﻿1
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Welcome, everybody!
Welcome to Amazing Discoveries!

2
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lt's on again!

3
00:00:11,924 --> 00:00:14,256
Guys, could we please
not watch this?

4
00:00:15,027 --> 00:00:18,292
This ever happen to you?
You go to get a glass of milk...

5
00:00:18,497 --> 00:00:21,796
...but these cartons are so
flinging, flanging hard to open!

6
00:00:22,000 --> 00:00:23,865
Boy, you said it, Mike.

7
00:00:26,538 --> 00:00:29,871
-There's gotta be a better way.
-There is, Kevin!

8
00:00:30,342 --> 00:00:33,641
-Can we please turn this off?
-No way, Kevin!

9
00:00:33,845 --> 00:00:37,440
What if I told you there's
a new product that guarantees...

10
00:00:37,683 --> 00:00:40,550
...you'll never have to open up
milk cartons again?

11
00:00:40,852 --> 00:00:43,047
Meet the Milkmaster 2000!

12
00:00:45,290 --> 00:00:47,952
-lntrigued?
-You're flinging, flanging right l am!

13
00:00:49,628 --> 00:00:54,156
This is the first time he's used this.
You'll see how easy this is to do.

14
00:00:55,067 --> 00:00:58,093
-This works in any milk carton.
-Wow, it is easy!

15
00:00:58,303 --> 00:01:00,703
Now I can have milk every day.

16
00:01:03,108 --> 00:01:05,201
l can't watch this anymore.

17
00:01:05,410 --> 00:01:08,004
You've suffered enough.
We'll change it.

18
00:01:08,213 --> 00:01:13,310
-How many times has this happened?
-There's gotta be a better way!

19
00:01:18,790 --> 00:01:21,156
The One With the Metaphorical Tunnel

20
00:02:04,169 --> 00:02:06,763
lt's official.
There are no good movies.

21
00:02:06,938 --> 00:02:09,771
So let's go to a bad one,
and make out.

22
00:02:13,612 --> 00:02:18,606
Perhaps you'd like me to turn so you
can bunny-bump against my back?

23
00:02:21,219 --> 00:02:24,313
-Hey, man. What's up?
-Maybe you can tell me.

24
00:02:24,523 --> 00:02:28,152
My agent wants to know why l didn't
show up at my audition today...

25
00:02:28,427 --> 00:02:31,760
...my first good one in weeks. How
could you not give me the message?

26
00:02:32,197 --> 00:02:34,859
l'll tell you, l do enjoy guilt...

27
00:02:35,434 --> 00:02:37,129
...but it wasn't me.

28
00:02:37,335 --> 00:02:39,997
Yes, it was.
lt was him!

29
00:02:41,006 --> 00:02:42,564
Okay, it was me!

30
00:02:44,609 --> 00:02:48,101
-How was it you?
-Well, it was all so crazy, you know?

31
00:02:48,346 --> 00:02:51,213
Chandler was in the closet,
counting to 1 0...

32
00:02:51,483 --> 00:02:54,646
...and l hadn't found a place
to hide yet.

33
00:02:54,886 --> 00:02:59,323
l meant to tell you, and l wrote it all
down on my hand. See? All of it.

34
00:02:59,791 --> 00:03:01,622
Yep, that's my audition.

35
00:03:01,827 --> 00:03:04,728
See? Now, this is why l keep
notepads everywhere.

36
00:03:04,930 --> 00:03:08,730
Yep. And that's why we don't
invite you to play.

37
00:03:08,934 --> 00:03:12,495
What is the great tragedy here?
Get yourself another appointment.

38
00:03:12,704 --> 00:03:16,697
Estelle tried. The casting director
told her l missed my chance.

39
00:03:16,908 --> 00:03:18,136
Well, that is unfair!

40
00:03:18,410 --> 00:03:21,004
l'll call her.
l'll tell her it was my fault.

41
00:03:21,213 --> 00:03:24,148
You can't. The casting director
doesn't talk to friends.

42
00:03:24,349 --> 00:03:27,614
-She only talks to agents.
-What a sad little life she must lead.

43
00:03:31,323 --> 00:03:34,156
-What are you doing?
-No, l know, l know.

