1
00:00:04,049 --> 00:00:06,517
Hey, you guys.
Hey, what are you doing?

2
00:00:06,685 --> 00:00:10,280
- Figuring out our wedding plans.
- Funny. We were doing the same thing.

3
00:00:12,057 --> 00:00:16,187
It's really crazy.
The hall, the dress, the food.

4
00:00:16,361 --> 00:00:19,956
- I had no idea how expensive this was.
- Yeah, it is really pricey.

5
00:00:20,132 --> 00:00:23,465
- I freaked when I heard the numbers.
- So, what did you two do about it?

6
00:00:23,635 --> 00:00:26,798
It was simple. I came up with
some cost-cutting solutions...

7
00:00:26,972 --> 00:00:30,567
...wrote out a list,
and Monica told me to go to hell.

8
00:00:31,376 --> 00:00:35,437
There's no way around it. Just accept
that this is gonna cost a lot of money.

9
00:00:35,614 --> 00:00:39,072
I heard that weddings are, like,
a $40 billion-a-year industry.

10
00:00:39,251 --> 00:00:43,449
Yeah. And I'm responsible
for just, like, half of that.

11
00:00:43,789 --> 00:00:47,281
I don't know. It's a lot of money
to spend on one day.

12
00:00:47,459 --> 00:00:50,292
Hey, I've been married before,
I don't need a big wedding.

13
00:00:50,462 --> 00:00:53,727
All I ask is that you don't do ecstasy
and make out with my brother.

14
00:00:55,634 --> 00:00:59,001
But really, it does seem like
this money could be put to better use.

15
00:00:59,171 --> 00:01:01,639
Hey, you could buy a ton
of Amway products.

16
00:01:03,976 --> 00:01:07,776
- Or give it all to charity.
- Oh, that's great.

17
00:01:07,946 --> 00:01:12,144
How am I gonna unload
all those Amway products?

18
00:01:12,317 --> 00:01:13,375
Are you serious?

19
00:01:13,552 --> 00:01:17,113
Yeah. How would you feel if we gave
all the wedding money to charity...

20
00:01:17,289 --> 00:01:19,416
...and we just got married at City Hall?

21
00:01:19,591 --> 00:01:22,890
I think it would make me
wanna marry you even more.

22
00:01:24,630 --> 00:01:27,929
I gotta say, you guys,
that's an incredible gesture.

23
00:01:28,100 --> 00:01:31,092
Maybe you do that
next time you get married.

24
00:01:32,304 --> 00:01:36,434
No, no, no. The next time's
gonna be Hawaii at sunset.

25
00:01:36,608 --> 00:01:39,338
But maybe the time after that.

26
00:02:28,794 --> 00:02:31,319
- Hey. What's going on?
- Hey.

27
00:02:31,496 --> 00:02:35,125
Our adoption social worker is coming,
so we're cleaning the apartment.

28
00:02:35,300 --> 00:02:37,165
"We"?

29
00:02:37,703 --> 00:02:41,605
You know you don't want me to help.
You can't have it both ways.

30
00:02:43,041 --> 00:02:46,408
Is this the person who decides
whether or not you get a baby?

31
00:02:46,578 --> 00:02:49,775
- She's coming to see where we live.
- And it has to go perfectly.

32
00:02:49,948 --> 00:02:53,782
If she doesn't like us, she can keep
us off every adoption list in the state.

33
00:02:53,952 --> 00:02:57,547
Hey, maybe I should stop by.
She could be a soap opera fan.

34
00:02:57,723 --> 00:03:01,716
It's very impressive when
the little people know a celebrity.

35
00:03:01,893 --> 00:03:03,326
"Little people"?

36
00:03:03,495 --> 00:03:05,486
"Celebrity."

37
00:03:06,631 --> 00:03:08,394
So I think I'm just about done here.

38
00:03:08,567 --> 00:03:13,334
Unless you have any bad stuff hidden
somewhere, like porn or cigarettes?

39
00:03:13,505 --> 00:03:15,268
What?

40
00:03:16,374 --> 00:03:19,104
- No.
- Chandler.

41
00:03:21,580 --> 00:03:25,482
I don't, and I'm offended
by the insinuation.

42
00:03:25,650 --> 00:03:28,244
So there's not a magazine
under the couch...

43
00:03:28,420 --> 00:03:31,412
...or cigarettes taped to the back
of the toilet tank...

44
00:03:31,590 --> 00:03:34,150
...or a filthy video in the VCR?

