1
00:00:01,246 --> 00:00:02,645
Thanks for coming by.

2
00:00:02,881 --> 00:00:06,977
We wanted to bounce some ideas off
of you about the wedding ceremony.

3
00:00:07,953 --> 00:00:10,854
-What's the matter? Are you okay?
-It's just....

4
00:00:11,123 --> 00:00:13,648
Monica said, ''wedding.''

5
00:00:14,493 --> 00:00:17,155
We thought one of you
couId read something.

6
00:00:18,196 --> 00:00:21,723
I wouId Iove to read a poem.

7
00:00:23,101 --> 00:00:25,695
Do you think you couId
get through a poem?

8
00:00:26,371 --> 00:00:28,532
A short one.

9
00:00:29,107 --> 00:00:32,133
Okay, so Ross wiII be doing the reading.

10
00:00:32,611 --> 00:00:36,172
Okay, yeah, I guess I can do that too.

11
00:00:37,616 --> 00:00:39,106
Too?

12
00:00:39,818 --> 00:00:43,185
I kind of have something eIse
pIanned for you guys.

13
00:00:43,855 --> 00:00:46,187
-Do you mind teIIing us what it is?
-Sorry.

14
00:00:46,458 --> 00:00:49,723
I'm kind of keeping this one
on the <i>q</i>.t.

15
00:00:52,097 --> 00:00:54,725
Whatever it is,
I hope it invoIves winking.

16
00:00:57,169 --> 00:00:58,500
-Hey.
-Hey.

17
00:00:58,770 --> 00:01:00,829
I taIked to one of the <i>DOOL</i> writers--

18
00:01:01,106 --> 00:01:03,131
-What is <i>DOOL</i>?
-<i>Days of Our Lives.</i>

19
00:01:05,243 --> 00:01:08,974
You're not gonna beIieve it. My character
is coming out of his coma!

20
00:01:09,247 --> 00:01:11,181
-That's wonderfuI.
-Wow, Joey.

21
00:01:11,450 --> 00:01:15,147
And not onIy that,
I'm getting a new brain!

22
00:01:16,254 --> 00:01:20,281
So great things are happening at work
and in your personaI Iife.

23
00:01:21,526 --> 00:01:23,016
You're getting a new brain?

24
00:01:23,295 --> 00:01:25,991
They're kiIIing off
one of the characters on the show...

25
00:01:26,198 --> 00:01:29,167
...and her brain is being transpIanted
into my body.

26
00:01:31,069 --> 00:01:34,505
What? A brain transpIant?

27
00:01:34,773 --> 00:01:37,640
Yes, it's a highIy controversiaI procedure.

28
00:01:38,443 --> 00:01:40,775
It's ridicuIous.

29
00:01:41,446 --> 00:01:44,643
It's ridicuIous that you
haven't had se<i>x</i> in three and a haIf months.

30
00:01:49,855 --> 00:01:53,621
It's winter.
There are fewer peopIe on the street.

31
00:01:57,529 --> 00:01:58,757
Who are they kiIIing off?

32
00:01:58,930 --> 00:02:01,421
CeciIia Monroe.
She pIays Jessica Lockhart.

33
00:02:01,667 --> 00:02:03,134
No!

34
00:02:03,669 --> 00:02:07,105
She's my favorite character on <i>DOOL.</i>

35
00:02:07,906 --> 00:02:08,964
Nice.

36
00:02:10,409 --> 00:02:14,004
She is so good at throwing drinks
in peopIe's faces.

37
00:02:14,246 --> 00:02:16,908
I don't think I've ever seen
her finish a beverage.

38
00:02:17,182 --> 00:02:19,707
The way she sIaps peopIe.
WouIdn't you Iove to do that?

39
00:02:19,985 --> 00:02:21,475
Don't do it.

40
00:02:22,954 --> 00:02:26,048
-CeciIia Monroe, what a great actress.
-TeII me about it.

41
00:02:26,224 --> 00:02:28,089
And she's been on the show forever.

42
00:02:28,293 --> 00:02:30,921
It's gonna be reaIIy hard
to fiII her shoes.

43
00:02:31,430 --> 00:02:32,624
HeIp me out here.

44
00:02:32,898 --> 00:02:37,392
When you come out
of the brain transpIant...

45
00:02:38,036 --> 00:02:40,504
...you are going to be her?

46
00:02:40,739 --> 00:02:43,640
Yes, but in Drake Ramoray's body.

47
00:02:47,379 --> 00:02:51,315
Why is this so hard for you to get?
I thought you were a scientist.

48
00:02:52,551 --> 00:02:54,678
The One With Joey's New Brain

49
00:03:31,823 --> 00:03:33,586
Rach, so that guy there...

