1
00:00:03,140 --> 00:00:05,370
All right, they got water,
orange juice. . .

2
00:00:05,740 --> 00:00:08,010
. . .and what looks like cider.

3
00:00:08,620 --> 00:00:09,500
Taste it.

4
00:00:14,420 --> 00:00:15,370
Yeah, it's fat.

5
00:00:15,620 --> 00:00:16,850
I drank fat!

6
00:00:18,540 --> 00:00:20,500
I know, I did that two minutes ago.

7
00:00:24,220 --> 00:00:25,620
Hey, Mr. Tux.

8
00:00:26,100 --> 00:00:28,330
-Why aren't you dressed?
-We have a half-hour.

9
00:00:28,580 --> 00:00:31,570
That was four minutes ago.
We have to be out the door at 7:40.

10
00:00:31,820 --> 00:00:35,180
Relax, we'll be ready. It takes us
two minutes to get dressed.

11
00:00:35,420 --> 00:00:37,490
I'd feel better if you
got dressed now.

12
00:00:37,980 --> 00:00:39,330
-Okay.
-Okay.

13
00:00:43,020 --> 00:00:44,980
Oh, look at you. All sexy.

14
00:00:45,220 --> 00:00:46,100
Really?

15
00:00:51,220 --> 00:00:55,900
-How come you didn't come over earlier?
-Because I' m a stupid, stupid man.

16
00:00:57,380 --> 00:00:59,050
Hey, Ross, want some cider?

17
00:00:59,300 --> 00:01:00,180
No.

18
00:01:01,620 --> 00:01:03,290
So you' re pretty close, huh?

19
00:01:03,500 --> 00:01:05,250
Makeup's on. Hair's done.

20
00:01:05,500 --> 00:01:06,820
I just have to get dressed.

21
00:01:07,060 --> 00:01:09,730
And that takes, what?
Just 6 or 7 minutes?

22
00:01:09,980 --> 00:01:12,250
Yeah. Once I figure out
what I' m wearing.

23
00:01:14,940 --> 00:01:16,050
Glass of fat?

24
00:01:17,780 --> 00:01:19,850
The One Where No One's Ready

25
00:01:21,140 --> 00:01:22,130
Subtitles and Rip by
.:staz:. (staz@post.cz)

26
00:02:04,420 --> 00:02:07,170
What's the matter?
You nervous about your speech?

27
00:02:07,420 --> 00:02:08,740
Nope.

28
00:02:10,220 --> 00:02:12,050
-You wanna hear it?
-Am I in it?

29
00:02:16,820 --> 00:02:19,570
After I thank everyone
for donating to the museum. . .

30
00:02:19,820 --> 00:02:22,460
. . .I sing a song about the wonder
that is Joey.

31
00:02:26,420 --> 00:02:27,930
Hello! You look great!

32
00:02:28,180 --> 00:02:30,250
Thank you. I know, though.

33
00:02:31,780 --> 00:02:35,450
You see this? This is a person
who is ready to go.

34
00:02:35,700 --> 00:02:36,810
Phoebe, you. . . .

35
00:02:37,300 --> 00:02:38,370
You are my star.

36
00:02:39,420 --> 00:02:41,570
Well, you' re my lucky penny.

37
00:02:44,420 --> 00:02:49,330
All right, I took the quiz. And it
turns out I do put career before men.

38
00:02:52,020 --> 00:02:52,900
Get up.

39
00:02:53,380 --> 00:02:54,180
What?

40
00:02:54,780 --> 00:02:57,210
-You' re in my seat.
-How is this your seat?

41
00:03:00,540 --> 00:03:01,730
I was sitting there.

42
00:03:01,940 --> 00:03:03,340
But then you left.

43
00:03:03,900 --> 00:03:06,330
Well, it's not like I went to Spain.

44
00:03:07,140 --> 00:03:09,370
I went to the bathroom.
You knew I'd be back.

45
00:03:09,620 --> 00:03:11,340
What's the big deal?
Sit somewhere else!

46
00:03:11,540 --> 00:03:14,930
The "big deal" is I was sitting
there last! So. . .

47
00:03:15,180 --> 00:03:16,410
. . .it's my seat.

48
00:03:16,940 --> 00:03:20,930
Well, actually, the last place
you were sitting was in there, so. . . .