45
00:03:35,160 --> 00:03:38,755
I'll admit to the cigarettes and magazine.
But that tape is not mine.

46
00:03:38,930 --> 00:03:42,991
- It isn't mine.
- I guess we'll never know whose it is.

47
00:03:50,776 --> 00:03:51,800
May I help you?

48
00:03:51,977 --> 00:03:55,572
Yes. We're here to make a rather
sizable donation to the children.

49
00:03:55,747 --> 00:03:58,341
Any contribution, large or small,
is appreciated.

50
00:03:58,517 --> 00:04:01,714
I think you're gonna appreciate
the crap out of this one.

51
00:04:01,887 --> 00:04:05,254
- Well, this is very generous.
- And we don't want any recognition.

52
00:04:05,423 --> 00:04:07,118
This is completely anonymous.

53
00:04:07,292 --> 00:04:09,886
Completely anonymous.
From two kind strangers.

54
00:04:10,061 --> 00:04:12,552
Mr. X and Phoebe Buffay.

55
00:04:14,199 --> 00:04:16,133
We can put your names
in our newsletter.

56
00:04:16,301 --> 00:04:19,236
- Not necessary.
- Buffay is spelled B-U-F-F-A-Y.

57
00:04:20,505 --> 00:04:24,669
And X is spelled "Mike Hannigan."

58
00:04:25,410 --> 00:04:29,642
Possible headline:
Attractive Couple Makes World Better.

59
00:04:30,215 --> 00:04:33,013
Well, on behalf of the children,
thank you both very much.

60
00:04:33,185 --> 00:04:37,485
- I'm glad we did this. It feels so good.
- It does. It feels really good.

61
00:04:37,656 --> 00:04:40,284
Oh, look. And we get these free T-shirts.

62
00:04:40,458 --> 00:04:43,655
Actually, that's the shirt
I wore to the gym.

63
00:04:44,029 --> 00:04:45,656
It's moist.

64
00:04:50,702 --> 00:04:53,398
- Hi. Emma will be up in a minute.
- Oh, good.

65
00:04:53,572 --> 00:04:58,032
Hey, Ross, listen. I heard about
you and Charlie. I'm really sorry.

66
00:04:58,210 --> 00:05:02,408
That's okay. I'm sure there are tons of
other beautiful paleontologists out there.

67
00:05:02,581 --> 00:05:05,379
- Absolutely.
- There was one. She's it.

68
00:05:05,550 --> 00:05:08,747
All the rest look like
they should live under a bridge.

69
00:05:11,423 --> 00:05:13,015
So, what are you gonna do today?

70
00:05:13,191 --> 00:05:15,489
I was thinking of taking Emma
to the playground.

71
00:05:15,794 --> 00:05:18,194
Oh, my God. What?

72
00:05:19,664 --> 00:05:24,363
Like I said, I was thinking of taking
Emma to the Museum of Knives and Fire.

73
00:05:26,905 --> 00:05:32,707
Okay, look, Ross. I do not want
Emma going to the playground.

74
00:05:35,881 --> 00:05:37,075
Because...?

75
00:05:37,249 --> 00:05:40,946
All right, if you must know,
I had a traumatic...

76
00:05:41,119 --> 00:05:44,782
...swing incident when I was little.

77
00:05:45,690 --> 00:05:47,624
- Seriously?
- Yes. I was 4 years old.

78
00:05:47,792 --> 00:05:49,623
And I was on the swing...

79
00:05:49,794 --> 00:05:53,628
...and then all of a sudden my hair
got tangled in the chain.

80
00:05:55,500 --> 00:06:00,403
And to get me out, my mom had
to cut a big chunk of my hair.

81
00:06:01,706 --> 00:06:04,766
And it was uneven for weeks.

82
00:06:10,482 --> 00:06:13,713
And you made it through that?

83
00:06:14,452 --> 00:06:17,979
I wonder who's gonna play you
in the movie.

84
00:06:18,924 --> 00:06:22,792
Okay, fine, you can make fun of me.
I do not want Emma going there.

85
00:06:22,961 --> 00:06:25,555
And I was thinking Claire Danes.

86
00:06:26,598 --> 00:06:29,032
Look, I'm sorry to hear
about your tragedy.

87
00:06:29,200 --> 00:06:32,966
But the swings are perfectly safe.
And besides, Emma loves them.

88
00:06:33,138 --> 00:06:38,166
- You should come, and you'll see.
- Those things go, like, 40 miles an hour.