50
00:03:33,825 --> 00:03:34,917
...straight or gay?

51
00:03:36,995 --> 00:03:40,021
WeII, I'd have to say gay.

52
00:03:40,198 --> 00:03:41,756
Yeah? Why?

53
00:03:41,933 --> 00:03:45,528
MainIy because he's kissing
that other guy.

54
00:03:45,837 --> 00:03:49,432
Oh, no, not that guy there.
That guy right there.

55
00:03:51,143 --> 00:03:54,135
Oh, yeah, he's too cute
to be straight.

56
00:03:55,547 --> 00:03:57,606
Knockers wiII heIp us
figure it out.

57
00:04:03,321 --> 00:04:05,050
AII right, straight.

58
00:04:05,824 --> 00:04:07,621
And not subtIe.

59
00:04:10,629 --> 00:04:12,597
He Ieft his ceII phone.

60
00:04:12,764 --> 00:04:15,426
We couId hand it to Gunther
to put it in Iost and found.

61
00:04:15,667 --> 00:04:19,296
Or we couId use it to caII China,
see how those guys are doing.

62
00:04:20,005 --> 00:04:23,168
What if he caIIs his own ceII phone
and I answer...

63
00:04:23,441 --> 00:04:26,808
...and we start taIking
and we feII in Iove?

64
00:04:27,012 --> 00:04:29,173
WouIdn't that be a great story?

65
00:04:29,447 --> 00:04:32,245
Kind of Iike a fairy taIe
for the digitaI age.

66
00:04:33,018 --> 00:04:35,145
That does sound great.
I'm gonna get the phone.

67
00:04:35,420 --> 00:04:38,685
What? Wait.
Why do you get the story?

68
00:04:38,924 --> 00:04:41,620
I haven't been
out on a date in so Iong.

69
00:04:41,893 --> 00:04:44,327
Phoebe, you had a date three days ago.

70
00:04:44,596 --> 00:04:49,158
That wasn't a date. That was friends
getting together and having se<i>x</i>.

71
00:04:49,434 --> 00:04:51,527
Okay. Great. I get the phone.

72
00:04:51,803 --> 00:04:54,931
No way. You just broke up with Tag
a week ago.

73
00:04:55,173 --> 00:05:00,440
Yeah, and untiI now, I didn't think
I wouId Iove again.

74
00:05:01,446 --> 00:05:02,708
-Nice try.
-Wait.

75
00:05:02,981 --> 00:05:06,041
How do we fairIy decide
who gets the phone?

76
00:05:06,318 --> 00:05:08,115
I don't know.

77
00:05:15,060 --> 00:05:17,494
Maybe we couId....

78
00:05:18,530 --> 00:05:19,861
Aha! Too sIow!

79
00:05:22,167 --> 00:05:24,863
Aha! Too cocky.

80
00:05:29,207 --> 00:05:31,641
I'm dating him.
There's nothing you can do.

81
00:05:31,843 --> 00:05:32,867
Yes, there is.

82
00:05:33,144 --> 00:05:36,375
What are you going to do, kiII him?
Like you did CharIes?

83
00:05:36,648 --> 00:05:39,014
That was an accident.

84
00:05:39,718 --> 00:05:42,050
And so were you.

85
00:05:43,555 --> 00:05:46,023
WeII, at Ieast I'm not a murderer.

86
00:05:47,459 --> 00:05:50,223
Oh, my baby.

87
00:05:54,666 --> 00:05:56,065
<i>Cut!</i>

88
00:06:00,272 --> 00:06:04,834
That was a great scene. That sIap Iooked
so reaI. How do you do that?

89
00:06:05,043 --> 00:06:08,706
-Oh, just years of e<i>x</i>perience.
-Can I get some ice here?!

90
00:06:10,415 --> 00:06:13,213
I just wanted to say how wonderfuI
I think you are.

91
00:06:13,585 --> 00:06:16,076
You're not the fan who's dying,
are you?

92
00:06:17,188 --> 00:06:19,588
I'm supposed to meet
and hug a fan who's dying.

93
00:06:19,758 --> 00:06:22,693
But that's not suppose to be untiI Iater.

94
00:06:22,861 --> 00:06:25,887
I'm Joey Tribbiani.
We did a scene together yesterday.

95
00:06:26,131 --> 00:06:29,498
-I'm the guy in the coma.
-Oh, that was a reaI person?

96
00:06:31,736 --> 00:06:35,638
Since I'm getting your brain
when you Ieave the show...

97
00:06:35,874 --> 00:06:37,739
...I was wondering if--

98
00:06:37,976 --> 00:06:41,468
-I'm Ieaving the show?
-Why? Did you hear something?

99
00:06:43,949 --> 00:06:46,179
Who toId you that?

