1 00:00:04,571 --> 00:00:06,664 Hey! You're not gonna believe this. 2 00:00:06,840 --> 00:00:11,243 Yes, Ross, we know they have magazines with pictures of naked women in them. 3 00:00:11,411 --> 00:00:13,470 Don't tell him about the videos! 4 00:00:14,914 --> 00:00:17,644 I made up a joke and sent it in to Playboy. 5 00:00:17,917 --> 00:00:19,441 They printed it. 6 00:00:21,821 --> 00:00:23,812 I didn't know they print jokes. 7 00:00:24,057 --> 00:00:26,821 They print jokes, interviews, hard-hitting journalism. 8 00:00:27,027 --> 00:00:28,824 It's not just about the pictures. 9 00:00:29,062 --> 00:00:31,553 Didn't work on Mom, it's not gonna work on us. 10 00:00:32,599 --> 00:00:34,829 Check it out. It's the first one. 11 00:00:36,302 --> 00:00:37,599 Right there. 12 00:00:40,240 --> 00:00:41,468 That is funny. 13 00:00:41,741 --> 00:00:43,834 It was also funny when I made it up. 14 00:00:46,012 --> 00:00:47,980 -What? -I made that joke up. 15 00:00:48,181 --> 00:00:50,081 No, you didn't. I did. 16 00:00:50,283 --> 00:00:54,777 Yes, I did. I told Dan and he said it was the funniest joke he'd ever heard. 17 00:00:55,021 --> 00:00:57,012 Hey, tell Dan thanks. 18 00:01:01,528 --> 00:01:02,586 What? 19 00:01:02,796 --> 00:01:06,527 I was just reading the joke below it. Man, that one is funny. 20 00:01:08,968 --> 00:01:12,199 Monica, you remember me telling you that joke, right? 21 00:01:12,639 --> 00:01:14,266 -No. -Seriously? 22 00:01:14,707 --> 00:01:16,538 You tell a lot of jokes. 23 00:01:18,378 --> 00:01:19,538 Look, it's my joke. 24 00:01:19,813 --> 00:01:23,214 But if it makes you feel better, they don't print the name. 25 00:01:23,483 --> 00:01:25,883 So it doesn't really matter who gets credit. 26 00:01:26,119 --> 00:01:27,484 Yeah, I guess. 27 00:01:27,654 --> 00:01:30,020 -Hey, guys. -Playboy printed my joke! 28 00:01:30,223 --> 00:01:33,056 No, it's mine! Call them! They'll tell you! 29 00:01:33,326 --> 00:01:34,350 -My joke! -My joke! 30 00:01:34,661 --> 00:01:36,026 Whoa, whoa, whoa! 31 00:01:36,296 --> 00:01:38,093 Jokes? What...? 32 00:01:38,298 --> 00:01:40,858 You know there's naked chicks in there, right? 33 00:01:43,203 --> 00:01:45,296 The One With The Joke 34 00:02:21,274 --> 00:02:24,038 Dude! You have got to turn on Behind The Music. 35 00:02:24,277 --> 00:02:27,872 The band Heart is having a tough time and they may break up. 36 00:02:28,114 --> 00:02:30,082 Let's watch that at your place. 37 00:02:30,283 --> 00:02:33,719 Monica's watching a show. I don't want to miss when they were skinny. 38 00:02:34,387 --> 00:02:36,912 Hey, Chandler? You know what we should do? 39 00:02:37,223 --> 00:02:40,784 You and I should go out and get some new sunglasses. 40 00:02:41,161 --> 00:02:43,459 What? No, I want to watch this. 41 00:02:46,299 --> 00:02:49,996 -Did your cable go out? -No. No, that's VH1. 42 00:02:50,336 --> 00:02:53,100 I tell you, the music these kids listen to today... 