm practicing. I got an audition to be the host of a new game show. 43 00:03:10,641 --> 00:03:11,684 -Cool! -Great! 44 00:03:11,934 --> 00:03:15,104 If I get it, by day I'll be Dr. Drake Ramoray. 45 00:03:15,271 --> 00:03:19,317 But by night I'll be Joey Tribbiani! 46 00:03:19,942 --> 00:03:22,403 You'll be perfect for this! That's already your name! 47 00:03:22,570 --> 00:03:23,821 I know. I know. 48 00:03:23,988 --> 00:03:27,617 It'd be great if I got this because you never know what could happen on a soap. 49 00:03:27,783 --> 00:03:29,702 But I could be a game-show host forever. 50 00:03:29,869 --> 00:03:34,790 Like that Bob Barker guy. He's been doing The Price is Right for 75 years. 51 00:03:35,583 --> 00:03:37,752 I bet the ratings weren't good for the first 25. 52 00:03:37,918 --> 00:03:39,837 You know, before there was television. 53 00:03:41,839 --> 00:03:44,133 But the problem, this game is really complicated. 54 00:03:44,300 --> 00:03:47,053 Come on. You said the same thing about Hungry Hungry Hippos. 55 00:03:47,261 --> 00:03:49,055 And last week, you beat Ben. 56 00:03:49,263 --> 00:03:52,391 Yeah. I have to be honest with you guys. 57 00:03:52,558 --> 00:03:54,310 He kind of let me win. 58 00:03:54,936 --> 00:03:58,272 The audition's in a couple hours, and I don't understand the game. 59 00:03:58,606 --> 00:03:59,899 Do you want some help? 60 00:04:00,107 --> 00:04:04,737 Oh, really? That'd be great. Hey, you guys can be the contestants! 61 00:04:04,946 --> 00:04:08,366 We can lose to junior-high girls some other time. 62 00:04:08,949 --> 00:04:11,786 All right. Let's play Bamboozled! 63 00:04:11,953 --> 00:04:13,913 -Bamboozled? -Yeah. Isn't that a cool name? 64 00:04:14,080 --> 00:04:15,289 -Yeah! -No! 65 00:04:15,456 --> 00:04:19,794 All right. Okay. Our first contestant is Ross Geller. 66 00:04:20,002 --> 00:04:22,213 Tell us about yourself, Ross. 67 00:04:22,380 --> 00:04:27,093 Well, I'm a paleontologist. I live in New York. 68 00:04:27,259 --> 00:04:32,139 I have a son, Ben. Hi, Ben! And.. 69 00:04:32,473 --> 00:04:35,810 I said, a little bit, Ross. How about you, Chandler? 70 00:04:35,977 --> 00:04:39,980 I'm a headhunter. I hook up out-of-work Soviet scientists.. 71 00:04:40,147 --> 00:04:43,442 with rogue Third World nations. Hi, Rasputin. 72 00:04:43,651 --> 00:04:47,321 Excellent! Let's play! Chandler, you'll go first. 73 00:04:47,530 --> 00:04:50,324 -What is the capital of Colombia? -Bogota. 74 00:04:50,574 --> 00:04:53,619 It's Bogota, but close enough. 75 00:04:54,662 --> 00:04:59,166 You can either pass your turn to Ross or pick a Wicked Wango Card. 76 00:04:59,417 --> 00:05:03,462 -What does a Wicked Wango Card do? -I should know that. 77 00:05:04,630 --> 00:05:06,966 Let's see. One moment, please.. 78 00:05:07,133 --> 00:05:13,431 Here we are. A Wicked Wango Card determines if you go higher or lower. 79 00:05:13,597 --> 00:05:15,933 Higher or lower than what? 80 00:05:16,684 --> 00:05:21,439 -This is embarrassing! -Can you believe how lame this is? 81 00:05:21,605 --> 00:05:26,986 I'm sorry. I don't believe contestants are allowed to talk to each other. 82 00:05:30,656 --> 00:05:34,660 I told the stripper to be here at 5. That's good, right? 83 00:05:35,870 --> 00:05:39,165 You ordered a stripper for the shower? That is inappropriate. 