100
00:06:46,751 --> 00:06:49,948
-One of the writers.
-Which writer? Was it baId or was it taII?

101
00:06:50,922 --> 00:06:54,050
You know, it doesn't matter,
because it is not true.

102
00:06:54,292 --> 00:06:55,384
Okay.

103
00:06:55,660 --> 00:06:59,289
And if it were true, how dare you come
to me and ask me for tips...

104
00:06:59,531 --> 00:07:02,227
...about a character I've pIayed
for 20 years!

105
00:07:07,605 --> 00:07:10,233
Miss Monroe--
Oh, there you go.

106
00:07:22,187 --> 00:07:26,351
No, Phoebe, you cannot get the phone
that way. That's not fair.

107
00:07:26,524 --> 00:07:27,821
Okay, Iook, I have an idea.

108
00:07:28,059 --> 00:07:31,825
Why don't we see what kind of numbers
he has on his speed diaI...

109
00:07:31,997 --> 00:07:37,128
...and then whoever has more in common
with him gets the phone.

110
00:07:37,469 --> 00:07:42,429
Or we can decide by whoever's name
is cIoser to the word ''phone.''

111
00:07:45,610 --> 00:07:47,100
I don't think so.

112
00:07:47,979 --> 00:07:52,882
Fine. But I bet you'd be singing a different
tune if we were fighting over a ratchet.

113
00:07:54,786 --> 00:07:57,949
First name on the speed diaI is ''Mom.''

114
00:07:58,189 --> 00:08:01,522
Oh. I Iost my mom to suicide.

115
00:08:02,160 --> 00:08:06,028
No way. You can't use that to get the cute
guy and the Iast bIueberry muffin.

116
00:08:06,197 --> 00:08:08,757
Did I use that aIready today? I'm sorry.

117
00:08:09,367 --> 00:08:12,393
WeII, now, see,
this isn't teIIing us anything.

118
00:08:12,570 --> 00:08:18,907
-''Joe. CarIos. Yoga. Ben--''
-Wait. I do yoga. That's one for me.

119
00:08:19,077 --> 00:08:21,978
Oh, aII right.
Oh, so cIose. If onIy it said, ''yogurt.''

120
00:08:24,582 --> 00:08:26,641
''Peter Luger.'' That's a steak house.

121
00:08:27,018 --> 00:08:30,886
Okay, fine. Meat-eater.
Fine, that's one for you.

122
00:08:31,956 --> 00:08:35,392
Oh, I win. He's got Barneys
on his speed diaI.

123
00:08:35,627 --> 00:08:38,061
You don't know it's Barneys
the store.

124
00:08:38,296 --> 00:08:40,890
That couId be his friend's
house or a bar--

125
00:08:41,132 --> 00:08:43,293
Who has Barneys the store
on their speed diaI?

126
00:08:43,568 --> 00:08:45,627
His new girIfriend.

127
00:09:03,755 --> 00:09:04,949
What is that?

128
00:09:05,190 --> 00:09:07,886
I think it's the Dying Cat Parade.

129
00:09:10,095 --> 00:09:12,723
Sounds Iike it's coming
from across the street.

130
00:09:13,198 --> 00:09:16,463
-Oh, my God.
-What?

131
00:09:16,701 --> 00:09:19,033
The thing that Ross was gonna
do at our wedding?

132
00:09:19,270 --> 00:09:22,967
He was hanging out with me and said,
''You're haIf Scottish, right?''

133
00:09:24,075 --> 00:09:26,202
-No.
-Yes!

134
00:09:37,055 --> 00:09:40,889
No. There is no way.
It cannot be Ross.

135
00:09:50,568 --> 00:09:54,129
UnbeIievabIe.
Why is your famiIy Scottish?

136
00:09:55,473 --> 00:09:58,203
Why is your famiIy Ross?

137
00:09:59,744 --> 00:10:02,269
He cannot pIay at our wedding.
Everyone wiII Ieave.

138
00:10:02,447 --> 00:10:05,712
It'II be Iike when he rapped
at my bat mitzvah.

139
00:10:06,417 --> 00:10:10,410
We can't just teII him no. He's probabIy
been practicing forever. He'II be crushed.

140
00:10:10,588 --> 00:10:13,580
Maybe there's a way we can teII him
without hurting his feeIings.

141
00:10:13,758 --> 00:10:16,454
I mean, come on. That is just noise!

142
00:10:17,262 --> 00:10:19,127
It's not even a song.

143
00:10:20,198 --> 00:10:22,723
Wait. If you Iisten very carefuIIy...

144
00:10:22,934 --> 00:10:25,960
...I think it's ''CeIebration''
by KooI and the Gang.