43 00:02:53,306 --> 00:02:54,796 it's a lot of noise to me. 44 00:02:57,477 --> 00:02:58,739 Why is your cable out? 45 00:02:59,412 --> 00:03:02,575 Oh, because I haven't really paid the bill. 46 00:03:03,082 --> 00:03:06,279 If you need money, would you please let me loan you some? 47 00:03:06,586 --> 00:03:08,952 No, Chandler. Forget about it, okay? 48 00:03:09,189 --> 00:03:13,148 I know things have been tight since Janine moved out. God, was she hot. 49 00:03:13,960 --> 00:03:15,188 I know, yeah. 50 00:03:15,461 --> 00:03:19,420 Look, I can handle it, all right? I can listen to the radio. 51 00:03:19,632 --> 00:03:22,658 And Ross gave me this great book. 52 00:03:23,469 --> 00:03:27,098 Want to see if the joke stealer will let us watch at his place? 53 00:03:27,340 --> 00:03:28,602 Sure. 54 00:03:30,710 --> 00:03:32,177 -Paid your phone bill? -No. 55 00:03:42,355 --> 00:03:44,016 It's only you. 56 00:03:44,791 --> 00:03:47,385 -What are you doing? -Looking at a Playboy. 57 00:03:47,694 --> 00:03:48,786 I want to look too! 58 00:03:52,065 --> 00:03:53,396 Yikes! 59 00:03:55,001 --> 00:03:58,368 Do you think these pictures are trying to tell a story? 60 00:03:58,972 --> 00:04:01,634 Sure. Like in the case of this young woman... 61 00:04:01,908 --> 00:04:04,138 she has lost her clothes. 62 00:04:04,377 --> 00:04:09,371 So she rides naked on the horse, she's crying out, "Where are they?" 63 00:04:10,650 --> 00:04:14,017 She's not gonna find them, lying in the grass like that. 64 00:04:18,691 --> 00:04:21,216 Remember the days when you'd go out to the barn... 65 00:04:21,494 --> 00:04:23,587 Lift up your shirt and bend over? 66 00:04:27,767 --> 00:04:30,895 You see, now, I would date this girl. 67 00:04:31,104 --> 00:04:33,732 She's cute, she's outdoorsy. 68 00:04:34,040 --> 00:04:37,168 And she knows how to build a fire. That'll come in handy. 69 00:04:37,877 --> 00:04:38,901 I got a question. 70 00:04:39,279 --> 00:04:42,771 If you had to pick one of us to date, who would it be? 71 00:04:43,716 --> 00:04:45,343 -I don't know. -Me neither. 72 00:04:45,585 --> 00:04:46,950 Rachel. 73 00:04:48,087 --> 00:04:49,111 What? 74 00:04:50,723 --> 00:04:52,623 I don't know. 75 00:04:53,393 --> 00:04:54,690 Me neither. 76 00:04:58,531 --> 00:05:02,592 You know, you forget how many great songs Heart had. 77 00:05:04,370 --> 00:05:08,238 "Barracuda" was the first song I learned to play on the keyboard. 78 00:05:09,309 --> 00:05:11,971 So you heard it, you repeated it... 79 00:05:12,245 --> 00:05:14,941 so that must mean you wrote it. 80 00:05:16,983 --> 00:05:19,747 You guys with this joke. Well, I gotta say... 81 00:05:20,053 --> 00:05:22,783 I know I cracked up, but I'm not even sure I got it. 82 00:05:23,222 --> 00:05:24,450 What? 83 00:05:25,158 --> 00:05:26,455 You didn't get it? 84 00:05:26,659 --> 00:05:29,389 The doctor is a monkey. 85 00:05:30,496 --> 00:05:33,056 And monkeys can't write out prescriptions. 86 00:05:35,635 --> 00:05:38,263 You are not allowed to laugh at my joke. 87 00:05:39,172 --> 00:05:40,571 Your joke? 88 00:05:40,807 --> 00:05:43,674 Well, I think the Hef would disagree. 89 00:05:43,976 --> 00:05:46,274 Which is why he sent me a check... 90 00:05:46,479 --> 00:05:48,674 for $100. 