49
00:03:21,420 --> 00:03:23,850
You guys, you know what?
It doesn't matter.

50
00:03:24,100 --> 00:03:28,460
You both have to go get dressed before
the big vein in my head pops.

51
00:03:28,700 --> 00:03:31,370
I just have to do one thing.
It's not a big deal.

52
00:03:31,620 --> 00:03:32,690
Get up!

53
00:03:35,620 --> 00:03:37,770
Phoebe, you look great!

54
00:03:38,380 --> 00:03:40,130
All right already.

55
00:03:41,020 --> 00:03:42,820
Are you gonna do magic?

56
00:03:45,220 --> 00:03:46,940
That's funny. Change.

57
00:03:47,140 --> 00:03:48,970
-Hang on, I just got in.
-I don't care.

58
00:03:49,220 --> 00:03:50,940
It starts at 8.
We can't be late.

59
00:03:51,180 --> 00:03:53,930
"He could not, would not,
want to wait. "

60
00:03:54,620 --> 00:03:57,260
Our table is down in front.
My boss will be there.

61
00:03:57,500 --> 00:03:59,770
Everyone will see if we arrive
after it starts.

62
00:04:00,020 --> 00:04:01,900
Has somebody been drinking my fat?

63
00:04:03,420 --> 00:04:07,010
Does this look like something a
paleontologist's girlfriend would wear?

64
00:04:07,260 --> 00:04:09,730
I don't know.
You might be the first one.

65
00:04:10,980 --> 00:04:13,100
-Rach, did you check the machine?
-No.

66
00:04:13,500 --> 00:04:17,250
Wait. This is the outfit that makes
my calves look fat. Never mind.

67
00:04:20,980 --> 00:04:23,730
Well, Joey, I wrote
a little song today.

68
00:04:24,180 --> 00:04:25,410
It's called, "Get up! "

69
00:04:26,620 --> 00:04:29,180
All right. You can have the chair.

70
00:04:29,380 --> 00:04:32,530
-Really?
-Oh, my. Would you look at that?

71
00:04:36,420 --> 00:04:37,850
It's me, I'm coming over.

72
00:04:38,100 --> 00:04:40,570
What if I'm already there
when you play this message?

73
00:04:40,820 --> 00:04:42,620
Is that too spooky?

74
00:04:44,580 --> 00:04:46,970
Hi, Rach, are you there?
It's me. Pick up.

75
00:04:47,420 --> 00:04:49,140
Rachel? Rach?

76
00:04:49,620 --> 00:04:50,770
What?

77
00:04:52,220 --> 00:04:53,100
Never mind.

78
00:04:55,500 --> 00:04:57,890
Monica, it's Richard. Call me.

79
00:05:01,420 --> 00:05:02,900
Is that message old or new?

80
00:05:04,340 --> 00:05:05,850
Old or new? Old or new?

81
00:05:06,100 --> 00:05:08,820
It's definitely old.
Didn't you hear the double beep?

82
00:05:09,060 --> 00:05:11,330
What if it's new?
We agreed not to talk.

83
00:05:11,540 --> 00:05:14,210
It could be important.
Shouldn't I call him back?

84
00:05:14,460 --> 00:05:16,730
Honey, you did call him back.
It's old.

85
00:05:16,940 --> 00:05:18,930
Yeah, see, Mon, listen. Listen.

86
00:05:19,140 --> 00:05:21,180
When Carol and I broke up. . .

87
00:05:21,420 --> 00:05:24,330
. . .I went through the same thing.
You know what I did?

88
00:05:24,540 --> 00:05:26,450
I got dressed.

89
00:05:28,940 --> 00:05:31,740
Really, really quickly, okay? Okay?

90
00:05:31,940 --> 00:05:33,900
There we go. There we go.

91
00:05:34,620 --> 00:05:36,970
You know what? Don't get up.
Just sit there.

92
00:05:37,220 --> 00:05:40,130
I just hope you don't mind
my hand right here.

93
00:05:41,380 --> 00:05:44,580
Not touching. Can't get mad!
Not touching. Can't get mad!

94
00:05:44,820 --> 00:05:46,860
Not touching. Can't get mad!

95
00:05:47,780 --> 00:05:49,370
Oh, my God!