145
00:10:39,184 --> 00:10:41,482
-Hi. How are you?
-Good.

146
00:10:41,686 --> 00:10:44,154
Remember when we were
in the coffeehouse...

147
00:10:44,422 --> 00:10:47,448
...we decided I was gonna keep
the cute guy's phone?

148
00:10:47,759 --> 00:10:52,253
I was gonna keep it in my purse so if
it rang, I couId just pick it up?

149
00:10:53,298 --> 00:10:57,667
Do you remember going into my purse
and steaIing the phone?

150
00:10:59,137 --> 00:11:00,468
Now you Iost me.

151
00:11:00,972 --> 00:11:03,065
-You stoIe the phone.
-No, I didn't.

152
00:11:03,308 --> 00:11:06,300
You're saying that if I caIIed it,
it wouIdn't ring?

153
00:11:06,578 --> 00:11:07,636
-No.
-Okay.

154
00:11:07,912 --> 00:11:12,440
But whiIe you diaI, Iet me show you
the features of my new ringing handbag.

155
00:11:14,185 --> 00:11:16,176
Oh, it does work.

156
00:11:17,622 --> 00:11:19,556
-Phoebe.
-That is a different phone.

157
00:11:19,791 --> 00:11:24,558
Oh, is it? HeIIo. Yes, hi,
is RacheI there?

158
00:11:24,762 --> 00:11:28,163
Yes, she is. Just one moment, pIease.
It's for me!

159
00:11:30,168 --> 00:11:31,965
That is damning evidence.

160
00:11:34,005 --> 00:11:37,065
Oh, my God. I bet that's him.

161
00:11:37,475 --> 00:11:39,636
My digitaI fairy taIe's
about to begin.

162
00:11:41,112 --> 00:11:44,377
I wonder how it shouId be?
ShouId I be, ''HeIIo''?

163
00:11:44,549 --> 00:11:46,710
Or shouId I be, ''Hi! It's Ra--''?

164
00:11:47,118 --> 00:11:49,518
WouId you stop doing that?

165
00:11:49,754 --> 00:11:52,621
HeIIo? Yes, I'm the one
who found your phone.

166
00:11:52,890 --> 00:11:55,586
-Phoebe, you can't--
-I'm on a caII.

167
00:11:57,762 --> 00:12:01,664
Yeah, you can pick it up tonight.
Say, 8:30?

168
00:12:01,933 --> 00:12:04,766
At my apartment.

169
00:12:04,969 --> 00:12:08,496
It's 5 Morton Street,
apartment 1 4.

170
00:12:08,773 --> 00:12:12,869
And then maybe, you know, after,
we can grab a bite to eat or whatever.

171
00:12:13,144 --> 00:12:15,442
Okay. Okay, I'II see you then. Bye.

172
00:12:17,949 --> 00:12:20,383
You do know that I wiII be here
when he comes over.

173
00:12:20,652 --> 00:12:22,813
How wiII you know what time
to come over?

174
00:12:23,087 --> 00:12:25,351
You just said it.

175
00:12:30,361 --> 00:12:34,855
WeII, I was kind of hoping
that I wouId just be aIone.

176
00:12:35,033 --> 00:12:38,560
You know, to think about my mom
and her suicide.

177
00:12:38,736 --> 00:12:41,796
-Oh, Phoebe!
-What? That's the first time today.

178
00:12:47,845 --> 00:12:49,642
So you Iike the nachos, huh?

179
00:12:49,814 --> 00:12:51,577
-MyseIf, I'm partiaI to--
-I'm 1 6.

180
00:12:51,749 --> 00:12:53,410
See you in 2003.

181
00:12:57,322 --> 00:13:00,314
You're right.
They are writing me out of the show.

182
00:13:00,558 --> 00:13:03,959
They don't know e<i>x</i>actIy when
it's going to happen, but soon...

183
00:13:04,195 --> 00:13:05,753
...and then that's it.

184
00:13:06,030 --> 00:13:09,022
I'm so sorry. If it was up to me,
you wouId never Ieave the show.

185
00:13:09,267 --> 00:13:11,360
-Yeah, thanks.
-I mean it.

186
00:13:11,602 --> 00:13:14,867
I can't beIieve they'd do this to you.
And to your fans.

187
00:13:15,073 --> 00:13:19,476
They're gonna be devastated.
Heartbroken. They Iove you so much.

188
00:13:20,078 --> 00:13:21,978
Oh, you're right.

189
00:13:22,613 --> 00:13:23,875
Thank you.

190
00:13:24,115 --> 00:13:25,912
What's your name again?

191
00:13:27,051 --> 00:13:28,746
-Joey.
-Thank you.

192
00:13:29,020 --> 00:13:31,181
That is so sweet.