91 00:05:48,915 --> 00:05:52,248 So you stole my joke and you stole my money? 92 00:05:52,585 --> 00:05:54,519 I was gonna stick it in the ATM. 93 00:05:54,787 --> 00:05:57,688 But now I think I'll show the sexy teller... 94 00:05:57,924 --> 00:06:00,757 that I am a published writer. 95 00:06:00,960 --> 00:06:03,155 She'll know that you stole the joke. 96 00:06:03,429 --> 00:06:04,919 You gonna follow me there? 97 00:06:05,131 --> 00:06:06,962 -Yeah. -I'm not gonna go now. 98 00:06:07,166 --> 00:06:08,497 Okay. 99 00:06:11,270 --> 00:06:12,669 Here you go. 100 00:06:15,808 --> 00:06:17,002 Gunther? 101 00:06:17,543 --> 00:06:20,011 I can't pay now, because I'm not working. 102 00:06:20,279 --> 00:06:22,873 I've had to cut down on some luxuries like... 103 00:06:23,116 --> 00:06:25,607 paying for stuff, so.... 104 00:06:27,286 --> 00:06:29,345 Well, if you want, you can work here. 105 00:06:30,189 --> 00:06:31,451 I don't know. 106 00:06:31,657 --> 00:06:32,954 It's just.... 107 00:06:33,393 --> 00:06:36,658 See, I was a regular on a soap opera, you know? 108 00:06:36,863 --> 00:06:39,798 And to go from that to this, it's just.... 109 00:06:40,066 --> 00:06:42,830 And plus, I'd have to wait on all my friends. 110 00:06:43,202 --> 00:06:44,829 Okay. But the money's good. 111 00:06:45,071 --> 00:06:47,904 Plus, you get to stare at Rachel as much as you want. 112 00:06:50,576 --> 00:06:51,873 What? 113 00:06:52,078 --> 00:06:54,171 Flexible hours. 114 00:06:55,415 --> 00:06:57,212 Maybe I could be a waiter. 115 00:06:57,483 --> 00:06:58,848 Could I use the phone? 116 00:07:06,192 --> 00:07:07,489 She picked Rachel. 117 00:07:07,693 --> 00:07:12,096 She tried to back out of it, but it was obvious. She picked Rachel. 118 00:07:12,598 --> 00:07:15,431 He took my joke. He just took it. 119 00:07:16,269 --> 00:07:18,931 This is wrong. You know what else is wrong? 120 00:07:19,172 --> 00:07:20,901 Phoebe picking Rachel. 121 00:07:21,174 --> 00:07:23,039 Know who else picked Rachel? Ross. 122 00:07:23,242 --> 00:07:26,109 Know what else Ross did? He stole my joke. 123 00:07:27,747 --> 00:07:30,113 I'm gonna get a joke journal, you know? 124 00:07:30,383 --> 00:07:33,784 And document the date and time of every single one of my jokes. 125 00:07:34,020 --> 00:07:36,284 Good idea. Know what's a bad idea? 126 00:07:36,556 --> 00:07:38,854 -Picking Rachel. -That's right. 127 00:07:41,594 --> 00:07:43,061 Did you hear something? 128 00:07:43,262 --> 00:07:47,392 Maybe it's the sound of Ross climbing into my brain to steal my thoughts. 129 00:07:48,100 --> 00:07:50,295 It's coming from the living room. 130 00:07:56,576 --> 00:07:57,770 I finished my book. 131 00:08:05,551 --> 00:08:07,985 -Hey, you guys. -Hey. 132 00:08:08,254 --> 00:08:10,279 Don't you guys look cute. 133 00:08:10,790 --> 00:08:12,451 You guys make a cute couple. 134 00:08:14,160 --> 00:08:15,593 What are you doing? 135 00:08:15,828 --> 00:08:19,889 Just trying to re-create some of the fun that we had at my place. 136 00:08:20,166 --> 00:08:22,430 Remember? When you picked Rachel over me? 137 00:08:22,635 --> 00:08:24,660 That was funny. 