84 00:05:39,373 --> 00:05:42,168 Why? He's gonna be dressed as a baby. 85 00:05:43,377 --> 00:05:47,006 Oh, hi, Mrs. Green. I'm so glad you could make it. 86 00:05:47,214 --> 00:05:51,969 Thank you so much. We're so sorry. We could not feel worse about it. 87 00:05:52,136 --> 00:05:53,679 Try. 88 00:05:54,889 --> 00:05:56,682 There's my little girl! 89 00:05:57,391 --> 00:05:59,518 -She's still mad. -Yeah, I know. 90 00:05:59,685 --> 00:06:02,897 Isn't it great? One less person to make small talk with. 91 00:06:03,063 --> 00:06:04,190 Hey, how are you? 92 00:06:04,398 --> 00:06:06,233 Yeah, yeah. Okay, okay. 93 00:06:08,736 --> 00:06:12,281 Phoebe, Sandra's mad at you too. It doesn't bother you? 94 00:06:12,490 --> 00:06:16,202 We've apologized twice. I can't do any more than that. 95 00:06:16,368 --> 00:06:19,121 You hate it when people are mad at you.. 96 00:06:19,288 --> 00:06:22,416 but you just have to be okay with it. 97 00:06:22,583 --> 00:06:25,920 Okay. I can do that. 98 00:06:26,087 --> 00:06:29,381 -I gotta go powder my ass. -Oh. 99 00:06:29,632 --> 00:06:32,676 Look at that face! Just like when you were in high school. 100 00:06:32,843 --> 00:06:37,264 If I didn't know better, I'd say you were a cheerleader in trouble. 101 00:06:37,431 --> 00:06:39,141 -Come, let's get some tea. -Okay. 102 00:06:39,308 --> 00:06:42,478 Oh, my! Look at that. Only three weeks to go. 103 00:06:42,645 --> 00:06:47,399 Did you pick a nanny? If you use your housekeeper, it will split her focus. 104 00:06:47,566 --> 00:06:52,196 Actually, I'm not gonna use a nanny. And I don't have a housekeeper. 105 00:06:52,404 --> 00:06:55,407 It's like you're a cave person. 106 00:06:55,825 --> 00:07:00,246 You must get a nanny. You don't know how overwhelming it will be. 107 00:07:00,412 --> 00:07:03,707 When you were a baby, I had Mrs. K. 108 00:07:03,916 --> 00:07:07,962 Mrs. K! Oh, yeah, she was sweet. She taught me Spanish. 109 00:07:08,129 --> 00:07:10,881 I actually think I remember some of it. 110 00:07:11,048 --> 00:07:14,844 Tu madre esta loca. 111 00:07:15,803 --> 00:07:18,055 Such a sweet woman. 112 00:07:18,222 --> 00:07:20,808 And more important, she became a part of our family. 113 00:07:20,975 --> 00:07:24,103 That's right, Mrs. K. What did that K stand for? 114 00:07:24,311 --> 00:07:26,564 I have no idea, dear. She was the nanny. 115 00:07:27,314 --> 00:07:30,234 As great as she was, I can't afford that. 116 00:07:30,985 --> 00:07:34,405 I'm sorry. Sometimes I forget not everyone has alimony. 117 00:07:36,615 --> 00:07:38,450 -Oh, Rachel! -What? 118 00:07:38,617 --> 00:07:42,580 I just had a great idea! I'm gonna come live with you! 119 00:07:43,247 --> 00:07:45,249 What? What? 120 00:07:45,457 --> 00:07:50,129 Oh, I'm so happy I'm gonna do this for my little girl. 121 00:07:50,296 --> 00:07:53,757 Look at you. You have tears in your eyes. 122 00:07:55,342 --> 00:07:58,095 Yes, yes, I do. 123 00:07:59,805 --> 00:08:01,223 Ross, you're in the lead. 124 00:08:01,432 --> 00:08:04,727 Would you like to take another question or spin the Wheel of Mayhem? 125 00:08:04,935 --> 00:08:08,647 The Wheel has not been my friend tonight, Joey. 126 00:08:08,856 --> 00:08:10,649 I'll take another question. 127 00:08:10,858 --> 00:08:13,027 Okay. This is gonna be tough. Hold your breath. 128 00:08:13,235 --> 00:08:14,987 It's okay. I'm ready. 