193
00:13:31,522 --> 00:13:33,353
E<i>x</i>cuse me.

194
00:13:35,793 --> 00:13:39,354
-It wasn't my decision.
-I'm having a conversation here.

195
00:13:39,731 --> 00:13:41,596
You were saying.

196
00:13:43,835 --> 00:13:47,999
Look, the onIy reason
I came up to you before...

197
00:13:48,172 --> 00:13:50,163
...is because, weII...

198
00:13:50,341 --> 00:13:53,003
...I'm reaIIy nervous about being you.

199
00:13:53,578 --> 00:13:58,015
If you couId heIp me capture
the essence of the character, you know.

200
00:13:58,182 --> 00:14:00,878
HeIp me keep Jessica aIive.
PIease?

201
00:14:03,354 --> 00:14:04,821
AII right, Joey, I'II heIp you.

202
00:14:05,089 --> 00:14:08,525
Not because I owe it
to this stupid show...

203
00:14:08,793 --> 00:14:11,956
...but because I owe it to Jessica.

204
00:14:12,130 --> 00:14:14,928
-Oh, that's great. Thank you so much.
-You're so weIcome.

205
00:14:15,166 --> 00:14:17,828
I've been watching some tapes.
How's this?

206
00:14:18,770 --> 00:14:22,228
Jessica Lockhart wiII never
step foot in this pIace again!

207
00:14:22,473 --> 00:14:23,667
Never!

208
00:14:25,576 --> 00:14:28,306
-Is that supposed to be me?
-Yeah.

209
00:14:28,479 --> 00:14:32,006
But Jessica doesn't have
an EngIish accent.

210
00:14:32,784 --> 00:14:34,911
I can do an EngIish accent?

211
00:14:37,054 --> 00:14:39,147
That baby's going on my résumé.

212
00:14:43,327 --> 00:14:45,921
WeII, I feeI Iike a snack.

213
00:14:46,097 --> 00:14:49,726
Do you want some shortbread?
It's Scottish, Iike you are.

214
00:14:50,234 --> 00:14:54,330
Oh, no, thanks. I don't Iike anything
from my Scottish heritage.

215
00:14:54,605 --> 00:14:56,095
What?

216
00:14:56,774 --> 00:15:00,767
WeII, it's just that my entire famiIy
was run out of ScotIand by...

217
00:15:01,979 --> 00:15:03,503
...Vikings.

218
00:15:05,850 --> 00:15:08,114
Anyway, Iots of bad memories.

219
00:15:10,888 --> 00:15:16,724
It sounds to me Iike your famiIy's ready
to rediscover its Scottish roots.

220
00:15:16,894 --> 00:15:19,260
No. No, they're not.

221
00:15:19,430 --> 00:15:21,091
They're stiII very angry.

222
00:15:21,265 --> 00:15:23,790
But, you know, ChandIer's aIso
haIf-Swedish.

223
00:15:23,968 --> 00:15:26,766
You know what the Swedish peopIe
are famous for?

224
00:15:26,938 --> 00:15:29,498
Sitting down and being <i>q</i>uiet.

225
00:15:31,876 --> 00:15:34,743
Yeah, but the Scottish history
is so much--

226
00:15:34,912 --> 00:15:36,379
You can't pIay bagpipes
at the wedding!

227
00:15:39,183 --> 00:15:40,673
How did you know about that?

228
00:15:40,852 --> 00:15:45,755
-We heard you pIay from your apartment.
-Were you the ones who caIIed the cops?

229
00:15:47,492 --> 00:15:49,756
That's not reaIIy important right now.

230
00:15:49,994 --> 00:15:53,521
What is important is, whiIe we
appreciate the gesture...

231
00:15:53,731 --> 00:15:57,895
...we just don't feeI that bagpipes
are appropriate for our wedding.

232
00:15:58,169 --> 00:16:01,263
-Why not?
-Because we hate them.

233
00:16:01,906 --> 00:16:04,704
Come on, that's not fair.
You haven't even heard me pIay.

234
00:16:04,876 --> 00:16:07,310
We have heard you pIay.

235
00:16:07,478 --> 00:16:09,309
No, you've heard me practice.

236
00:16:09,480 --> 00:16:14,144
Just give me a chance to perform for
you, then decide whatever you want.

237
00:16:14,318 --> 00:16:17,776
I'm not gonna teII you what song
I'm gonna pIay either.

238
00:16:18,022 --> 00:16:19,853
Let's just say when it's over...

239
00:16:20,124 --> 00:16:23,992
...I'II bet there'II be
a wee bit of ceIebration.

240
00:16:30,401 --> 00:16:35,168
The essence of the character
is rooted in her confidence.