138 00:08:25,404 --> 00:08:27,998 -It was kind of funny. -It wasn't funny at all! 139 00:08:29,575 --> 00:08:31,167 Why would you do that? 140 00:08:31,444 --> 00:08:33,344 Why didn't you pick me? 141 00:08:33,613 --> 00:08:34,944 Fine. 142 00:08:35,281 --> 00:08:39,274 The reason I was leaning a little bit more toward Rachel than you... 143 00:08:39,485 --> 00:08:41,350 is just, you know, you're... 144 00:08:42,021 --> 00:08:44,148 high maintenance. Let's go to lunch! 145 00:08:44,423 --> 00:08:46,789 That is completely untrue. 146 00:08:47,026 --> 00:08:49,324 You think I'm high maintenance? Prove it. 147 00:08:49,629 --> 00:08:53,156 You write out a list, and we'll go through it point by point. 148 00:08:55,368 --> 00:08:57,461 No, you're right, you're easygoing. 149 00:08:59,338 --> 00:09:03,001 You're just not as easygoing as Rachel. She's just more... 150 00:09:03,276 --> 00:09:05,506 flexible and mellow. That's all. 151 00:09:08,948 --> 00:09:11,143 Well, people are different. 152 00:09:12,218 --> 00:09:16,279 Rachel will do whatever you want. You can just walk all over her. 153 00:09:17,390 --> 00:09:21,326 What? Are you saying that I'm a pushover? I'm not a pushover. 154 00:09:21,627 --> 00:09:24,721 Oh, okay. You're not a pushover. 155 00:09:26,299 --> 00:09:29,166 You think I'm a pushover. Well, watch this. 156 00:09:29,368 --> 00:09:31,233 You're not invited to lunch! 157 00:09:31,470 --> 00:09:33,961 What do you think? Pretty strong, I think. 158 00:09:34,240 --> 00:09:36,470 Come on, Monica, let's go to lunch. 159 00:09:38,678 --> 00:09:40,805 You start working on that list. 160 00:09:42,648 --> 00:09:46,243 -I cannot believe her. -I know. Where do you want to eat? 161 00:09:47,253 --> 00:09:51,053 -Oh, I love that Japanese place. -I'm sick of Japanese. Not there. 162 00:09:51,324 --> 00:09:53,724 Wherever you want to go is cool. 163 00:09:58,764 --> 00:10:00,026 Oh, hey, Gunther... 164 00:10:00,333 --> 00:10:01,857 check this out. 165 00:10:04,570 --> 00:10:07,061 Yeah, that Chandler cracks me up. 166 00:10:11,243 --> 00:10:14,235 You want anything to drink? I'm heading up there. 167 00:10:14,614 --> 00:10:16,844 -I'll take a coffee. Thanks. -Sure. 168 00:10:17,416 --> 00:10:18,678 -Coffee? -No. 169 00:10:18,918 --> 00:10:20,476 Coffee? I'm going up there. 170 00:10:20,686 --> 00:10:21,914 No, thank you. 171 00:10:23,422 --> 00:10:25,890 You need anything? I'm heading up there. 172 00:10:26,392 --> 00:10:27,689 I'd love ice water. 173 00:10:27,893 --> 00:10:29,383 You got it. 174 00:10:30,763 --> 00:10:32,094 What are you doing? 175 00:10:32,365 --> 00:10:33,730 Just being friendly. 176 00:10:35,935 --> 00:10:38,426 You're not supposed to go back there. 177 00:10:38,704 --> 00:10:40,069 It's okay. Right? 178 00:10:41,907 --> 00:10:43,568 Don't wink at me. 179 00:10:44,744 --> 00:10:46,712 And put on your apron. 180 00:10:48,648 --> 00:10:49,910 Okay. 181 00:10:50,149 --> 00:10:53,812 I don't see you asking other paying customers to put on aprons. 