44
00:03:35,494 --> 00:03:38,861
Hi, this is Caitlin
from Phoebe Buffay's office.

45
00:03:39,931 --> 00:03:42,559
ls Anne there for Phoebe?

46
00:03:43,001 --> 00:03:45,060
She'll know what it's about.

47
00:03:45,270 --> 00:03:46,760
Hang up. Hang up right--

48
00:03:48,774 --> 00:03:52,369
Annie? Hi. Listen, we've got
a problem with Joey Tribbiani.

49
00:03:52,577 --> 00:03:56,069
Apparently, he missed his audition.
Who did you speak to in my office?

50
00:03:56,348 --> 00:03:58,441
Estelle? l don't know
what to do with her.

51
00:03:58,683 --> 00:04:02,983
So your husband leaves and burns down
the apartment. The world doesn't stop.

52
00:04:04,189 --> 00:04:05,747
ls anybody else scared?

53
00:04:07,359 --> 00:04:11,261
lf Joey loses this audition, then
that is it for Estelle. l don't care!

54
00:04:12,264 --> 00:04:16,064
Annie, you are a doll. What time can
you see him? l need a pen. Pen!

55
00:04:23,041 --> 00:04:26,636
Get the woman a pad!
Get the woman a pad! A pad! A pad!

56
00:04:27,112 --> 00:04:29,808
Oh, now you want a pad.

57
00:04:37,322 --> 00:04:41,816
That's funny. Ugly Naked Guy's naked,
but his dog's wearing a sweater.

58
00:04:45,497 --> 00:04:46,657
Hey!

59
00:04:46,832 --> 00:04:48,766
Where's my boy?

60
00:04:48,934 --> 00:04:51,027
Here's my boy!

61
00:04:51,203 --> 00:04:55,230
And here's his Barbie!

62
00:05:00,212 --> 00:05:02,407
What's my boy doing with a Barbie?

63
00:05:03,348 --> 00:05:05,976
He picked it out at the store.
He loves it.

64
00:05:06,184 --> 00:05:08,709
He carries it everywhere,
like a security blanket.

65
00:05:09,020 --> 00:05:11,614
But with ski boots and a kicky beret.

66
00:05:12,991 --> 00:05:14,788
Yeah, it's cute.

67
00:05:14,993 --> 00:05:17,826
Why does he have it again?

68
00:05:18,063 --> 00:05:21,328
So he's got a doll. So what?

69
00:05:21,833 --> 00:05:25,325
Unless you're afraid
he's gonna grow up to be...

70
00:05:25,604 --> 00:05:27,367
...in show business.

71
00:05:27,873 --> 00:05:29,841
This wouldn't have
to do with the fact...

72
00:05:30,041 --> 00:05:32,066
...that he's being raised
by two women?

73
00:05:33,578 --> 00:05:38,641
You know what? lt's fine. lf you're
okay with the Barbie thing, so am l.

74
00:05:38,850 --> 00:05:42,115
Give Daddy the Barbie.
Give me the Barbie.

75
00:05:42,320 --> 00:05:45,687
Don't you wanna play
with a monster truck?

76
00:05:46,625 --> 00:05:47,922
No? Okay.

77
00:05:48,560 --> 00:05:52,257
How about a Dino-Soldier?

78
00:05:56,568 --> 00:05:58,092
You are so pathetic.

79
00:05:58,303 --> 00:06:01,864
Why can't your son
just play with his doll?

80
00:06:07,913 --> 00:06:09,540
l gotta go to work.

81
00:06:11,249 --> 00:06:13,080
Has anybody seen my left boob?

82
00:06:14,953 --> 00:06:17,387
l loved that movie.

83
00:06:20,725 --> 00:06:22,886
Here it is.
What are you doing?

84
00:06:23,495 --> 00:06:25,793
l'm sorry. lt just felt nice.

85
00:06:29,601 --> 00:06:30,795
Answer the phone.

86
00:06:31,236 --> 00:06:35,332
l only got one arm. You should
do stuff for me. Get me a sweater.

87
00:06:36,308 --> 00:06:37,832
Just do it! lt's Janice.

88
00:06:38,109 --> 00:06:41,044
And if l get it, l'll have
to see her tonight.