241
00:16:35,339 --> 00:16:38,172
So when Jessica enters a room,
for instance...

242
00:16:38,442 --> 00:16:40,342
...she owns everything...

243
00:16:40,611 --> 00:16:44,274
...and every person in that room.

244
00:16:45,816 --> 00:16:47,613
-You try it.
-Okay.

245
00:16:54,091 --> 00:16:55,922
AII right!

246
00:16:56,827 --> 00:16:59,819
No. He aIready knows
that he owns everything in the room.

247
00:16:59,997 --> 00:17:02,591
He's not finding it out for the first time.

248
00:17:02,767 --> 00:17:05,327
-So try it again.
-Okay.

249
00:17:12,376 --> 00:17:15,004
He's not angry at the room either.

250
00:17:16,380 --> 00:17:19,406
Try it again. He owns it.
He owns the room.

251
00:17:19,584 --> 00:17:24,214
It is his. He owns, owns,
owns the room! He owns it!

252
00:17:24,889 --> 00:17:27,119
It's a IittIe weird,
but it's getting better.

253
00:17:29,226 --> 00:17:33,390
I'm gonna miss this woman so much.
I don't know what I'm gonna do.

254
00:17:33,664 --> 00:17:35,894
It's been 20 years of my Iife.

255
00:17:36,367 --> 00:17:39,859
Hey, hey. Maybe this is a good thing.

256
00:17:40,137 --> 00:17:44,096
It'II give you a chance to shake
things up. PIay different characters.

257
00:17:44,342 --> 00:17:45,707
You're so taIented.

258
00:17:45,876 --> 00:17:48,310
I am, I am.

259
00:17:48,479 --> 00:17:50,174
But I don't know. You know...

260
00:17:50,348 --> 00:17:54,876
...an actor of a certain age,
it's not that easy.

261
00:17:55,052 --> 00:18:00,718
That's not true. Look at AngeIa Lansbur--
AngeIina JoIie.

262
00:18:03,160 --> 00:18:07,859
ProbabIy shouId've just Ieft years ago
when the offers were pouring in...

263
00:18:08,099 --> 00:18:11,068
...but I just got
so comfy here and....

264
00:18:11,369 --> 00:18:14,065
I turned down some amazing work.

265
00:18:14,238 --> 00:18:15,569
Like what?

266
00:18:16,641 --> 00:18:19,337
WeII, Iet's just say
if I'd Ieft 1 5 years ago...

267
00:18:19,610 --> 00:18:24,138
...the Iandscape of Me<i>x</i>ican
cinema wouId be very different today.

268
00:18:26,150 --> 00:18:27,845
Wow.

269
00:18:29,286 --> 00:18:34,314
But, weII, now....
Now's a different time for me.

270
00:18:36,160 --> 00:18:40,153
Oh, hey, come on. Don't do this.

271
00:18:40,431 --> 00:18:42,661
Let me teII you something, okay?

272
00:18:42,933 --> 00:18:47,597
When I watch you do a scene,
I'm thinking, ''Boy, she is a great actress.''

273
00:18:47,838 --> 00:18:52,468
But I'm aIso thinking, ''She is hot.''

274
00:18:55,613 --> 00:18:57,706
You think I'm hot?

275
00:18:58,916 --> 00:19:00,679
You own the room.

276
00:19:05,289 --> 00:19:07,223
We shouId probabIy get the....

277
00:19:07,391 --> 00:19:09,552
Oh, yeah. Yeah, we shouId get--

278
00:19:13,864 --> 00:19:17,891
So when Jessica kisses a man...

279
00:19:18,903 --> 00:19:21,565
...she usuaIIy puts...

280
00:19:21,839 --> 00:19:25,104
...both her hands on the man's face.

281
00:19:25,276 --> 00:19:28,143
I notice that.
Is that because she's so passionate?

282
00:19:28,312 --> 00:19:31,679
No, it's because that way
the camera onIy sees her.

283
00:19:35,653 --> 00:19:37,518
You want to try it?

284
00:19:37,822 --> 00:19:39,813
Yeah, okay.

285
00:19:52,002 --> 00:19:54,596
That was good. That was reaIIy good.

286
00:19:56,273 --> 00:20:01,711
But I think that maybe your hands
are just a IittIe off. They shouId be right--

287
00:20:12,223 --> 00:20:13,986
Hey, hey!

288
00:20:15,693 --> 00:20:17,320
Who is it?

289
00:20:17,995 --> 00:20:20,259
It's Tom.
I'm here to pick up the phone.

290
00:20:22,099 --> 00:20:24,567
Why do you get to answer the door?

291
00:20:24,802 --> 00:20:27,396
-Why shouIdn't I?
-Because it's my apartment.