182 00:10:55,121 --> 00:10:57,885 -Joey, do you work here? -No. 183 00:10:58,090 --> 00:10:59,614 -Waiter. -Yeah! 184 00:11:02,995 --> 00:11:05,896 What's going on? Why didn't you tell us you work here? 185 00:11:09,402 --> 00:11:13,634 It's kind of embarrassing. I mean, I was an actor, now I'm a waiter. 186 00:11:13,839 --> 00:11:16,069 It's supposed to go the other direction. 187 00:11:16,742 --> 00:11:19,438 So's your apron. You're wearing it like a cape. 188 00:11:20,780 --> 00:11:23,908 I mean, the job's easy and the money's good, you know? 189 00:11:24,116 --> 00:11:28,075 I guess if I'm hanging out here, I might as well get paid for it. 190 00:11:28,287 --> 00:11:31,620 I just feel kind of weird serving you guys, you know? 191 00:11:31,824 --> 00:11:32,950 It'll be great. 192 00:11:33,259 --> 00:11:35,625 Come on, I did it and it was fine. 193 00:11:35,828 --> 00:11:37,386 Why would it be weird? 194 00:11:37,596 --> 00:11:40,588 Hey, Joey? Can I get some coffee? 195 00:11:41,734 --> 00:11:43,793 It doesn't seem that weird. 196 00:11:44,003 --> 00:11:46,733 I asked before. You still haven't gotten it. 197 00:11:48,441 --> 00:11:50,636 See, now it's weird again. 198 00:11:51,343 --> 00:11:54,779 You're gonna make a lot of money. Here's your first tip. 199 00:11:56,148 --> 00:11:58,343 Don't eat yellow snow. 200 00:12:00,853 --> 00:12:03,515 2:15, coffeehouse. 201 00:12:05,458 --> 00:12:08,621 This is great. Finally, someone I can pass my wisdom to. 202 00:12:08,861 --> 00:12:11,762 Let me tell you some things I learned working here. 203 00:12:12,998 --> 00:12:15,023 First, the customer is always right. 204 00:12:16,268 --> 00:12:18,759 A smile goes a long way. 205 00:12:20,506 --> 00:12:24,169 And if anyone is ever rude to you, sneeze muffin. 206 00:12:26,145 --> 00:12:27,203 Thanks, Rach. 207 00:12:29,014 --> 00:12:31,949 Hey, look, you guys are just terrific, you know? 208 00:12:32,184 --> 00:12:35,278 How about clearing out so I can get some new customers? 209 00:12:35,488 --> 00:12:37,547 It's all about turnover. 210 00:12:40,793 --> 00:12:42,727 Seriously, can I get my coffee? 211 00:12:44,296 --> 00:12:46,321 I'm sorry. I'll get it right now. 212 00:12:46,832 --> 00:12:49,665 And since you waited, I'll toss in a free muffin. 213 00:12:56,075 --> 00:12:58,066 Phoebe, we'd like to talk to you. 214 00:12:58,677 --> 00:12:59,905 Okay. 215 00:13:00,179 --> 00:13:03,239 So, maybe I am a little high maintenance. 216 00:13:03,516 --> 00:13:06,383 And maybe Rachel is a little bit of a pushover. 217 00:13:06,652 --> 00:13:08,313 But you know what you are? 218 00:13:08,554 --> 00:13:12,251 We are sorry to tell you this, but you, Phoebe, are flaky. 219 00:13:15,728 --> 00:13:17,559 That's true, I am flaky. 220 00:13:19,031 --> 00:13:22,660 So, what, you're just okay with being flaky? 221 00:13:22,902 --> 00:13:24,494 Yeah, totally. 222 00:13:25,371 --> 00:13:27,896 Then I'm okay with being high maintenance. 223 00:13:28,107 --> 00:13:31,008 Yeah. And I am okay with being a pushover. 224 00:13:31,410 --> 00:13:33,571 That's great. Good for you guys. 225 00:13:34,280 --> 00:13:37,010 -I am not high maintenance! -I am not a pushover! 