89
00:06:42,747 --> 00:06:45,272
That's great.
l'll have to see her tonight.

90
00:06:45,483 --> 00:06:47,747
Why don't you want to see Janice?

91
00:06:47,953 --> 00:06:49,921
Last night at dinner,
when the meals came...

92
00:06:50,155 --> 00:06:55,092
...she put half her chicken piccata
on my plate and took all my tomatoes.

93
00:06:56,828 --> 00:06:58,819
And that's bad...

94
00:06:59,130 --> 00:07:01,621
...because you hate chicken piccata?

95
00:07:03,435 --> 00:07:07,963
You didn't want to share your tomatoes.
Tomatoes are very important to you.

96
00:07:08,173 --> 00:07:09,936
Suddenly, we were this ''couple.''

97
00:07:10,141 --> 00:07:12,666
And this alarm started going off
in my head.

98
00:07:12,978 --> 00:07:15,310
''Run for your life!
Get out of the building!''

99
00:07:17,349 --> 00:07:21,479
Men are unbelievable. Janice thought
she was giving you chicken.

100
00:07:21,653 --> 00:07:24,918
She didn't think she was giving you
scary chicken.

101
00:07:25,123 --> 00:07:26,647
What is it with you people?

102
00:07:26,958 --> 00:07:29,756
The minute you feel something,
you have to run away?

103
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l know. That--

104
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That's why l don't want to go tonight.
l'm afraid l'll say something stupid.

105
00:07:38,303 --> 00:07:41,466
You mean that ''guy thing'' where
you act mean and distant...

106
00:07:41,673 --> 00:07:43,368
...until we break up with you?

107
00:07:43,575 --> 00:07:44,769
You know about that?

108
00:07:46,711 --> 00:07:48,338
What do l do?
l wanna get past this.

109
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l don't want to be afraid
of commitment.

110
00:07:51,116 --> 00:07:54,483
l want to go through the tunnel
to the other side!

111
00:07:55,320 --> 00:07:58,619
Where there's no fear of commitment.

112
00:07:59,090 --> 00:08:01,081
Do we have any--

113
00:08:04,996 --> 00:08:06,759
Do we have any thoughts here?

114
00:08:07,065 --> 00:08:09,863
l've never been through
the tunnel myself because...

115
00:08:10,135 --> 00:08:13,434
...you're not allowed through
with more than one girl in the car.

116
00:08:15,673 --> 00:08:20,076
But it seems to me it's pretty much
like anything else. Face your fear.

117
00:08:20,345 --> 00:08:23,246
Fear of heights?
Go to the top of the building.

118
00:08:23,481 --> 00:08:25,506
You're afraid of bugs.

119
00:08:25,817 --> 00:08:27,250
Get a bug.

120
00:08:30,055 --> 00:08:31,920
You have a fear of commitment.

121
00:08:32,157 --> 00:08:36,491
So l say you go in there and you be
the most committed guy there ever was!

122
00:08:36,694 --> 00:08:38,958
Amazingly, that makes sense.

123
00:08:39,731 --> 00:08:42,928
-Do you think?
-Oh, yeah! Go for it, man!

124
00:08:43,168 --> 00:08:44,260
Jump off the high dive!

125
00:08:44,536 --> 00:08:48,233
Stare down the barrel of the gun!
Pee into the wind!

126
00:08:49,941 --> 00:08:52,375
lf l'm staring down
the barrel of a gun...

127
00:08:52,577 --> 00:08:55,774
...l'm gonna be pretty much peeing
every which way.

128
00:09:00,285 --> 00:09:02,947
Listen to this and tell me
what you think.

129
00:09:05,957 --> 00:09:08,255
That's interesting.

130
00:09:09,427 --> 00:09:12,487
-Honey?
-Oh, because it's a beeper.

131
00:09:13,565 --> 00:09:17,467
lt's your audition from this morning!
Can l use the phone?

132
00:09:17,669 --> 00:09:22,572
Sure, that's what it's there for.
Emergencies and pretend agents.

133
00:09:23,074 --> 00:09:25,406
Come on, baby! Come on!

134
00:09:26,711 --> 00:09:29,874
Hi. l have Phoebe Buffay
returning a page.

135
00:09:30,081 --> 00:09:33,642
Okay, she's in her car.
l'll have to patch you through.