89
00:06:38,343 --> 00:06:40,675
And there's that moment
when you're at the top...

90
00:06:40,845 --> 00:06:44,645
...when you just don't know
if you're gonna return back to Earth.

91
00:06:46,284 --> 00:06:49,219
Space is filled with orbiting children.

92
00:06:52,357 --> 00:06:54,518
Look, please, just come on.

93
00:06:54,693 --> 00:06:58,220
When you see the look on Emma's face,
I swear, you won't regret it.

94
00:07:00,899 --> 00:07:02,332
- All right.
- Good.

95
00:07:02,500 --> 00:07:07,403
You don't wanna be a mom who passes
her irrational fears to her children.

96
00:07:07,572 --> 00:07:09,039
"Irrational," huh?

97
00:07:09,207 --> 00:07:12,904
I'll remember that next time you freak
out about a spider in your apartment.

98
00:07:13,078 --> 00:07:17,344
That's the same. I'm sure there are 30
different species of poisonous swings.

99
00:07:21,653 --> 00:07:23,678
Oh, my God.
The adoption lady is early.

100
00:07:23,855 --> 00:07:27,188
Okay. Okay. Here we go.
Here we go.

101
00:07:27,359 --> 00:07:28,690
Stand up straight.

102
00:07:28,860 --> 00:07:30,725
Big smile.

103
00:07:33,231 --> 00:07:36,098
Hello. Is this the Creepy residence?

104
00:07:36,267 --> 00:07:39,703
We're waiting for the adoption lady.
But I'm glad you're here.

105
00:07:39,871 --> 00:07:42,396
I was cleaning this morning
and I found this.

106
00:07:42,574 --> 00:07:45,566
I don't know
if you wanna use it, but....

107
00:07:45,744 --> 00:07:48,838
Oh, this is so sweet of you.

108
00:07:49,014 --> 00:07:52,814
But I won't be needing a veil.
I actually won't be wearing a dress at all.

109
00:07:52,984 --> 00:07:56,010
I told you, I am not coming
to a naked wedding!

110
00:07:56,187 --> 00:07:58,451
No. We're not having a big reception.

111
00:07:58,623 --> 00:08:02,457
We took the wedding money
and donated it to a children's charity.

112
00:08:02,627 --> 00:08:04,288
That's crazy!

113
00:08:06,698 --> 00:08:10,361
- Generous.
- Crazy generous.

114
00:08:11,403 --> 00:08:15,601
I'm sorry. I can't imagine giving up
my one wedding day like that.

115
00:08:15,774 --> 00:08:19,107
Well, we're different.
I don't care about having a huge party.

116
00:08:19,277 --> 00:08:21,575
This is really nice for you, but....

117
00:08:21,746 --> 00:08:25,307
Oh, please. I put this on
and I just look like--

118
00:08:25,483 --> 00:08:27,678
Well, radiant.

119
00:08:29,721 --> 00:08:33,623
All right, but who cares? I don't need
a pretty veil and a fancy dress.

120
00:08:33,792 --> 00:08:35,987
That's right.
You're making a commitment.

121
00:08:36,161 --> 00:08:39,460
You know, that's the same
whether you do it at the Plaza or....

122
00:08:39,631 --> 00:08:41,531
- Where you gonna do it?
- City Hall.

123
00:08:43,435 --> 00:08:46,336
Oh, that sounds nice.

124
00:08:46,504 --> 00:08:50,736
I was just there for jury duty.
They've really spruced that place up.

125
00:08:50,909 --> 00:08:55,573
Okay. It's okay. It's okay. It's okay.
I've made my decision.

126
00:08:55,747 --> 00:08:58,477
What I really want
is a great big wedding.

127
00:09:00,785 --> 00:09:05,245
- But you gave all the money to charity.
- Well, I'll just ask for it back.

128
00:09:06,658 --> 00:09:08,888
- I don't think you can do that.
- Why not?

129
00:09:09,060 --> 00:09:13,360
This is her wedding day. That's way
more important than some stupid kids.

130
00:09:14,599 --> 00:09:18,035
That's sweet, honey, but save
something for the adoption lady.

131
00:09:24,642 --> 00:09:27,475
- All right, okay. Be careful.
- Okay.

132
00:09:27,645 --> 00:09:31,012
Careful. Watch her hair.
Watch her hair!

133
00:09:31,516 --> 00:09:34,849
- Rach, she's got, like, three hairs.
- I know. I know.