129 00:08:15,196 --> 00:08:18,157 You gotta hold your breath until you answer. 130 00:08:18,365 --> 00:08:21,327 This is ridiculous! He's not gonna hold his.. 131 00:08:22,703 --> 00:08:28,959 Okay. What do you have a fear of if you suffer from this phobia? Triska.. 132 00:08:29,126 --> 00:08:33,213 Holy cow. That's a big word. Trisk.. 133 00:08:33,380 --> 00:08:35,883 Look at this. How do you say that? 134 00:08:36,050 --> 00:08:39,136 -Let me see that. -This one right here. 135 00:08:40,179 --> 00:08:43,015 -Triskaidekaphobia. -Fear of Triscuits! 136 00:08:43,182 --> 00:08:47,561 -No! No. Fear of the number 13. -Fear of Triscuits? 137 00:08:47,811 --> 00:08:51,231 It's possible. They have really sharp edges. 138 00:08:52,566 --> 00:08:54,068 Chandler, you're up. 139 00:08:54,276 --> 00:08:57,863 I'm entitled to use my Angel Pass for a free turn. 140 00:08:58,113 --> 00:09:02,034 Yes, yes. But you can only use it once, so choose wisely. 141 00:09:02,868 --> 00:09:04,536 This is tricky. 142 00:09:05,537 --> 00:09:10,209 I mean, I am in the lead, but I would love another shot at the Golden Monkey. 143 00:09:11,418 --> 00:09:15,714 -This game makes no sense! -You're upset because you're losing. 144 00:09:15,923 --> 00:09:19,843 Oh, come on, Ross. I think we're all losers here. 145 00:09:20,469 --> 00:09:23,430 I would like to hang on to my Angel Pass please. 146 00:09:23,722 --> 00:09:27,476 You can either spin the Wheel or pick a Google Card. 147 00:09:27,643 --> 00:09:31,230 Let me think, let me think. Oh, I don't care. 148 00:09:33,232 --> 00:09:34,900 You must choose. 149 00:09:35,067 --> 00:09:39,446 -Either. It makes no difference. -Choose, you jackass. 150 00:09:40,447 --> 00:09:43,742 -I'll take a card. -You picked the Gimme Card! 151 00:09:43,951 --> 00:09:47,371 -You get all of Ross' points! -What? 152 00:09:48,122 --> 00:09:50,749 This game is kind of fun! 153 00:09:50,958 --> 00:09:54,086 You don't think it's crazy that you get my points..? 154 00:09:54,295 --> 00:09:58,215 The contestants aren't supposed to speak to each other. 155 00:10:00,426 --> 00:10:03,053 Now, do you wanna start opening presents.. 156 00:10:03,220 --> 00:10:05,973 because it seems like people are getting itchy to leave. 157 00:10:06,140 --> 00:10:07,766 And when I say people, I mean me. 158 00:10:11,312 --> 00:10:14,732 -Why did you invite my mother? -What? 159 00:10:14,940 --> 00:10:18,235 She wants to move in with me and Ross to help take care of the baby. 160 00:10:18,485 --> 00:10:20,779 -For how long? -Eight weeks. 161 00:10:20,988 --> 00:10:25,534 I love my mother, but, my God, a long lunch with her is taxing. 162 00:10:25,743 --> 00:10:28,746 I'd be honored if she wanted to live with me. 163 00:10:28,954 --> 00:10:31,457 She can't hear you. 164 00:10:32,666 --> 00:10:34,293 What am I gonna do? 165 00:10:34,501 --> 00:10:38,339 If you don't want her to move in with you, just tell her. 166 00:10:38,505 --> 00:10:41,508 You're right. I'm about to have a baby. 167 00:10:41,675 --> 00:10:44,845 I can say I don't want her sleeping on my couch. 168 00:10:45,012 --> 00:10:48,307 She'll wanna sleep in my bed. This can't happen. 169 00:10:48,515 --> 00:10:49,767 That is right. 170 00:10:49,933 --> 00:10:52,728 Tell her you don't want her to live with you. 171 00:10:52,895 --> 00:10:55,272 Do not take no for an answer. 