136
00:09:33,852 --> 00:09:35,513
Very nice touch.

137
00:09:36,721 --> 00:09:38,120
Okay, go ahead.

138
00:09:39,557 --> 00:09:41,582
Talk, talk, talk!

139
00:09:42,093 --> 00:09:43,617
Hi, Annie?

140
00:09:43,795 --> 00:09:45,285
Fantastic. You got it!

141
00:09:48,133 --> 00:09:52,797
Will he work for scale, you ask me?
Well, l don't know about that.

142
00:09:53,004 --> 00:09:55,199
Except that l do and he will.

143
00:09:55,573 --> 00:09:58,041
Great. Oh, you are such a sweetheart.

144
00:09:58,243 --> 00:10:03,647
l would love to have lunch with you!
How about we have lunch next--

145
00:10:03,848 --> 00:10:05,839
Went through a tunnel.

146
00:10:06,050 --> 00:10:07,210
Unbelievable.

147
00:10:07,452 --> 00:10:09,215
Oh, thank you so much!

148
00:10:09,721 --> 00:10:13,919
lt was really fun. l mean, l've never
talked on a car phone before.

149
00:10:14,759 --> 00:10:17,626
You are so amazing!
Could you do me this huge favor?

150
00:10:17,896 --> 00:10:21,263
There's another audition l want,
and Estelle couldn't get me in.

151
00:10:21,466 --> 00:10:23,957
l don't know.
lt was fun one time, but--

152
00:10:24,169 --> 00:10:26,660
Please? lt would just be
this one more.

153
00:10:26,971 --> 00:10:29,599
-Well, actually it's two.
-Two?

154
00:10:29,807 --> 00:10:35,746
Well, really it's three. Please?
You're so good at it. l love you.

155
00:10:36,314 --> 00:10:39,715
-Okay. But just these three, right?
-No, it's four.

156
00:10:44,155 --> 00:10:46,316
So how come you wanted
to eat in tonight?

157
00:10:46,925 --> 00:10:49,291
Because l wanted...

158
00:10:49,494 --> 00:10:51,485
...to give you this.

159
00:10:52,430 --> 00:10:56,025
Are you a puppy!

160
00:10:59,604 --> 00:11:01,071
Contact paper!

161
00:11:02,607 --> 00:11:05,542
What do you say when someone
you're sleeping with...

162
00:11:05,810 --> 00:11:07,368
...gives you contact paper?

163
00:11:08,046 --> 00:11:12,540
Wait, there's more.
See, the contact paper is to go...

164
00:11:12,817 --> 00:11:15,411
...in your brand new drawer!

165
00:11:17,522 --> 00:11:19,888
See, the drawer actually
goes in my dresser.

166
00:11:20,925 --> 00:11:25,123
-You didn't have to do this.
-Yes, l did.

167
00:11:25,296 --> 00:11:27,924
Yes, l did.
Because you're my girlfriend...

168
00:11:28,166 --> 00:11:31,067
...and that's what girlfriends
should get.

169
00:11:33,004 --> 00:11:35,529
Well, l gotta buy a vowel...

170
00:11:37,041 --> 00:11:40,841
...because, oh, my God!

171
00:11:41,112 --> 00:11:43,410
Who would've thought that someday...

172
00:11:43,581 --> 00:11:46,550
...Chandler Bing would buy me
a drawer?

173
00:11:47,785 --> 00:11:49,980
Well, not me.

174
00:11:50,755 --> 00:11:54,020
But that's what's happened.
And there's more.

175
00:11:56,060 --> 00:11:57,891
We should take a trip.

176
00:11:58,529 --> 00:11:59,518
We should?

177
00:11:59,797 --> 00:12:02,527
We're a couple,
and that's what couples do.

178
00:12:03,101 --> 00:12:05,069
And l wanna meet your parents.

179
00:12:05,270 --> 00:12:08,296
We should take a trip
with your parents!

180
00:12:12,277 --> 00:12:17,681
l don't think we need to because
you're tripping me out right now!

181
00:12:17,849 --> 00:12:20,181
-Are you okay?
-No, l am.

182
00:12:20,718 --> 00:12:22,618
l actually am! This is amazing.