226 00:13:38,517 --> 00:13:40,747 -Who said you were? -You did! 227 00:13:40,953 --> 00:13:43,387 I'm flaky. I'll say anything. 228 00:13:49,562 --> 00:13:50,859 Hey, Gunther. 229 00:13:51,063 --> 00:13:53,429 Can you cover for me? I got an audition. 230 00:13:53,766 --> 00:13:56,234 No, I'm leaving to get my hair dyed. 231 00:13:58,103 --> 00:13:59,934 I like your natural color. 232 00:14:02,474 --> 00:14:05,910 It's a great part. I'm the lead guy's best friend. 233 00:14:06,145 --> 00:14:08,477 I wait for him and save his seat. Listen. 234 00:14:09,481 --> 00:14:11,813 "I'm sorry, that seat's saved." 235 00:14:13,986 --> 00:14:18,082 -That's the whole part? -Maybe he's not his best friend. 236 00:14:18,424 --> 00:14:19,550 I'll see you. 237 00:14:20,893 --> 00:14:22,451 Oh, man. 238 00:14:22,661 --> 00:14:26,461 I could totally get that part. "I'm sorry, this seat is taken." 239 00:14:26,732 --> 00:14:29,997 -Excuse me. -No, I didn't mean you. 240 00:14:30,269 --> 00:14:31,566 But you believed me? 241 00:14:32,438 --> 00:14:35,601 I believed you were saving this seat for someone. 242 00:14:36,408 --> 00:14:37,966 So you'd hire me, right? 243 00:14:39,011 --> 00:14:40,842 For what? 244 00:14:41,413 --> 00:14:44,109 Exactly! All right, everybody listen up! 245 00:14:44,316 --> 00:14:47,080 The coffeehouse will be closed for about an hour. 246 00:14:47,353 --> 00:14:49,446 What? 247 00:14:49,922 --> 00:14:51,321 It's for the kids. 248 00:14:51,523 --> 00:14:54,287 Yeah, to keep the kids off drugs. 249 00:14:54,526 --> 00:14:58,121 It's a very important issue in this month's Playboy. 250 00:14:58,330 --> 00:15:00,195 I'm sure you all read about it. 251 00:15:03,369 --> 00:15:06,395 Hey! Don't you wanna keep guns away from kids? 252 00:15:06,572 --> 00:15:09,735 -You said, "drugs." -It's a vicious cycle. Get out! 253 00:15:12,578 --> 00:15:14,102 Go! 254 00:15:25,891 --> 00:15:28,121 -It's my joke. -It's my joke. 255 00:15:31,330 --> 00:15:33,161 It's my joke. 256 00:15:34,700 --> 00:15:36,998 I don't think we're gonna settle this. 257 00:15:38,170 --> 00:15:39,899 Let's have Monica decide. 258 00:15:40,572 --> 00:15:42,164 -Hey, Mon! -Get out here! 259 00:15:42,408 --> 00:15:44,376 -Monica? -Okay. 260 00:15:44,576 --> 00:15:46,908 You have to decide whose joke this is. 261 00:15:47,146 --> 00:15:48,170 Why do I have to? 262 00:15:48,380 --> 00:15:50,541 You're the only one that can be fair. 263 00:15:50,816 --> 00:15:52,681 I can't be. You're my boyfriend. 264 00:15:52,885 --> 00:15:55,012 But I'm your brother. We're family. 265 00:15:55,254 --> 00:15:59,054 That's the most important thing in the world. 266 00:16:01,060 --> 00:16:02,857 Don't try to sway her. 267 00:16:03,195 --> 00:16:06,096 I'm your only chance to have a baby. 268 00:16:09,935 --> 00:16:11,402 -Okay, let's go. -All right. 269 00:16:11,670 --> 00:16:15,265 We'll each tell you how we came up with the joke... 270 00:16:15,541 --> 00:16:19,500 then you decide which one of us is telling the truth. Me. 271 00:16:20,179 --> 00:16:21,407 Chandler, you first. 272 00:16:21,680 --> 00:16:25,047 I thought of the joke two months ago at lunch with Steve. 