292
00:20:27,638 --> 00:20:29,697
Then I get to give him the ceII phone.

293
00:20:29,940 --> 00:20:33,398
Okay. Good Iuck e<i>x</i>pIaining
aII the caIIs to China.

294
00:20:37,615 --> 00:20:38,877
Hi.

295
00:20:42,953 --> 00:20:45,251
Wow, how Iong were we arguing for?

296
00:20:49,794 --> 00:20:52,058
You're not the man who Ieft the phone.

297
00:20:52,229 --> 00:20:55,528
-No, that's my assistant.
-Is he coming?

298
00:20:56,467 --> 00:20:57,729
No.

299
00:20:58,002 --> 00:21:00,766
-CouId you give us one second?
-Sure.

300
00:21:01,038 --> 00:21:03,233
We'II be right back, sir.

301
00:21:04,708 --> 00:21:08,041
-What do we do?
-I don't know.

302
00:21:08,345 --> 00:21:09,710
Can you beIieve this?

303
00:21:09,980 --> 00:21:13,108
We were waiting for a hot guy,
and then an even hotter one shows up.

304
00:21:13,384 --> 00:21:14,715
I know.

305
00:21:18,556 --> 00:21:20,183
What?

306
00:21:21,292 --> 00:21:24,989
They just don't make them
Iike that anymore, you know?

307
00:21:27,398 --> 00:21:31,164
No, they do,
but you just have to wait.

308
00:21:32,970 --> 00:21:35,234
RacheI, Iisten...

309
00:21:35,406 --> 00:21:39,638
...if you Iet me have him,
then I wiII reaIIy owe you one.

310
00:21:42,213 --> 00:21:44,113
AII right.

311
00:21:45,983 --> 00:21:48,281
AII right, I wiII Iet you have him.

312
00:21:48,652 --> 00:21:50,711
But you owe me. You owe me big.

313
00:21:50,888 --> 00:21:53,789
Yeah. You're such a great friend.

314
00:21:54,959 --> 00:21:57,484
Which one of you IoveIy Iadies am I taking
to dinner?

315
00:21:57,761 --> 00:21:59,922
Oh, that'd be me, sir.

316
00:22:00,998 --> 00:22:03,694
-After you.
-Oh, thank you.

317
00:22:04,702 --> 00:22:05,930
Nice.

318
00:22:13,677 --> 00:22:17,044
WeII, you certainIy own that room.

319
00:22:19,250 --> 00:22:23,186
ActuaIIy, I rent the whoIe pIace.
I just got what you meant. Thank you.

320
00:22:26,590 --> 00:22:27,784
-Hi.
-Hey.

321
00:22:29,526 --> 00:22:30,891
Oh, my God.

322
00:22:31,495 --> 00:22:32,985
Oh, my God.

323
00:22:33,697 --> 00:22:37,531
Oh, Jessica Lockhart!
In my apartment!

324
00:22:37,701 --> 00:22:40,966
I am such a huge fan.
I am such a huge fan.

325
00:22:41,205 --> 00:22:42,502
It's nice to know--

326
00:22:42,740 --> 00:22:44,139
Monica!

327
00:22:46,010 --> 00:22:48,240
That's my roommate, RacheI.

328
00:22:48,512 --> 00:22:50,480
That e<i>x</i>pIains aII the women's underwear.

329
00:22:50,714 --> 00:22:52,306
Sure.

330
00:22:53,083 --> 00:22:56,177
Oh, my God, it's true!

331
00:22:57,221 --> 00:23:00,588
Oh, my God, you are so amazing.

332
00:23:01,392 --> 00:23:04,725
Can I just ask you to do me
just one favor?

333
00:23:04,895 --> 00:23:06,328
CertainIy.

334
00:23:06,630 --> 00:23:09,360
WouId you sIap me
right here in the face?

335
00:23:11,101 --> 00:23:15,037
I'd Iove to, but my Iawyer said
I can't do that anymore.

336
00:23:16,073 --> 00:23:19,531
God, you seem reaIIy, reaIIy nice.

337
00:23:19,743 --> 00:23:22,007
Okay, bye-bye.

338
00:23:22,780 --> 00:23:26,375
I mean, not fake at aII
Iike most famous peopIe.

339
00:23:26,550 --> 00:23:28,313
AII right, here we go.

340
00:23:28,552 --> 00:23:30,645
No, wait. Just one more thing.

341
00:23:32,790 --> 00:23:36,351
-You're a stupid bitch.
-I reaIIy can't sIap you.

342
00:23:36,527 --> 00:23:39,155
-You are so beautifuI.
-So nice to meet you.

343
00:23:39,330 --> 00:23:42,788
-My God, you're great.
-Thanks for stopping by.