183
00:12:22,887 --> 00:12:26,220
My entire life, l have feared
this place.

184
00:12:26,391 --> 00:12:29,690
And now that l'm here, it's like,
what was the big deal?

185
00:12:29,861 --> 00:12:33,262
l could probably say, ''Let's move in
together,'' and l'd be okay.

186
00:12:33,665 --> 00:12:36,065
You probably want us
to move in together?

187
00:12:37,235 --> 00:12:40,295
-lt doesn't scare me!
-Yeah, well it scares me!

188
00:12:40,571 --> 00:12:44,337
l'm not even divorced yet! You just
invited me over here for pasta...

189
00:12:44,609 --> 00:12:47,669
...and now you're talking
about moving in together.

190
00:12:47,945 --> 00:12:49,640
And l wasn't even that hungry.

191
00:12:49,981 --> 00:12:54,145
You know what? lt's getting really
late, and l should just--

192
00:12:54,352 --> 00:12:57,116
Don't go! l've scared you!
l've said too much!

193
00:12:57,322 --> 00:13:00,985
l'm hopeless and awkward
and desperate for love!

194
00:13:07,598 --> 00:13:09,463
Hey, Janice, it's me.

195
00:13:10,768 --> 00:13:15,296
l wanted to apologize in advance for
having chased you down the street.

196
00:13:24,015 --> 00:13:26,313
Here you go, honey. This will help.

197
00:13:27,118 --> 00:13:29,109
So l catch up to her
and she says...

198
00:13:29,354 --> 00:13:32,812
...this relationship's going too fast
and we have to slow down.

199
00:13:33,024 --> 00:13:34,821
That is never good.

200
00:13:35,026 --> 00:13:36,186
Then l got all...

201
00:13:37,161 --> 00:13:39,629
...needy and clingy.

202
00:13:40,264 --> 00:13:44,564
-You didn't beg, did you?
-l said please.

203
00:13:44,769 --> 00:13:48,762
Was it please with one E
in the middle or lots of E's?

204
00:13:49,273 --> 00:13:50,968
Oh, dear Lord, l begged.

205
00:13:51,876 --> 00:13:55,243
Wait a minute. Maybe it's
not so bad. How did you leave it?

206
00:13:55,446 --> 00:13:56,845
She said she'd call me.

207
00:13:59,617 --> 00:14:01,448
Oh, God.

208
00:14:01,619 --> 00:14:04,452
Welcome to our side of the tunnel.

209
00:14:04,889 --> 00:14:07,881
This ice cream tastes like crap,
by the way.

210
00:14:08,059 --> 00:14:11,620
Yeah, well, it's that
low-cal-nondairy-soymilk junk.

211
00:14:11,863 --> 00:14:14,331
We save the real stuff
for the truly terminal cases.

212
00:14:15,299 --> 00:14:18,757
When you're getting screwed over all
the time, you gotta switch to low fat.

213
00:14:18,970 --> 00:14:20,801
Yeah, you do.

214
00:14:21,672 --> 00:14:23,640
You don't think l'm terminal?

215
00:14:23,808 --> 00:14:28,108
Not at all. You're not terminal.
We just need some damage control.

216
00:14:28,312 --> 00:14:31,804
-Okay. Should l call her?
-No!

217
00:14:32,817 --> 00:14:36,719
Very critical time. lf you feel
yourself reaching for that phone...

218
00:14:36,954 --> 00:14:39,388
...go shopping, get your butt
in a bubble bath.

219
00:14:39,590 --> 00:14:43,185
lf you want her back,
you have got to start acting aloof.

220
00:14:43,895 --> 00:14:45,954
Aloof?

221
00:14:47,598 --> 00:14:50,032
She needs to know you're not needy.

222
00:14:50,234 --> 00:14:54,967
So what you have to do is accidentally
run into her on purpose...

223
00:14:55,139 --> 00:14:57,107
...and then act aloof.

224
00:14:58,209 --> 00:15:00,973
-And then l'll be okay?
-Yeah. l think so.

225
00:15:02,447 --> 00:15:04,438
So l'm not gonna lose her?

226
00:15:04,615 --> 00:15:07,743
Oh, honey, you're not a total loser.

227
00:15:10,988 --> 00:15:13,752
l said, ''So l'm not gonna lose her?''