96
00:05:49,820 --> 00:05:51,170
You rotten boys!

97
00:05:52,300 --> 00:05:54,450
-Sorry, Phoebe.
-What am I gonna do?

98
00:05:54,700 --> 00:05:56,450
Don't rub it!
What gets out hummus?

99
00:05:56,700 --> 00:05:58,290
What gets out hummus?

100
00:05:58,780 --> 00:06:00,740
Monica!
What gets out hummus?

101
00:06:01,740 --> 00:06:04,940
If it is a new message,
what is he calling to say?

102
00:06:05,740 --> 00:06:07,890
Okay, thanks. Yeah, I'll try that.

103
00:06:09,420 --> 00:06:11,540
Maybe he called to say
you' re obsessive and crazy?

104
00:06:11,780 --> 00:06:13,900
-So should I call him back?
-No!

105
00:06:15,220 --> 00:06:16,210
No!

106
00:06:18,220 --> 00:06:21,130
-Fine, we'll both sit in the chair.
-Fine with me.

107
00:06:24,820 --> 00:06:27,090
I am so comfortable.

108
00:06:28,300 --> 00:06:29,210
Me too.

109
00:06:29,580 --> 00:06:32,970
In fact, I think I might be
a little too comfortable.

110
00:06:36,980 --> 00:06:40,370
Okay, we have 1 9 minutes.
I want you to go and change.

111
00:06:40,620 --> 00:06:44,660
When you come back, Joey will go change
and he'll have vacated the chair.

112
00:06:45,020 --> 00:06:46,050
-Okay.
-All right.

113
00:06:46,300 --> 00:06:47,780
Fine. I' m going.

114
00:06:48,020 --> 00:06:51,410
When I get back, it's Chair City.
And I' m the guy. . .

115
00:06:51,620 --> 00:06:53,290
. . .who's sitting in a chair!

116
00:06:55,300 --> 00:06:56,570
Is this a little too--

117
00:06:56,820 --> 00:06:58,730
Pheebs? What happened?

118
00:06:58,940 --> 00:07:00,170
I got the hummus.

119
00:07:00,420 --> 00:07:04,210
Oh, honey, we'll find you something.
You wanna wear my black jacket?

120
00:07:04,420 --> 00:07:06,540
-It won't go with this dress.
-You' re right.

121
00:07:06,780 --> 00:07:10,980
-Well, let's just get you out of that.
-No, no, no. Not "out of that. "

122
00:07:11,180 --> 00:07:14,300
-Not "out" of clothes.
-Can Phoebe borrow your green dress?

123
00:07:14,500 --> 00:07:15,730
I called him.

124
00:07:16,540 --> 00:07:19,530
Yes. I got his machine
and I left a message.

125
00:07:19,780 --> 00:07:21,180
But it's okay. It's okay. . .

126
00:07:21,420 --> 00:07:24,460
. . .because it was, like,
a casual, breezy message.

127
00:07:24,700 --> 00:07:25,690
It was breezy.

128
00:07:26,580 --> 00:07:28,380
Oh, God, what if it wasn't breezy?

129
00:07:28,580 --> 00:07:32,780
How could it not be breezy? No.
Because you' re in such a breezy place.

130
00:07:33,500 --> 00:07:37,540
I got it. I'll play my message and
you guys tell me if it's breezy enough.

131
00:07:37,740 --> 00:07:39,730
But how you gonna do that?

132
00:07:40,340 --> 00:07:42,730
I know the code
to his answering machine.

133
00:07:42,940 --> 00:07:45,370
Okay, Mon, I really don't think
this is the--

134
00:07:45,620 --> 00:07:48,210
Okay, you' re dialing.
You are dialing.

135
00:07:57,980 --> 00:08:01,260
Hi, this is Richard.
Please leave a message at the tone.

136
00:08:02,820 --> 00:08:04,460
You have two new messages.

137
00:08:04,900 --> 00:08:06,250
What a cool job.

138
00:08:06,500 --> 00:08:08,380
"You have two new messages. "

139
00:08:10,180 --> 00:08:12,370
Please pass the pie.

140
00:08:14,620 --> 00:08:17,130
Hi, it's Monica.
I'm just checking in.