172 00:10:56,190 --> 00:11:00,861 This is great! Now she's gonna be mad at Rachel! 173 00:11:01,028 --> 00:11:06,158 And I'm just gonna swoop in there and be like the daughter she never had. 174 00:11:06,367 --> 00:11:08,077 Oh, honey, you have to let it go. 175 00:11:09,370 --> 00:11:10,746 Okay. 176 00:11:12,498 --> 00:11:14,583 Who doesn't accept an apology? 177 00:11:14,750 --> 00:11:16,335 I mean, it's just so simple. 178 00:11:16,502 --> 00:11:18,754 "I'm sorry, Sandra." "That's okay, Monica. 179 00:11:18,921 --> 00:11:20,089 I forgive you. 180 00:11:20,255 --> 00:11:22,091 And by the way, you're very pretty." 181 00:11:24,134 --> 00:11:28,555 I have new respect for Chandler. 182 00:11:28,764 --> 00:11:33,060 All right, everybody! It's time to open the presents! 183 00:11:33,227 --> 00:11:36,230 Yes! The first gift that Rachel opens.. 184 00:11:36,396 --> 00:11:38,857 should be from the grandmother. 185 00:11:39,024 --> 00:11:44,947 Because you're the most important person in this room! And in the world! 186 00:11:45,405 --> 00:11:48,534 I don't have a gift because I wasn't invited until the last minute. 187 00:11:48,700 --> 00:11:53,705 But thank you so much, dear, for bringing that to everybody's attention. 188 00:11:55,749 --> 00:12:00,295 How about you less important people? Let's open your presents! 189 00:12:01,255 --> 00:12:05,134 -It's okay that you didn't get a gift. -I kind of did. 190 00:12:05,300 --> 00:12:07,719 Me! Eight weeks of me. 191 00:12:07,886 --> 00:12:11,723 Okay. See, Mom, the truth is, I can do this on my own. 192 00:12:11,890 --> 00:12:14,643 I know you're gonna be a terrific mom. 193 00:12:14,810 --> 00:12:17,771 But you need help at the beginning. 194 00:12:17,938 --> 00:12:20,607 I know what I'm doing. I can handle it. 195 00:12:20,774 --> 00:12:22,609 Really? Remember Twinkles? 196 00:12:22,818 --> 00:12:26,780 He was a hamster. I'm not gonna vacuum up my baby! 197 00:12:26,947 --> 00:12:30,284 Okay, come on, Rach. It's present time! 198 00:12:30,451 --> 00:12:33,453 You're the glue holding this party together. 199 00:12:33,620 --> 00:12:36,915 It's kind of falling apart here. 200 00:12:37,124 --> 00:12:39,293 -Oh, look! -Wow! 201 00:12:39,460 --> 00:12:41,336 This is from your friends at work. 202 00:12:41,503 --> 00:12:47,092 Oh, my gosh! Oh, wow! Oh, I know what this is. 203 00:12:47,259 --> 00:12:49,094 Wait a minute. 204 00:12:49,261 --> 00:12:52,222 That can't be right. 205 00:12:52,806 --> 00:12:56,018 Is that a beer bong for a baby? 206 00:12:56,977 --> 00:12:59,313 Darling, that's a breast pump. 207 00:13:00,647 --> 00:13:06,278 Did I say I was done guessing? Okay, thank you for that. 208 00:13:06,486 --> 00:13:09,031 Oh, wow! What's this? 209 00:13:09,281 --> 00:13:12,659 -It's a Diaper Genie. -It dispenses clean diapers! 210 00:13:12,868 --> 00:13:14,953 It's where you put dirty ones. 211 00:13:15,329 --> 00:13:19,124 Why don't you take it outside and throw it in a dumpster? 212 00:13:19,333 --> 00:13:24,338 -You're gonna do that 10 times a day? -What, it goes 10 times a day? 213 00:13:24,505 --> 00:13:27,049 Are we feeding this baby Indian food? 214 00:13:27,674 --> 00:13:30,385 No, dear. That's what babies do. 215 00:13:30,677 --> 00:13:34,973 Rachel, listen to your mother. She is very smart. 