273 00:16:25,284 --> 00:16:27,775 -Did I meet him at Christmas? -Can I finish? 274 00:16:28,053 --> 00:16:29,520 You want me to pick you? 275 00:16:30,756 --> 00:16:34,055 See, I would never snap at you like that. 276 00:16:35,928 --> 00:16:38,419 Two babies. 277 00:16:42,368 --> 00:16:43,596 -Continue. -Okay. 278 00:16:43,802 --> 00:16:48,535 Steve said he had to go to the doctor. And his doctor's name is Dr. Mompey. 279 00:16:48,807 --> 00:16:53,801 I said, "Dr. Monkey?" And that is how the whole Dr. Monkey thing came up. 280 00:16:58,217 --> 00:16:59,775 Are you kidding? 281 00:17:00,486 --> 00:17:02,920 Okay, look, I study evolution. 282 00:17:03,155 --> 00:17:04,554 Remember? Evolution. 283 00:17:04,823 --> 00:17:06,381 Monkey into man. 284 00:17:06,625 --> 00:17:08,286 Plus, I'm a doctor. And... 285 00:17:08,560 --> 00:17:11,552 I had a monkey. 286 00:17:13,732 --> 00:17:15,632 I'm Dr. Monkey! 287 00:17:18,404 --> 00:17:20,736 I'm not arguing with that. 288 00:17:21,073 --> 00:17:23,098 I've heard enough for my decision. 289 00:17:23,342 --> 00:17:24,934 -Okay, so what..? -Do tell. 290 00:17:25,177 --> 00:17:27,407 You are both idiots. 291 00:17:29,014 --> 00:17:31,642 It's not funny. And it's offensive to women. 292 00:17:31,850 --> 00:17:33,977 And doctors. And monkeys. 293 00:17:35,454 --> 00:17:37,513 You shouldn't argue over who gets credit. 294 00:17:37,790 --> 00:17:42,659 You should argue over who gets blamed for inflicting this joke on the world. 295 00:17:42,928 --> 00:17:44,293 Now, let it go. 296 00:17:44,496 --> 00:17:46,657 The joke sucks. 297 00:17:52,304 --> 00:17:54,135 -It's your joke. -It is not. 298 00:18:09,555 --> 00:18:13,047 -Oh, my God, Chandler, there you are. -Hi. 299 00:18:13,792 --> 00:18:15,817 Hey, it's Phoebe and Rachel. 300 00:18:16,128 --> 00:18:17,459 Why don't you tell them... 301 00:18:17,663 --> 00:18:21,190 what you told me about me not being high maintenance. 302 00:18:24,002 --> 00:18:27,870 Monica is a self-sufficient, together lady. 303 00:18:29,708 --> 00:18:32,643 Being with her has been like being on a vacation. 304 00:18:35,147 --> 00:18:37,911 And what may be perceived as high maintenance... 305 00:18:38,217 --> 00:18:40,811 is merely attention to detail... 306 00:18:41,019 --> 00:18:42,384 and... 307 00:18:43,522 --> 00:18:45,820 generosity of spirit. 308 00:18:47,693 --> 00:18:52,392 Wow. You know what? That is the best fake speech I think I've ever heard. 309 00:18:52,664 --> 00:18:54,359 Really? I've heard better. 310 00:18:55,400 --> 00:18:58,494 Wait, he came up with that himself. Tell them. 311 00:18:59,771 --> 00:19:01,762 I'm out of words. Should I say it again? 312 00:19:02,074 --> 00:19:04,008 Look, I am not high maintenance! 313 00:19:04,276 --> 00:19:06,107 I am not. Chandler! 314 00:19:08,780 --> 00:19:10,839 You're a little high maintenance. 315 00:19:11,583 --> 00:19:13,244 You are on my list! 316 00:19:14,853 --> 00:19:16,844 Look, I'm sorry, but you're not.. 317 00:19:17,055 --> 00:19:19,853 You're not easygoing, but you're passionate. 