134
00:09:35,019 --> 00:09:40,218
But they're just so beautiful.
Oh, my God, I just pulled one out.

135
00:09:40,391 --> 00:09:44,054
I promise you she's safe.
Watch how much she loves this.

136
00:09:44,229 --> 00:09:47,790
- Okay. Okay.
- Are you ready, sweetie? Here we go.

137
00:09:48,800 --> 00:09:52,065
Okay, careful. Okay.

138
00:09:56,074 --> 00:09:58,065
She's smiling.

139
00:09:58,243 --> 00:10:00,541
Look at that, she does like it.

140
00:10:00,712 --> 00:10:02,543
See, I told you.

141
00:10:07,485 --> 00:10:11,319
Oh, my God. Look at her,
she's a little daredevil.

142
00:10:11,489 --> 00:10:15,892
- Oh, God. Let me push. Can I push?
- Oh, absolutely.

143
00:10:16,060 --> 00:10:19,518
Oh, God. Okay, get the camera.
It's in the diaper bag.

144
00:10:19,697 --> 00:10:21,289
Okay.

145
00:10:21,466 --> 00:10:25,129
See? Scared of the swings.
I bet you feel pretty silly.

146
00:10:30,408 --> 00:10:34,105
- We're asking for the money back?
- It's for our wedding day.

147
00:10:34,279 --> 00:10:38,477
Now, is this guy gay or straight?
Because one of us has to start flirting.

148
00:10:39,984 --> 00:10:42,145
You here to make another
donation the same day?

149
00:10:42,320 --> 00:10:44,254
I don't think that's ever
happened before.

150
00:10:44,422 --> 00:10:46,117
Gay. Go.

151
00:10:49,127 --> 00:10:52,062
Oh, my God, I love your shirt.

152
00:10:53,398 --> 00:10:57,960
The donation we made earlier?
Well, we want it back.

153
00:10:59,204 --> 00:11:00,262
Excuse me?

154
00:11:00,438 --> 00:11:04,033
Okay, that money was for a big wedding
we thought we didn't want.

155
00:11:04,209 --> 00:11:05,506
But it turns out we do.

156
00:11:05,677 --> 00:11:09,204
So you're asking us to refund
your donation to the children?

157
00:11:09,714 --> 00:11:11,147
Yeah.

158
00:11:12,450 --> 00:11:14,782
This feels really good.

159
00:11:18,022 --> 00:11:21,924
I'm sorry. I am. But this wedding's
just really important to me.

160
00:11:22,093 --> 00:11:25,756
Hey, it's none of my business.
Besides, this is probably a good thing.

161
00:11:25,930 --> 00:11:30,560
We've really been spoiling the children,
what with all the food and warm clothing.

162
00:11:31,236 --> 00:11:34,296
That's not fair.
A person's wedding is important.

163
00:11:34,472 --> 00:11:36,064
And especially to me.

164
00:11:36,241 --> 00:11:40,041
I didn't have a graduation party.
And I didn't go to prom.

165
00:11:40,211 --> 00:11:44,045
And I spent my sweet 16
being chased around a tire yard...

166
00:11:44,215 --> 00:11:47,844
...by an escaped mental patient who,
in his own words, wanted to:

167
00:11:48,019 --> 00:11:49,611
"Kill me, or whatever."

168
00:11:51,256 --> 00:11:54,191
So I deserve a real celebration.

169
00:11:54,359 --> 00:11:58,728
And I'm not gonna let some sweaty
little man make me feel badly about it.

170
00:12:03,201 --> 00:12:06,568
She could've been talking about
either one of us.

171
00:12:11,476 --> 00:12:14,309
Okay. Here we go.

172
00:12:17,015 --> 00:12:18,710
Good luck.

173
00:12:19,517 --> 00:12:21,451
Tongue, really?

174
00:12:24,689 --> 00:12:27,590
Hi, I'm Laura. I'm here
for your adoption interview.

175
00:12:27,759 --> 00:12:30,387
Hi, I'm Monica.
And this is Chandler.

176
00:12:30,561 --> 00:12:32,791
- Please come in.
- Thank you.

177
00:12:32,964 --> 00:12:36,092
- Would you like something to drink?
- Water would be fine.

178
00:12:36,267 --> 00:12:38,326
We're so glad that you're here.

179
00:12:38,503 --> 00:12:41,165
We're excited about
getting this process started.