216 00:13:36,058 --> 00:13:40,896 What will you do with the baby while you trot out to the garbage? 217 00:13:41,521 --> 00:13:45,067 I don't know, I'd leave it on the changing table? 218 00:13:45,317 --> 00:13:50,322 -What? What did I do? What did I do? -You can't leave a baby alone. 219 00:13:50,489 --> 00:13:52,199 Of course, I know that! 220 00:13:52,366 --> 00:13:55,244 Of course you never leave a baby alone. 221 00:13:55,410 --> 00:13:57,871 It would.. She wouldn't be safe. 222 00:13:58,288 --> 00:14:02,209 Not as safe as she would be with me, the baby dummy. 223 00:14:02,376 --> 00:14:06,213 Opening the presents is a little overwhelming right now. 224 00:14:06,380 --> 00:14:09,841 I'm gonna maybe open them all a little bit later. 225 00:14:10,008 --> 00:14:12,511 Thank you for coming, for the gifts.. 226 00:14:12,719 --> 00:14:18,183 -and this basket is beautiful. -It's actually a bassinet. 227 00:14:18,392 --> 00:14:21,561 Okay, Mommy, don't ever leave me. 228 00:14:23,397 --> 00:14:27,609 In what film would you hear this line: "We don't need no stinking badges!" 229 00:14:27,818 --> 00:14:30,737 -Treasure of the Sierra Madre! -Correct! Backwards Bonus. 230 00:14:30,904 --> 00:14:34,491 -Madre Sierra the of Treasure! -Yes! 231 00:14:34,658 --> 00:14:36,493 What? There's extra points for that? 232 00:14:36,660 --> 00:14:38,370 Fair not that's! 233 00:14:39,079 --> 00:14:41,873 I'd like to go up the Ladder of Chance to the Golden Mud Hut! 234 00:14:42,040 --> 00:14:44,376 -Wise choice. How many rungs? -Six! 235 00:14:45,586 --> 00:14:50,007 -That noise can only mean one thing. -Hungry Monkey! 236 00:14:50,632 --> 00:14:54,386 -I'd like a Wicked Wango Card. -It's an audio question. 237 00:14:54,595 --> 00:14:58,348 Name this television theme song: 238 00:14:59,891 --> 00:15:02,811 Oh, my God. I know this. Give me a second. 239 00:15:03,020 --> 00:15:05,063 -Tell it to the Time Turtle! -Shut up! 240 00:15:05,230 --> 00:15:07,357 -"I Dream of Jeannie"! -Yes! Back in the lead! 241 00:15:07,524 --> 00:15:09,818 I'd like to spin the Wheel. 242 00:15:15,198 --> 00:15:17,409 Oh, come on! 243 00:15:17,576 --> 00:15:19,244 Super Speedy Speed Round. 244 00:15:19,453 --> 00:15:22,247 -Is there a Hopping Bonus? -Of course. 245 00:15:25,709 --> 00:15:27,919 -Who invented bifocals? -Ben Franklin! 246 00:15:28,128 --> 00:15:30,964 Correct. Which monarch ruled Great Britain the longest? 247 00:15:31,173 --> 00:15:32,424 Queen Victoria! 248 00:15:32,633 --> 00:15:36,845 You forgot to switch legs between questions. No Hopping Bonus! 249 00:15:37,012 --> 00:15:39,222 Every time! 250 00:15:39,389 --> 00:15:43,393 -Yeah. Now over to Chandler. -I'd like a Google Card. 251 00:15:43,560 --> 00:15:48,273 -Are you sure? -Yes! No! Google! 252 00:15:49,816 --> 00:15:53,612 Oh, my God! Congratulations, Ross! Because, Chandler.. 253 00:15:53,779 --> 00:15:55,947 -you've been Bamboozled! -No! 254 00:15:56,156 --> 00:16:01,536 -Yes! -This is the best game ever! 255 00:16:02,287 --> 00:16:04,748 You'll stay as long as I need you? 256 00:16:04,915 --> 00:16:07,584 -Of course. -I swear I'm not an idiot. 257 00:16:07,751 --> 00:16:10,754 I read books on pregnancy and giving birth. 258 00:16:11,004 --> 00:16:15,258 I didn't think to read about what to do when the baby comes. 259 00:16:15,425 --> 00:16:17,135 And the baby's coming.. 