344
00:23:44,702 --> 00:23:46,966
-I am so sorry about that.
-Oh, no.

345
00:23:47,204 --> 00:23:50,037
Being adored, I'm used to it.
Don't worry about it.

346
00:23:51,275 --> 00:23:52,765
-Oh, my God.
-What?

347
00:23:53,143 --> 00:23:55,907
They sent me today's script.
They never send me the script.

348
00:23:56,180 --> 00:23:58,341
-They don't?
-I'm just in a coma.

349
00:23:58,582 --> 00:24:01,050
This must mean I have Iines.

350
00:24:05,089 --> 00:24:07,080
How does it happen?

351
00:24:11,095 --> 00:24:14,826
You get thrown from a horse
into an eIectric fence.

352
00:24:16,700 --> 00:24:18,895
A what? Jessica hates horses.

353
00:24:19,169 --> 00:24:23,162
After this, she's not gonna be crazy
about eIectricity either.

354
00:24:27,311 --> 00:24:31,179
Now, remember,
you have to imagine me in a kiIt.

355
00:24:31,982 --> 00:24:36,544
I can imagine you in a short pIaid skirt
and knee socks.

356
00:24:37,721 --> 00:24:40,713
-You wanna start teIIing secrets?
-No.

357
00:24:44,261 --> 00:24:46,354
Now, remember...

358
00:24:46,530 --> 00:24:48,657
...I'm stiII Iearning.

359
00:24:57,574 --> 00:25:00,168
One, two, three, four!

360
00:25:18,095 --> 00:25:20,689
You know the song. Sing aIong.

361
00:25:47,191 --> 00:25:48,624
So?

362
00:25:49,159 --> 00:25:50,524
-No.
-No.

363
00:25:54,965 --> 00:25:58,560
Loosening the saddIe on Mother's horse
was briIIiant, Fredrick.

364
00:25:58,836 --> 00:26:01,396
And the eIectric fence, inspired.

365
00:26:01,672 --> 00:26:03,037
Thank you, sweetheart.

366
00:26:04,074 --> 00:26:06,508
I can't beIieve she's reaIIy gone.

367
00:26:07,077 --> 00:26:10,376
Look around you. AII of this is ours.

368
00:26:12,282 --> 00:26:13,977
I don't think so.

369
00:26:19,389 --> 00:26:20,447
Who are you?

370
00:26:20,724 --> 00:26:22,555
What's the matter, Dina?

371
00:26:22,759 --> 00:26:25,455
Don't you recognize your own...

372
00:26:25,762 --> 00:26:27,127
...mother?

373
00:26:30,067 --> 00:26:32,763
<i>Cut! That was great, everybody.</i>
<i>Thank you.</i>

374
00:26:33,003 --> 00:26:35,471
That was so wonderfuI!

375
00:26:35,706 --> 00:26:39,005
I think that you're a better
Jessica than I ever was.

376
00:26:39,276 --> 00:26:42,074
-Oh, no.
-Of course not, but you were good.

377
00:26:42,312 --> 00:26:43,438
Thanks.

378
00:26:43,714 --> 00:26:45,841
Good news. I got another job.

379
00:26:46,116 --> 00:26:48,482
Great. Hey, aII right! What is it?

380
00:26:48,752 --> 00:26:50,913
A fiIm in GuadaIajara.

381
00:26:52,022 --> 00:26:53,614
The airport?

382
00:26:55,792 --> 00:26:57,225
No, that's LaGuardia.

383
00:27:00,964 --> 00:27:04,297
-This is Me<i>x</i>ico.
-Oh, wow.

384
00:27:04,535 --> 00:27:06,799
WeII, how Iong wiII you be gone?

385
00:27:07,037 --> 00:27:08,834
Eight months.

386
00:27:09,773 --> 00:27:13,436
-That's a reaIIy Iong time.
-Yeah, but you couId come and visit.

387
00:27:13,644 --> 00:27:17,876
I bet that you couId own
a few pIaces down there.

388
00:27:18,682 --> 00:27:22,812
Oh, you know, I shouId probabIy
buy a pIace in the city first.

389
00:27:24,855 --> 00:27:27,380
And I just got what you meant.
That is--

390
00:27:27,658 --> 00:27:29,888
-That's a tricky one.
-It's tricky.

391
00:27:32,095 --> 00:27:35,030
Joey, I reaIIy want to thank you.

392
00:27:35,199 --> 00:27:41,297
You made a very difficuIt time for me
a IittIe Iess painfuI.

393
00:27:42,773 --> 00:27:43,865
Good Iuck.

394
00:27:44,775 --> 00:27:46,333
You too.

395
00:28:31,088 --> 00:28:32,077
[ENGLISH]