180
00:12:41,339 --> 00:12:44,308
Because we love kids.
Love them to death.

181
00:12:44,475 --> 00:12:47,911
Well, not actually to death.
That's just a figure of speech.

182
00:12:48,079 --> 00:12:50,240
We love kids the appropriate amount...

183
00:12:51,949 --> 00:12:54,213
...as allowed by law.

184
00:12:56,054 --> 00:12:58,420
- Your place is just lovely.
- Thank you.

185
00:12:58,589 --> 00:13:02,525
Yes, this building does have
a wholesome, family feel to it.

186
00:13:02,694 --> 00:13:07,131
I feel like I've been here before. Any
other couples in the building adopting?

187
00:13:07,298 --> 00:13:11,667
Is that that couple on the first floor?
We should get a baby before them.

188
00:13:11,836 --> 00:13:13,736
That guy tried to sell me drugs.

189
00:13:15,373 --> 00:13:19,002
But other than that,
wholesome, wholesome building.

190
00:13:21,279 --> 00:13:24,771
- What?
- I realized why I remember this place.

191
00:13:24,949 --> 00:13:27,076
- Really? What is it?
- Oh, it's nothing.

192
00:13:27,251 --> 00:13:31,483
I went on a date with a guy who lived
in this building. It didn't end very well.

193
00:13:31,656 --> 00:13:34,648
That wouldn't, by any chance,
be Joey Tribbiani?

194
00:13:34,826 --> 00:13:37,818
- Yes!
- Of course it was.

195
00:13:38,629 --> 00:13:42,929
We had a great night. In the morning,
he promised he'd call and he didn't.

196
00:13:43,101 --> 00:13:44,625
Rat bastard!

197
00:13:46,637 --> 00:13:49,265
- So you're not friends with him?
- Oh, God, no.

198
00:13:49,440 --> 00:13:51,931
- No, no, no.
- No. Nope.

199
00:13:59,183 --> 00:14:01,515
Well, I'm sorry I brought it up.

200
00:14:01,686 --> 00:14:04,951
So are either one of you planning
on staying at home?

201
00:14:05,123 --> 00:14:10,083
Hello? Anybody in there
order a celebrity?

202
00:14:13,331 --> 00:14:14,423
What was that?

203
00:14:14,599 --> 00:14:18,228
That's just some crazy guy
who roams the halls here.

204
00:14:18,403 --> 00:14:20,303
He's great with kids, though.

205
00:14:26,577 --> 00:14:31,071
- Ross. Oh, my God, are you okay?
- Son of a bitch!

206
00:14:34,452 --> 00:14:37,250
Oh, relax. I didn't say the F-word.

207
00:14:39,524 --> 00:14:42,425
Ross, see, I told you!
Those swings are evil!

208
00:14:42,593 --> 00:14:47,428
That's the last time Emma is getting on
one of those things for her entire life.

209
00:14:47,598 --> 00:14:51,329
No, no, no. Okay, it wasn't
the swing's fault. It was my fault.

210
00:14:51,502 --> 00:14:54,369
And kind of that kid's fault.

211
00:14:54,539 --> 00:14:57,565
Who is still laughing. Nice.

212
00:14:57,742 --> 00:15:01,303
Come on. Can we just get out of here
before somebody else gets hurt?

213
00:15:01,479 --> 00:15:04,812
No. Wait. I have an idea.
I want you to get on the swing...

214
00:15:04,982 --> 00:15:08,281
...and you'll see that there's
nothing to be afraid of.

215
00:15:10,922 --> 00:15:13,447
I know what this is all about.

216
00:15:13,925 --> 00:15:17,292
You've always been jealous of my hair.

217
00:15:17,728 --> 00:15:21,824
I just think you're an adult, okay?
And you should get over your silly fears.

218
00:15:21,999 --> 00:15:24,160
- All right, fine. I'll do it.
- Good.

219
00:15:24,335 --> 00:15:27,429
- If you hold a spider.
- Where?! Where?!

220
00:15:28,072 --> 00:15:30,540
If you hold a spider.

221
00:15:30,708 --> 00:15:32,403
I know.

222
00:15:39,484 --> 00:15:42,851
Guys, is everything okay?
It's me, Joey.

223
00:15:45,056 --> 00:15:46,751
Adoption!

224
00:15:48,526 --> 00:15:49,823
What's going on?

225
00:15:49,994 --> 00:15:52,588
Oh, it's just like I said, that crazy...