260 00:16:17,302 --> 00:16:22,391 and I don't know what to do. Oh, can I throw up in my Diaper Genie? 261 00:16:22,557 --> 00:16:25,644 Sweetie, you're gonna be fine. 262 00:16:26,019 --> 00:16:29,064 -Where you going? -I'm going to the bathroom. 263 00:16:29,272 --> 00:16:34,069 Now, don't worry. Everything's gonna be okay. 264 00:16:34,903 --> 00:16:37,114 It is gonna be okay! 265 00:16:41,243 --> 00:16:43,412 Worth a shot. 266 00:16:45,205 --> 00:16:48,166 Hey! Why are you all red and sweaty? 267 00:16:48,417 --> 00:16:50,877 I just Bamboozled Chandler! 268 00:16:53,964 --> 00:16:56,299 Which is not a sexual thing. 269 00:16:58,301 --> 00:17:02,431 -Well, that was a quick shower. -Not if you were here. 270 00:17:02,889 --> 00:17:04,808 Looks like we got a lot of good stuff. 271 00:17:04,975 --> 00:17:07,769 We did. My mom got us the greatest gift of all. 272 00:17:07,978 --> 00:17:09,938 A Play-Doh Barbershop? 273 00:17:11,106 --> 00:17:15,193 No. She's going to live with us for eight weeks. 274 00:17:15,485 --> 00:17:16,862 What? 275 00:17:17,070 --> 00:17:20,866 Yes! She's gonna help us take care of the baby! 276 00:17:21,783 --> 00:17:23,869 You're not serious! 277 00:17:24,077 --> 00:17:28,290 She's a very nice woman, but we can't take eight weeks of her. 278 00:17:28,457 --> 00:17:30,667 -She'll drive us crazy.. -Hi, Ross! 279 00:17:30,834 --> 00:17:33,044 Hey, roomie! 280 00:17:39,009 --> 00:17:42,179 Hey, I'm Ray. I'm the producer of the show. 281 00:17:42,387 --> 00:17:45,515 It's a pleasure to meet you, Ray. 282 00:17:45,682 --> 00:17:49,936 This is Duncan and Erin. They're gonna help with the audition. 283 00:17:50,145 --> 00:17:54,149 -Right, Ray. -Whenever you're ready. 284 00:17:54,357 --> 00:17:58,904 Hello. I'm Joey Tribbiani. Let's play Bamboozled! 285 00:17:59,112 --> 00:18:03,742 Erin, first question. In hockey, who is known as "The Great One"? 286 00:18:03,950 --> 00:18:05,160 -Gretzky. -Correct! 287 00:18:05,368 --> 00:18:09,247 Want to pick a Wicked Wango Card or spin the Wheel? 288 00:18:09,456 --> 00:18:12,667 Didn't your agents give you the revised rules? 289 00:18:12,834 --> 00:18:15,921 We've eliminated all that. No wheel. No cards. 290 00:18:16,087 --> 00:18:18,048 Why? 291 00:18:18,256 --> 00:18:22,427 It was too complicated. People didn't follow it. 292 00:18:22,594 --> 00:18:26,598 Complicated?! Spin the Wheel to go up the Ladder of Chance.. 293 00:18:26,765 --> 00:18:30,101 through the Rainbow Ring to the Golden Monkey. 294 00:18:30,268 --> 00:18:33,438 You yank his tail, and you're in Paradise Pond! 295 00:18:34,064 --> 00:18:36,274 Yeah. All that's gone. 296 00:18:36,483 --> 00:18:39,569 It's a simple question-and-answer game now. 297 00:18:39,778 --> 00:18:41,947 Well, what's fun about that? 298 00:18:42,155 --> 00:18:46,618 You expect me to host a boring game of people answering questions? 299 00:18:46,868 --> 00:18:49,621 Women in bikinis hold up the scores. 300 00:18:49,829 --> 00:18:52,749 Let's play Bamboozled! 301 00:18:53,041 --> 00:18:56,086 So I thought we'd put the changing station in the living room. 302 00:18:56,336 --> 00:18:59,673 I thought I'd bring in my decorator because I feel like I'm at my best.. 303 00:18:59,840 --> 00:19:01,800 when surrounded by jewel tones. 