228
00:15:21,199 --> 00:15:22,461
Guess who's here!

229
00:15:22,700 --> 00:15:25,669
lt's the toughest guy in Toyland, Ben!

230
00:15:25,837 --> 00:15:29,830
Real American hero
I'm G.I. Joe!

231
00:15:30,007 --> 00:15:32,373
Drop the Barbie. Drop the Barbie.

232
00:15:32,577 --> 00:15:36,138
G.l. Joe?
You really think he'll fall for that?

233
00:15:37,281 --> 00:15:40,773
G.l. Joe?
Cool! Can l play?

234
00:15:42,487 --> 00:15:46,116
Look, Ben! lt's a toy that protects
U.S. oil interests overseas!

235
00:15:46,290 --> 00:15:48,622
Go, Joe!

236
00:15:49,627 --> 00:15:50,992
Hello?

237
00:15:51,195 --> 00:15:53,390
-There you are!
-No, it's not. Sorry.

238
00:15:53,598 --> 00:15:56,260
But, Phoebe, wait, wait.
Phoebe!

239
00:15:56,434 --> 00:15:59,767
Oh, Joey! Oh, okay!
See, l didn't recognize you...

240
00:16:00,037 --> 00:16:01,368
...in those pants.

241
00:16:03,107 --> 00:16:06,907
That TV movie l went in for, did you
hear anything? l think l got a shot.

242
00:16:07,745 --> 00:16:09,975
Yes, they called!
You didn't get it!

243
00:16:10,715 --> 00:16:14,481
Okay? l mean, you didn't get it.
l'm sorry. l'm sorry.

244
00:16:14,785 --> 00:16:17,151
That's okay. These things happen.

245
00:16:17,421 --> 00:16:20,254
But they shouldn't happen.
You know what?

246
00:16:20,491 --> 00:16:23,119
You're in a terrible,
terrible business.

247
00:16:23,828 --> 00:16:27,457
l don't want to be the person
who makes you look like that.

248
00:16:27,665 --> 00:16:29,633
l'm okay. See?

249
00:16:31,469 --> 00:16:33,801
Now you're sad and creepy.

250
00:16:34,338 --> 00:16:35,896
l'm sorry. l quit.

251
00:16:36,641 --> 00:16:40,543
No, no, you can't quit!
You're the best agent l ever had.

252
00:16:40,745 --> 00:16:44,272
Rejection is part of being an actor.
You can't take it personal.

253
00:16:44,482 --> 00:16:48,976
They said they'd never met an ltalian
actor with a worse ltalian accent.

254
00:16:49,587 --> 00:16:51,179
They actually said that?

255
00:16:51,389 --> 00:16:55,348
Oh, God, there's that face again.
See? l can't do this job!

256
00:16:55,560 --> 00:16:59,087
This is why you have to do
this job! Agents always lie.

257
00:16:59,297 --> 00:17:02,266
Estelle just says stuff like,
''They went another way.''

258
00:17:02,500 --> 00:17:04,297
But this? l can use this.

259
00:17:04,502 --> 00:17:07,437
l can work on a new accent.

260
00:17:08,272 --> 00:17:11,605
Yeah, okay. lf it
helps you, okay. Yeah.

261
00:17:11,809 --> 00:17:15,472
You'll never get me, Joe!

262
00:17:28,159 --> 00:17:30,059
No, thank you.

263
00:17:31,929 --> 00:17:36,332
-Chandler!
-Hello, Janice.

264
00:17:38,569 --> 00:17:40,366
What are you doing here?

265
00:17:41,005 --> 00:17:42,700
Just a bit of shopping.

266
00:17:42,974 --> 00:17:44,305
How have you been?

267
00:17:45,876 --> 00:17:47,901
Are you being British?

268
00:17:50,214 --> 00:17:51,545
Not anymore.

269
00:17:52,683 --> 00:17:55,811
Why are you shopping here?
You don't live in this neighborhood.

270
00:17:56,153 --> 00:17:58,553
Were you here waiting for me?

271
00:18:02,360 --> 00:18:03,452
l'm just...

272
00:18:03,995 --> 00:18:06,657
...picking up some things for a party.