141
00:08:17,340 --> 00:08:20,460
I got a message and didn't know
if it was old or new.

142
00:08:20,700 --> 00:08:22,610
So I'm just checking.

143
00:08:22,820 --> 00:08:24,380
So let me know.

144
00:08:24,620 --> 00:08:25,940
Or don't. Whatever.

145
00:08:26,180 --> 00:08:27,660
I'm breezy!

146
00:08:29,020 --> 00:08:32,330
You can't say you' re "breezy. "
That negates the "breezy. "

147
00:08:34,500 --> 00:08:37,330
Hola. It's me.
Yesterday was really fun.

148
00:08:38,020 --> 00:08:40,170
Call me about this weekend, okay?

149
00:08:43,340 --> 00:08:44,900
Now, she sounded breezy.

150
00:08:48,740 --> 00:08:52,250
He's seeing someone.
I can't believe he's seeing someone.

151
00:08:52,500 --> 00:08:54,930
-You don't know that.
-Well, whose voice was that?

152
00:08:55,140 --> 00:08:58,020
Maybe it was his sister's.
Maybe it was his daughter's.

153
00:08:59,340 --> 00:09:02,490
Michelle. Of course!
Did it sound like Michelle?

154
00:09:03,100 --> 00:09:06,930
Oh, great. It's starting to rain.
That'll make it easier to get a cab.

155
00:09:07,900 --> 00:09:08,850
It was Michelle.

156
00:09:09,100 --> 00:09:10,740
It was definitely Michelle.

157
00:09:10,980 --> 00:09:14,970
Try Monica's green dress. If it
doesn't fit, wear my gray silk one.

158
00:09:15,220 --> 00:09:17,650
-Unless I wear it.
-You don't know what you' re wearing?

159
00:09:17,900 --> 00:09:20,370
I' m just trying to look nice
for your big night.

160
00:09:20,620 --> 00:09:23,180
Yeah, which we have to leave for
in 1 2 minutes.

161
00:09:23,420 --> 00:09:26,060
Come on, I'll just pick
something out for you.

162
00:09:26,300 --> 00:09:28,450
You'll notice that I' m fully dressed.

163
00:09:28,700 --> 00:09:31,930
I, in turn, have noticed
that you are not.

164
00:09:32,180 --> 00:09:36,780
So in the words of A.A. Milne,
"Get out of my chair, dill-hole. "

165
00:09:39,140 --> 00:09:40,460
Okay.

166
00:09:47,820 --> 00:09:50,330
-What are you doing?
-You said to give you the chair.

167
00:09:50,580 --> 00:09:52,540
You didn't say anything about cushions.

168
00:09:52,740 --> 00:09:54,380
They' re the essence
of the chair!

169
00:09:54,620 --> 00:09:57,130
That's right! I' m taking the essence.

170
00:09:58,180 --> 00:09:59,930
Oh, he'll be back.

171
00:10:00,140 --> 00:10:02,450
Oh, there's nobody in the room.

172
00:10:03,100 --> 00:10:06,570
-I' m sorry, I thought it looked pretty.
-That was a Halloween costume.

173
00:10:06,820 --> 00:10:09,970
Unless you would like me to go
as Little Bo Peep.

174
00:10:10,420 --> 00:10:13,060
I didn't recognize it
without that inflatable sheep.

175
00:10:13,300 --> 00:10:16,930
Yeah, which, by the way, Chandler,
I would like back one of these days.

176
00:10:19,460 --> 00:10:21,970
Rach, good! Listen, isn't this
perfect for me?

177
00:10:22,220 --> 00:10:24,450
Oh, it's perfect! But not for tonight.

178
00:10:24,700 --> 00:10:27,930
Of course, not for tonight.
Hi. I' m going to a benefit.

179
00:10:28,140 --> 00:10:30,130
Not for tonight?
What are you doing?

180
00:10:30,380 --> 00:10:33,580
No, I' m sorry. We didn't mean it.
I love you. Breathe.

181
00:10:34,900 --> 00:10:37,780
We used them as pillows
when we went camping.

182
00:10:37,980 --> 00:10:38,930
What?

183
00:10:39,900 --> 00:10:41,050
The sheep.

184
00:10:42,420 --> 00:10:45,090
Hey, what you do on your own time. . . .