304 00:19:03,343 --> 00:19:05,345 Sure, who doesn't? 305 00:19:06,680 --> 00:19:10,141 Oh, and all those dinosaur knickknacks you have.. 306 00:19:10,350 --> 00:19:12,561 they might be more at home in the garage. 307 00:19:12,853 --> 00:19:18,233 -Well, we don't have a garage. -Did I say garage? I meant garbage. 308 00:19:19,401 --> 00:19:24,406 You know what? Maybe it's not absolutely vital that you live with us. 309 00:19:24,573 --> 00:19:30,120 -Well, Rachel needs help with the baby. -I really do. I don't know anything. 310 00:19:30,537 --> 00:19:32,163 I'm sure that's not true. 311 00:19:32,372 --> 00:19:35,208 Oh, no? Do I know anything about babies? 312 00:19:35,375 --> 00:19:38,461 -No. Not a thing. -It's frightening. 313 00:19:38,712 --> 00:19:41,756 Even if she doesn't know anything, I do. 314 00:19:41,923 --> 00:19:44,050 And I'll be there to show her. 315 00:19:44,926 --> 00:19:47,387 That's exactly what Rachel's father told me. 316 00:19:47,554 --> 00:19:49,806 Know what he said at the first 3 a.m. feeding? 317 00:19:49,973 --> 00:19:52,183 "I'm tired. You take care of it." 318 00:19:52,392 --> 00:19:55,020 Which I later said to him when he wanted to have sex. 319 00:20:00,150 --> 00:20:02,360 Well, I'm not Rachel's dad. 320 00:20:02,569 --> 00:20:04,988 And no offense, but he's an ass. 321 00:20:06,448 --> 00:20:08,408 I do like you, Ross. 322 00:20:09,909 --> 00:20:13,455 I have a son. His mother and I didn't live together. 323 00:20:13,622 --> 00:20:18,168 When he was with me, I took care of him all the time, by myself. 324 00:20:18,335 --> 00:20:21,504 -That's true. You do have another child. -Yeah. 325 00:20:21,671 --> 00:20:23,465 With another woman. 326 00:20:23,673 --> 00:20:27,010 Have you no control, Ross? 327 00:20:29,012 --> 00:20:31,514 That's a different issue. 328 00:20:32,015 --> 00:20:36,895 The point is, when the baby comes, I will be there to feed her.. 329 00:20:37,062 --> 00:20:39,397 and bathe her and change her. 330 00:20:39,606 --> 00:20:42,901 I want to do all those things. 331 00:20:43,109 --> 00:20:47,697 -You don't need me to live with you. -Yes! 332 00:20:48,448 --> 00:20:51,868 Yes. You're gonna be so missed. 333 00:20:52,327 --> 00:20:56,373 -You'll be a great father. -You'll be a wonderful grandma. 334 00:20:56,748 --> 00:21:00,710 Hello? I still don't know what the hell I'm doing! 335 00:21:00,960 --> 00:21:04,255 Every first-time mother feels that way. 336 00:21:04,422 --> 00:21:10,428 You're gonna pick it up. Hey, you will. Look, when you first came to the city.. 337 00:21:10,595 --> 00:21:15,934 you were a spoiled, helpless little girl who used Daddy's credit cards! 338 00:21:16,351 --> 00:21:19,104 I hope you're going somewhere with this. 339 00:21:19,312 --> 00:21:22,107 Look at you. You're this big executive. 340 00:21:22,357 --> 00:21:25,068 You are more capable than you give yourself credit for. 341 00:21:25,276 --> 00:21:29,406 I have no doubt you're gonna be an incredible mother. 342 00:21:29,656 --> 00:21:32,784 -Really? -I'm telling you. 343 00:21:33,702 --> 00:21:35,578 Thank you. 344 00:21:37,956 --> 00:21:40,375 All right. I'm gonna get going. 345 00:21:40,917 --> 00:21:42,919 No, sweetheart, stay put. 346 00:21:43,128 --> 00:21:48,216 I'll let myself out. It's like I'm not here. Which I almost wasn't. 347 00:21:49,259 --> 00:21:54,472 You're just so funny. You're so funny. What do I do? 348 00:21:54,848 --> 00:21:58,727 Nothing. You have apologized to her, like, a million times. 