273
00:18:08,599 --> 00:18:09,691
Barley?

274
00:18:10,601 --> 00:18:12,694
What kind of party serves barley?

275
00:18:12,903 --> 00:18:15,997
l'm sorry if my friends aren't
as sophisticated as yours.

276
00:18:17,475 --> 00:18:20,000
-Where is this party?
-Here in Chelsea.

277
00:18:20,411 --> 00:18:21,878
Whose party is it?

278
00:18:22,079 --> 00:18:23,205
A woman's.

279
00:18:23,414 --> 00:18:24,472
What woman?

280
00:18:25,916 --> 00:18:28,077
Chelsea.

281
00:18:29,153 --> 00:18:32,350
Either you're seeing somebody
behind my back...

282
00:18:32,556 --> 00:18:35,252
...which would make you
the world's biggest jerk...

283
00:18:35,459 --> 00:18:37,757
...or you're pretending
to see somebody...

284
00:18:37,962 --> 00:18:41,523
...which makes you so pathetic
l could cry right here!

285
00:18:41,732 --> 00:18:45,224
So which of these two guys
do you want to be?

286
00:18:46,270 --> 00:18:48,033
Can l be that guy?

287
00:18:50,641 --> 00:18:55,510
Okay, we got some more good
rejections. Lots of stuff to work on.

288
00:18:55,980 --> 00:18:57,106
Okay. Shoot.

289
00:18:57,381 --> 00:19:00,942
-Okay. Oh, the zoo commercial.
-l didn't get it?

290
00:19:01,152 --> 00:19:05,680
No. They said that you
''weren't believable as a human being.''

291
00:19:06,590 --> 00:19:08,615
So you can work on that.

292
00:19:09,627 --> 00:19:10,616
Great.

293
00:19:11,095 --> 00:19:12,084
What else?

294
00:19:12,396 --> 00:19:16,264
The off-Broadway-play people said
that you were ''pretty but dumb.''

295
00:19:16,434 --> 00:19:19,460
Oh, no wait. l'm sorry.
That's ''pretty dumb.''

296
00:19:19,737 --> 00:19:21,932
Look, it's okay, no, no, no.
Really.

297
00:19:22,173 --> 00:19:23,231
Look...

298
00:19:23,641 --> 00:19:25,768
...l really appreciate this...

299
00:19:26,644 --> 00:19:28,908
...but l'm gonna have to
go back to Estelle.

300
00:19:29,780 --> 00:19:32,681
Don't get me wrong.
You're a better agent than she is...

301
00:19:32,983 --> 00:19:36,749
...but at least with her, l don't want
to blow my pretty dumb brains out.

302
00:19:37,955 --> 00:19:39,946
Yeah, no, l understand.

303
00:19:40,157 --> 00:19:41,624
You do? Thanks. Okay.

304
00:19:41,959 --> 00:19:42,948
Sorry.

305
00:19:46,797 --> 00:19:47,923
Wait a minute.

306
00:19:48,165 --> 00:19:49,427
Wait a minute.

307
00:19:49,667 --> 00:19:53,000
Did you make all that stuff up
to get out of being my agent?

308
00:19:53,270 --> 00:19:54,635
Oh, he caught me.

309
00:19:57,041 --> 00:19:58,770
l am so busted!

310
00:19:59,977 --> 00:20:02,138
That's what l suspected!

311
00:20:05,549 --> 00:20:07,608
And then l just, you know...

312
00:20:08,486 --> 00:20:11,785
...threw the bag of barley at her
and ran out of the store.

313
00:20:12,389 --> 00:20:16,155
My God, Chandler, we said be ''aloof,''
not ''a doof.''

314
00:20:17,828 --> 00:20:20,661
l've actually ruined this, haven't l?

315
00:20:22,233 --> 00:20:24,758
ls it time for the good ice cream now?

316
00:20:25,770 --> 00:20:27,465
-lt's time.
-Yeah, it is.

317
00:20:30,608 --> 00:20:33,304
Everything's gonna be okay.
You know why?

318
00:20:33,477 --> 00:20:37,777
Because you got 65 grams of fat
coming your way.

319
00:20:40,651 --> 00:20:43,279
Hello? Hi, Janice.

320
00:20:44,355 --> 00:20:47,085
Can you hold on for a second?
Okay.