185
00:10:48,620 --> 00:10:50,340
Where's my underwear?

186
00:10:51,140 --> 00:10:54,450
-Come on, you took his underwear?
-He took my essence!

187
00:10:54,700 --> 00:10:59,330
Okay, hold on. Why can't you just wear
the underwear you' re wearing now?

188
00:10:59,580 --> 00:11:02,090
Because I' m not wearing
any underwear now.

189
00:11:03,220 --> 00:11:05,530
Then why do you have
to wear underwear tonight?

190
00:11:05,780 --> 00:11:07,450
It's a rented tux, okay?

191
00:11:07,700 --> 00:11:10,850
I' m not gonna go commando
in another man's fatigues.

192
00:11:13,100 --> 00:11:16,380
Then somebody's gonna have
to give somebody back his cushions.

193
00:11:17,180 --> 00:11:21,170
Okay. You hide my clothes, I' m gonna
do the exact opposite to you.

194
00:11:23,420 --> 00:11:26,410
What, are you gonna show me my clothes?

195
00:11:26,660 --> 00:11:28,010
Hey, opposite. . .

196
00:11:28,980 --> 00:11:30,130
. . .is opposite.

197
00:11:31,940 --> 00:11:33,450
He's got nothing!

198
00:11:34,340 --> 00:11:35,820
Okay, I' m ready.

199
00:11:40,900 --> 00:11:43,940
Rachel didn't have anything I liked
but this ribbon.

200
00:11:44,140 --> 00:11:46,450
I thought, all right,
I'll be political.

201
00:11:48,180 --> 00:11:51,090
-What are you supporting?
-Christmas.

202
00:11:52,580 --> 00:11:57,330
Hey, that's okay with me. Two down,
and I have exactly 1 2 minutes--

203
00:11:57,820 --> 00:11:58,810
What?

204
00:11:59,820 --> 00:12:02,250
My watch stopped.
My watch. Okay, see. . .

205
00:12:02,500 --> 00:12:05,220
. . .the dinosaur tail
isn't going around anymore.

206
00:12:05,820 --> 00:12:08,330
What time is it? It's 7:33.
I have 7 minutes.

207
00:12:08,540 --> 00:12:09,650
I have seven minutes!

208
00:12:09,860 --> 00:12:12,740
Which shoes should I wear?
The black or the purple?

209
00:12:13,020 --> 00:12:15,330
-Just pick one, okay?
-Oh, okay, okay. The black.

210
00:12:15,540 --> 00:12:17,730
Do you have black
with little strappies?

211
00:12:17,980 --> 00:12:21,860
Yeah. But those go better with pants.
Maybe I should wear pants.

212
00:12:22,300 --> 00:12:26,740
Yeah, pants! What an idea!
Or better yet, go without pants.

213
00:12:26,980 --> 00:12:29,940
I don't know what you' re doing,
but just get in there. . .

214
00:12:30,180 --> 00:12:32,530
. . .and pick out any shoes
that fit your feet.

215
00:12:32,740 --> 00:12:36,050
I don't care if they match.
I don't care if they make. . .

216
00:12:36,300 --> 00:12:40,740
. . .your ankles or your knees or your
earlobes look fat. Just do it!

217
00:12:40,940 --> 00:12:43,500
Go in there, pick something out
so we can go.

218
00:12:46,180 --> 00:12:48,570
-All right.
-Thank you.

219
00:12:49,420 --> 00:12:52,930
I've got to call Michelle to see
if that was her voice.

220
00:12:53,140 --> 00:12:54,970
It was. It was her voice.

221
00:12:55,220 --> 00:12:58,130
Monica, I think you've gone over
to the bad place.

222
00:13:02,020 --> 00:13:03,740
Hola.

223
00:13:04,100 --> 00:13:06,290
Hello? Hello?

224
00:13:07,620 --> 00:13:10,580
-Okay. That was her, right?
-Definitely. Yeah.

225
00:13:10,820 --> 00:13:12,330
So there you go.

226
00:13:12,740 --> 00:13:15,940
We' re out of the woods.
I think I'll get dressed now.

227
00:13:17,420 --> 00:13:19,090
-I'll get it.
-Okay.

228
00:13:20,340 --> 00:13:21,740
Hi, Monica and Rachel's.