318 00:19:20,092 --> 00:19:21,354 And that's good. 319 00:19:21,593 --> 00:19:25,461 And when you get upset about little things, I think I'm pretty good... 320 00:19:25,731 --> 00:19:27,562 at making you feel better. 321 00:19:27,799 --> 00:19:30,734 That's good too. They say you're high maintenance... 322 00:19:30,969 --> 00:19:33,597 but it's okay, because I like... 323 00:19:35,307 --> 00:19:37,298 maintaining you. 324 00:19:45,551 --> 00:19:47,041 I didn't tell him that. 325 00:19:51,290 --> 00:19:53,986 -You're off my list. -I'm off the list. 326 00:19:54,426 --> 00:19:55,654 Phoebe? 327 00:19:56,895 --> 00:20:00,058 It's okay that you don't want me to be your girlfriend. 328 00:20:00,299 --> 00:20:01,994 I have the best boyfriend. 329 00:20:03,435 --> 00:20:06,962 You know, suddenly I find you very attractive. 330 00:20:10,142 --> 00:20:11,632 How'd the audition go? 331 00:20:11,910 --> 00:20:13,275 Oh, not good. No. 332 00:20:13,478 --> 00:20:17,175 I didn't get the part. And I lost my job here, so... 333 00:20:17,416 --> 00:20:19,316 Wow, that is a bad audition. 334 00:20:21,520 --> 00:20:24,011 Well, how did you lose your job here? 335 00:20:24,289 --> 00:20:25,586 I had the audition... 336 00:20:25,791 --> 00:20:29,420 but Gunther said I had to stay so he could get his hair dyed. 337 00:20:29,661 --> 00:20:31,788 So I went anyway, and he fired me. 338 00:20:31,997 --> 00:20:34,932 He left work to do a personal errand... 339 00:20:35,133 --> 00:20:38,466 and left you in charge when you've been here two days? 340 00:20:38,704 --> 00:20:40,001 That's not right. 341 00:20:40,505 --> 00:20:42,405 What are you gonna do? 342 00:20:42,608 --> 00:20:45,304 You can't let him get away with that. 343 00:20:45,544 --> 00:20:48,672 I won't let him get away with that. I'm gonna say.. 344 00:20:48,947 --> 00:20:52,212 I shouldn't say anything. No, I should say something! 345 00:20:55,554 --> 00:20:58,648 Gunther? I want you to give Joey his job back. 346 00:20:58,957 --> 00:21:02,620 -It's not fair that you have to fire.. -Okay. 347 00:21:06,298 --> 00:21:08,732 -What? -He can have his job back. 348 00:21:10,235 --> 00:21:13,204 That's right, he can have his job back. 349 00:21:14,773 --> 00:21:17,207 Glad we got that all straightened out. 350 00:21:18,510 --> 00:21:19,875 There you go, Joey. 351 00:21:20,078 --> 00:21:23,514 -Got your job back. -That's great. Thanks. 352 00:21:23,749 --> 00:21:26,582 Pretty nice, huh? Now who's a pushover? 353 00:21:27,319 --> 00:21:29,514 -Rach, you're in my seat. -I'm sorry. 354 00:21:35,260 --> 00:21:37,854 I never heard who you'd pick to be your girlfriend. 355 00:21:38,030 --> 00:21:41,488 -I'd pick you, Phoebe. -Yeah, definitely you, Phoebe. 356 00:21:41,700 --> 00:21:43,292 Yeah, I kind of thought. 357 00:21:47,005 --> 00:21:49,633 -Never. -It would totally be you. 358 00:21:51,877 --> 00:21:55,210 If you had to pick one of the other two to go out with... 359 00:21:55,480 --> 00:21:56,913 who would you pick? 360 00:21:57,215 --> 00:21:58,546 -No way. -I'm not answering. 361 00:21:58,817 --> 00:22:00,307 Joey. 362 00:22:03,255 --> 00:22:05,815 No way, I'm not answering that.