321
00:20:47,291 --> 00:20:49,316
Okay. What do l do?

322
00:20:49,527 --> 00:20:51,495
l don't know.
This is unprecedented.

323
00:20:51,695 --> 00:20:54,323
lf we did what you did,
a man would never call.

324
00:20:55,099 --> 00:20:58,557
l got it! Pretend you just woke up.
That'll throw her off!

325
00:20:58,769 --> 00:21:01,101
-Be sleepy!
-Yes! And grumpy!

326
00:21:01,305 --> 00:21:03,933
What are you--?
Stop naming dwarfs!

327
00:21:06,677 --> 00:21:08,907
Hello, Janice? Hi.

328
00:21:09,079 --> 00:21:11,741
l'm so glad that you called.

329
00:21:12,950 --> 00:21:17,353
l know l've been acting
really weird lately...

330
00:21:18,689 --> 00:21:21,715
...and it's just because
l'm crazy about you...

331
00:21:24,528 --> 00:21:28,692
...and l just got stupid and scared...

332
00:21:28,899 --> 00:21:30,867
...and stupid a couple more times.

333
00:21:31,969 --> 00:21:32,958
And l'm sorry.

334
00:21:34,538 --> 00:21:35,527
Really?

335
00:21:37,641 --> 00:21:38,699
Really?

336
00:21:39,910 --> 00:21:42,037
He's so lucky.
lf Janice were a guy...

337
00:21:42,213 --> 00:21:45,444
...she'd be sleeping
with somebody else by now.

338
00:21:46,417 --> 00:21:47,782
l love you too.

339
00:21:48,152 --> 00:21:49,676
lt's so unfair!

340
00:21:57,728 --> 00:21:59,753
G.l. Joe? G.l. Joe?!

341
00:21:59,930 --> 00:22:04,026
l don't know what to tell you guys.
That's the doll he chose.

342
00:22:04,301 --> 00:22:06,826
What'd you do, dip it in sugar?

343
00:22:07,037 --> 00:22:09,232
Look, G.l. Joe's in, Barbie's out.

344
00:22:09,440 --> 00:22:13,433
And if you guys can't deal with it,
that's just your too bad.

345
00:22:14,945 --> 00:22:18,779
What are you being such a weenie for?
So he has a Barbie. Big deal.

346
00:22:19,016 --> 00:22:21,246
You used to dress up like a woman.

347
00:22:27,191 --> 00:22:29,022
What?

348
00:22:29,226 --> 00:22:31,592
The way you used to dress up
in Mom's clothes?

349
00:22:31,795 --> 00:22:33,524
What are you talking about?

350
00:22:33,764 --> 00:22:36,995
The big hat, the pearls,
the little pink handbag?

351
00:22:37,167 --> 00:22:39,635
Okay. You are totally
making this up.

352
00:22:40,004 --> 00:22:41,835
How can you not remember?

353
00:22:42,106 --> 00:22:44,040
You made us call you ''Bea''?

354
00:22:50,547 --> 00:22:52,640
Oh, God.

355
00:22:52,983 --> 00:22:56,441
l've literally never been this happy.

356
00:22:56,720 --> 00:22:58,847
Wasn't there a little song?

357
00:22:59,056 --> 00:23:01,456
Oh, please, God,
let there be a song.

358
00:23:01,659 --> 00:23:03,684
There was no song.
There was no song.

359
00:23:03,894 --> 00:23:05,418
-I am Bea
-Okay.

360
00:23:05,796 --> 00:23:07,457
-I drink tea--
-That's enough.

361
00:23:07,731 --> 00:23:09,130
Won't you...?

362
00:23:10,234 --> 00:23:11,565
Won't you...?

363
00:23:12,636 --> 00:23:14,069
Won't you...?

364
00:23:15,539 --> 00:23:18,133
Won't you dance around with me?

365
00:23:23,781 --> 00:23:26,306
I am Bea

366
00:23:26,483 --> 00:23:29,179
I drink tea

367
00:23:29,353 --> 00:23:34,814
Won't you dance around with--?

368
00:23:42,299 --> 00:23:43,288
Ross!

369
00:23:46,971 --> 00:23:47,960
[ENGLlSH]