229
00:13:22,220 --> 00:13:25,130
Yeah, just a second.
Can I ask who's calling?

230
00:13:25,420 --> 00:13:26,650
It's Michelle!

231
00:13:28,780 --> 00:13:32,530
She must have that "caller l.D. " thing.
You should get that.

232
00:13:35,420 --> 00:13:36,450
Michelle?

233
00:13:36,900 --> 00:13:40,730
Yeah, that was me.
I dialed your number by mistake.

234
00:13:40,980 --> 00:13:42,050
Just try to be--

235
00:13:43,980 --> 00:13:45,330
You' re so sweet.

236
00:13:46,020 --> 00:13:47,980
Yeah, we were a great couple.

237
00:13:48,300 --> 00:13:50,100
I know, I really miss him.

238
00:13:50,620 --> 00:13:53,130
Well, you know how it is.
It's just that. . . .

239
00:13:53,340 --> 00:13:54,930
You know what's weird?

240
00:13:56,820 --> 00:13:58,810
Donald Duck never wore pants.

241
00:14:00,220 --> 00:14:01,970
But when he gets
out of the shower. . .

242
00:14:02,220 --> 00:14:04,690
. . .he always puts a towel
around his waist.

243
00:14:07,300 --> 00:14:09,450
I mean, what is that about?

244
00:14:11,020 --> 00:14:13,770
I only beeped in so I could
hear my own message.

245
00:14:14,020 --> 00:14:15,250
I mean, that's allowed.

246
00:14:17,940 --> 00:14:22,090
I would really appreciate it if you
wouldn't tell your dad about--

247
00:14:22,300 --> 00:14:26,530
What do you mean, you don't feel
comfortable with this? We' re friends!

248
00:14:27,700 --> 00:14:29,580
That bitch always hated me.

249
00:14:29,820 --> 00:14:31,140
I' m calling her back.

250
00:14:33,300 --> 00:14:34,970
-Okay, fine.
-Okay.

251
00:14:36,220 --> 00:14:39,420
-She's got a phone in there, right?
-Okay, we' re on it.

252
00:14:50,020 --> 00:14:53,530
I know it says "black tie optional" . . .

253
00:14:53,780 --> 00:14:56,340
. . .but this may be pushing it a little.

254
00:14:56,740 --> 00:14:58,300
I' m not gonna go.

255
00:15:00,380 --> 00:15:01,570
You' re not gonna go?

256
00:15:01,820 --> 00:15:05,330
No, I think I' m gonna catch up
on my correspondence.

257
00:15:06,740 --> 00:15:09,490
How can you not be going?

258
00:15:10,220 --> 00:15:11,450
I' m not gonna go.

259
00:15:11,700 --> 00:15:15,250
So I think that will accomplish
the "not going. "

260
00:15:19,980 --> 00:15:22,210
You know, just out of curiosity--

261
00:15:22,620 --> 00:15:25,770
Ever since I was humiliated
and yelled at in front of my friends. . .

262
00:15:26,020 --> 00:15:30,250
. . .I' m just, I don't know, not in a
very museum benefit-y kind of mood.

263
00:15:30,500 --> 00:15:34,330
Right. Well, okay. Okay.
God, I' m sorry. I' m sorry I yelled.

264
00:15:34,540 --> 00:15:36,660
-That's fine.
-No, but you' re mad.

265
00:15:36,900 --> 00:15:38,730
I' m not mad. I' m just not going.

266
00:15:38,940 --> 00:15:40,370
-Right.
-Okay.

267
00:15:41,620 --> 00:15:44,580
You know that I have to go, right?

268
00:15:44,820 --> 00:15:49,130
So is it gonna be, like,
I' m abandoning you while you' re upset?

269
00:15:49,340 --> 00:15:50,170
-No.
-No?

270
00:15:50,420 --> 00:15:54,330
-You' re not upset about the yelling.
-Right. And the humiliating.

271
00:15:54,540 --> 00:15:56,530
Well, of course, the humiliating.

272
00:15:58,540 --> 00:15:59,530
So we. . .

273
00:16:00,100 --> 00:16:01,170
. . .we' re okay?

274
00:16:01,420 --> 00:16:03,330
-We' re good.
-Right.