349 00:21:58,893 --> 00:22:01,980 And she's been nothing but terrible to you. 350 00:22:02,230 --> 00:22:07,485 You just threw her daughter a lovely, albeit slightly boring, shower. 351 00:22:07,652 --> 00:22:12,741 -And she hasn't even thanked you for it. -You know what? You're right. 352 00:22:12,991 --> 00:22:16,119 If you wanna say anything, I'd tell her off. 353 00:22:16,286 --> 00:22:17,746 Really? 354 00:22:19,205 --> 00:22:21,499 Okay, I will. 355 00:22:21,708 --> 00:22:24,002 Mrs. Green? 356 00:22:24,294 --> 00:22:25,754 Mrs. Green? 357 00:22:25,920 --> 00:22:28,840 It is rude to leave a party without saying goodbye to the host. 358 00:22:29,048 --> 00:22:33,845 When someone apologizes to you, the decent thing to do is to accept it. 359 00:22:34,053 --> 00:22:36,306 What I did wasn't on purpose. 360 00:22:36,473 --> 00:22:40,143 But what you're doing to me now is plain spiteful. 361 00:22:40,351 --> 00:22:41,686 -Spiteful? -That's right. 362 00:22:41,895 --> 00:22:45,815 It's time you took a good look in the mirror, young lady! 363 00:22:45,982 --> 00:22:47,692 Old lady! 364 00:22:47,901 --> 00:22:49,694 Lady! 365 00:22:49,903 --> 00:22:52,781 Wrap it up. Wrap it up. Wrap it up. 366 00:22:53,656 --> 00:22:57,660 So whenever you're ready to apologize to me, I will forgive you. 367 00:22:57,827 --> 00:23:00,163 Good day. 368 00:23:02,916 --> 00:23:05,043 I can't feel my legs! 369 00:23:05,835 --> 00:23:08,755 You were fantastic! I'm so proud of you. 370 00:23:09,380 --> 00:23:12,967 -Yeah? I'm proud of me too. -You should be. 371 00:23:13,218 --> 00:23:17,639 -Could you get me something to drink? -You got it! 372 00:23:17,806 --> 00:23:22,685 Mrs. Green? Okay, I'm really sorry! I apologize. If you.. 373 00:23:24,104 --> 00:23:27,357 Okay! I bit my tongue! 374 00:23:27,524 --> 00:23:30,860 But I'm still really sorry! 375 00:23:36,825 --> 00:23:38,910 -Okay, I'm ready. -You sure? 376 00:23:39,119 --> 00:23:42,038 I've done my studying, and I know my stuff. 377 00:23:42,288 --> 00:23:44,415 All right, then. 378 00:23:45,834 --> 00:23:48,711 Rachel Green, let's play Bamboozled! 379 00:23:49,337 --> 00:23:52,090 How do you test the temperature of the baby's bath water? 380 00:23:52,298 --> 00:23:54,384 -Put your elbow in it. -Excellent! 381 00:23:54,592 --> 00:23:58,763 -How do you put a baby down for a nap? -Full, dry, on its back, no loose covers. 382 00:23:58,972 --> 00:24:00,181 Correct! 383 00:24:00,348 --> 00:24:03,393 There's a hopping bonus here, but I don't suggest you take it. 384 00:24:03,768 --> 00:24:04,978 Okay. 385 00:24:05,520 --> 00:24:11,151 This is an audio question. What do you do when a baby makes this sound: 386 00:24:14,529 --> 00:24:17,115 Check if it's wet or hungry, burp it. 387 00:24:17,323 --> 00:24:22,287 Excellent! Now do you want another question or a Wicked Wango Card? 388 00:24:22,495 --> 00:24:25,915 -A card! A card! I pick a card! -Oh, I'm sorry. 389 00:24:26,082 --> 00:24:31,296 You've been Bamboozled! You're gonna be a terrible mother! 390 00:24:33,256 --> 00:24:35,967 I've lost sight of why we're doing this! 391 00:24:38,469 --> 00:24:40,638 Please don't walk away. 392 00:24:42,015 --> 00:24:44,017 I've gone too far.