275
00:16:06,580 --> 00:16:08,730
-Honey? I love you.
-Yes, Ross.

276
00:16:10,140 --> 00:16:11,810
Get away from that phone!

277
00:16:14,420 --> 00:16:16,330
She's just getting dressed now.

278
00:16:19,380 --> 00:16:22,530
Is it wrong that I was
totally aroused by that?

279
00:16:30,100 --> 00:16:32,530
Okay, buddy boy, here it is.

280
00:16:32,940 --> 00:16:36,610
You hide my clothes,
I' m wearing everything you own.

281
00:16:37,140 --> 00:16:38,650
Oh, my God!

282
00:16:40,220 --> 00:16:43,770
That is so not the opposite
of taking somebody's underwear!

283
00:16:44,020 --> 00:16:45,530
Look at me! I' m Chandler.

284
00:16:45,740 --> 00:16:48,540
Could I be wearing any more clothes?

285
00:16:50,100 --> 00:16:52,290
Maybe if I wasn't going commando. . . .

286
00:16:57,220 --> 00:16:59,370
It's hot with all this stuff on.

287
00:16:59,620 --> 00:17:02,090
I better not do any,
I don't know, lunges.

288
00:17:04,700 --> 00:17:06,970
Okay, enough.
Enough with the lunging.

289
00:17:07,220 --> 00:17:09,730
I' m sick of this.
I've had it up to here.

290
00:17:09,940 --> 00:17:12,330
Neither of you can come to the party!

291
00:17:12,820 --> 00:17:14,250
Jeez, what a baby!

292
00:17:15,300 --> 00:17:17,810
Way to ruin it.
I was just gonna go get dressed.

293
00:17:18,060 --> 00:17:20,370
The only person
I cared about getting dressed. . .

294
00:17:20,620 --> 00:17:22,930
. . .is the person who's
not even gonna go.

295
00:17:23,180 --> 00:17:24,980
Look, Rach, I' m sorry, okay?

296
00:17:25,220 --> 00:17:29,130
Look, I was a jerk, okay?
I' m sorry I yelled. I want you there.

297
00:17:29,380 --> 00:17:30,570
I need you there.

298
00:17:32,220 --> 00:17:35,970
What can I do to show you
how much I want you to be there?

299
00:17:37,140 --> 00:17:38,940
You could drink the fat.

300
00:17:41,420 --> 00:17:43,930
Welcome to an adult conversation.

301
00:17:44,340 --> 00:17:46,530
No, no, no.
Now wait a minute. Wait a minute.

302
00:17:46,780 --> 00:17:50,290
-That actually sounds interesting.
-What?

303
00:17:50,580 --> 00:17:52,620
I think you should drink the fat.

304
00:17:58,740 --> 00:18:02,570
Okay, if that's what it takes to
show you how much you mean to me. . .

305
00:18:02,820 --> 00:18:05,380
. . .and how much I want you there,
that's what I'll do.

306
00:18:05,580 --> 00:18:08,330
Let me get you another glass.
That's been sitting out.

307
00:18:09,020 --> 00:18:10,930
I think this will be fine.

308
00:18:12,180 --> 00:18:14,980
Okay, vanilla milkshake.
Just a vanilla milkshake. . .

309
00:18:15,220 --> 00:18:17,940
. . .with chicken bits floating in it.

310
00:18:21,020 --> 00:18:22,210
Cheers.

311
00:18:22,420 --> 00:18:24,980
No, don't! Okay, okay, I'll go.
I'll go.

312
00:18:25,220 --> 00:18:26,290
You will?

313
00:18:27,180 --> 00:18:29,060
You were really gonna do that.

314
00:18:29,260 --> 00:18:30,060
Well, yeah.

315
00:18:31,100 --> 00:18:33,170
You were gonna drink the fat.

316
00:18:36,620 --> 00:18:38,530
Let's see what else he'll do!

317
00:18:40,300 --> 00:18:43,020
How about you get changed?
Give him his underwear.

318
00:18:43,220 --> 00:18:46,370
I'll get a cab. I want everyone
downstairs in two minutes.

319
00:18:46,580 --> 00:18:47,650
Monica!

320
00:18:48,300 --> 00:18:49,130
Stop it.

321
00:18:49,340 --> 00:18:50,490
Stop it!

322
00:18:54,780 --> 00:18:56,370
Ross went to get a cab, so we--

323
00:18:56,620 --> 00:18:59,130
What are you doing? No, Monica, no!

324
00:19:02,300 --> 00:19:03,700
Hi, this is Richard.

325
00:19:05,500 --> 00:19:07,930
You have three new messages.

326
00:19:08,940 --> 00:19:10,420
Not anymore.

327
00:19:11,140 --> 00:19:12,570
Message erased.

328
00:19:14,700 --> 00:19:18,850
To record your message,
begin speaking at the tone.

329
00:19:19,940 --> 00:19:21,850
Hi, Richard. It's Monica.

330
00:19:22,100 --> 00:19:24,930
Listen, I did something
kind of crazy tonight.

331
00:19:25,140 --> 00:19:27,940
Maybe I' m getting my period
or something. I don't know.

332
00:19:28,580 --> 00:19:32,050
Anyway, I beeped into your machine
and I heard this message. . .

333
00:19:32,300 --> 00:19:33,700
. . .that freaked me out. . .

334
00:19:34,300 --> 00:19:36,860
. . .and Michelle will tell you the rest.

335
00:19:37,100 --> 00:19:41,620
I' m sorry, okay? And I hope that we
can just forget the whole thing.

336
00:19:44,340 --> 00:19:47,850
Your outgoing message
has now been changed.

337
00:19:48,980 --> 00:19:49,860
Outgoing?

338
00:19:50,100 --> 00:19:51,330
Did that say outgoing?

339
00:19:51,540 --> 00:19:52,860
Not outgoing!

340
00:19:55,940 --> 00:19:57,770
Hi, Richard, it's Monica.

341
00:19:58,020 --> 00:20:00,820
Listen, I did something
kind of crazy tonight.

342
00:20:01,020 --> 00:20:03,610
Maybe I'm getting my period
or something. I don't know.

343
00:20:03,820 --> 00:20:06,170
-How did you do that?
-I don't know!

344
00:20:06,420 --> 00:20:08,410
Goodbye.

345
00:20:11,220 --> 00:20:15,340
Okay, I've got two cabs
and no people! Go, go, go!

346
00:20:15,540 --> 00:20:18,660
Maybe we can call the phone company
to change the message?

347
00:20:18,900 --> 00:20:20,130
They could change his number.

348
00:20:20,340 --> 00:20:23,330
I think after this,
he'll be doing that himself.

349
00:20:25,220 --> 00:20:26,020
Rachel!

350
00:20:31,820 --> 00:20:34,330
You. . . .
You look. . . .

351
00:20:36,740 --> 00:20:39,730
And I still have about
five seconds to spare.

352
00:20:45,620 --> 00:20:47,180
That was about 7 seconds.

353
00:20:47,380 --> 00:20:48,940
So we' re a little late.

354
00:20:49,140 --> 00:20:50,860
Come on.

355
00:20:51,820 --> 00:20:53,570
Oh, and by the way. . . .

356
00:20:53,820 --> 00:20:54,620
What?

357
00:20:55,180 --> 00:20:57,140
I' m going commando too.

358
00:21:07,820 --> 00:21:08,850
Dr. Geller?

359
00:21:09,140 --> 00:21:12,500
-Sherman Whitfield, London lnstitute.
-What a pleasure.

360
00:21:12,900 --> 00:21:17,370
I was quite impressed with your
paper on pre-Cretaceous fossils.

361
00:21:17,620 --> 00:21:19,770
Yes. It confirmed everything
I'd written.

362
00:21:20,020 --> 00:21:21,340
Excuse me.

363
00:21:21,580 --> 00:21:22,530
Hi.

364
00:21:23,100 --> 00:21:23,930
Yes?

365
00:21:24,380 --> 00:21:26,100
You' re kind of sitting in my seat.

366
00:21:27,420 --> 00:21:28,980
What do you mean, your seat?

367
00:21:29,540 --> 00:21:32,340
-I mean, I was sitting there.
-But you got up.

368
00:21:32,540 --> 00:21:34,580
But I never left the room.

369
00:21:35,300 --> 00:21:37,530
But you left the chair area.

370
00:21:39,020 --> 00:21:41,740
All right, that's it.
Give me your underwear.