226
00:15:52,763 --> 00:15:56,290
...Bert, roaming the halls.

227
00:15:56,467 --> 00:15:59,595
- Guys?
- Keep on roaming, Bert!

228
00:15:59,770 --> 00:16:02,637
We don't want any crazy today!

229
00:16:04,108 --> 00:16:06,076
Is he all right out there by himself?

230
00:16:06,244 --> 00:16:09,577
Oh, yeah. He has a caretaker.
His older brother...

231
00:16:09,747 --> 00:16:10,873
...Ernie.

232
00:16:13,518 --> 00:16:18,353
- Bert and Ernie?
- You can't make this stuff up.

233
00:16:19,590 --> 00:16:23,492
- What's going on?
- We'll talk later! Everything's fine!

234
00:16:24,228 --> 00:16:26,788
Everything doesn't sound fine.

235
00:16:36,107 --> 00:16:39,008
Bert and Ernie have a big yellow bird.

236
00:16:41,879 --> 00:16:45,076
You never told me about that guy
and your sweet 16.

237
00:16:45,249 --> 00:16:47,717
- I'm sorry about that.
- Oh, it ended okay.

238
00:16:47,885 --> 00:16:49,853
One of my friends shot him.

239
00:16:51,656 --> 00:16:55,183
At least you'll get a proper wedding.
You really deserve that.

240
00:16:55,359 --> 00:16:59,295
Yeah, I really do. You know,
I had nothing growing up.

241
00:17:01,766 --> 00:17:04,098
Just like the kids
I took the money from.

242
00:17:04,268 --> 00:17:09,103
No. No, no. I see where this is going.
Don't make me go back there.

243
00:17:09,273 --> 00:17:12,071
I'm sorry, but I want to regive the money
to the children.

244
00:17:12,243 --> 00:17:16,441
But we can't. I mean,
you called that guy a sweaty little man.

245
00:17:16,814 --> 00:17:19,840
Unless you were talking about me.
We never really cleared that up.

246
00:17:20,318 --> 00:17:24,414
Look, I can't have a wedding
with this money now. It's tainted.

247
00:17:25,523 --> 00:17:27,047
Fine, we'll give the money back.

248
00:17:27,224 --> 00:17:29,658
If that guy at the charity
gives us a hard time...

249
00:17:29,827 --> 00:17:33,160
...my friend hasn't shot anyone
in a really long time.

250
00:17:34,999 --> 00:17:38,491
I must say this seems like a lovely
environment to raise a child in.

251
00:17:38,669 --> 00:17:41,570
You are welcome to look
under any of the furniture...

252
00:17:41,739 --> 00:17:45,231
...because, believe me, you won't find
any porn or cigarettes under there.

253
00:17:46,310 --> 00:17:50,804
Before we look around, let me make sure
I have everything I need up to here.

254
00:17:56,587 --> 00:17:59,112
Why don't I show you the baby's room.

255
00:18:03,961 --> 00:18:05,986
- What are you doing?
- You wouldn't let me in.

256
00:18:06,163 --> 00:18:08,461
- I thought you were in trouble.
- Well, we're not.

257
00:18:08,633 --> 00:18:10,931
But you called me "Bert."

258
00:18:11,569 --> 00:18:13,594
That's our code word for danger.

259
00:18:14,705 --> 00:18:18,698
- We don't have a code word.
- We don't?

260
00:18:18,876 --> 00:18:20,605
We really should.

261
00:18:20,778 --> 00:18:24,714
From now on, "Bert"
will be our code word for danger.

262
00:18:24,882 --> 00:18:27,476
So that was the baby's room.

263
00:18:29,153 --> 00:18:33,590
- What room should we see next?
- Any room that isn't behind this couch.

264
00:18:35,426 --> 00:18:39,260
Some people don't get him,
but I think he's really funny.

265
00:18:46,270 --> 00:18:48,932
I did not care for that.

266
00:18:49,707 --> 00:18:50,935
You have to leave.

267
00:18:51,108 --> 00:18:53,838
You slept with our social worker
and never called her back.

268
00:18:54,011 --> 00:18:56,036
She is still pissed,
so she can't see you.

269
00:18:56,213 --> 00:18:58,044
Okay, okay.

270
00:19:00,951 --> 00:19:03,784
- What?
- I forgot my bat.

271
00:19:06,557 --> 00:19:08,457
Oh, my God.

272
00:19:08,626 --> 00:19:12,824
And for the last time,
we do not want to be friends with you!

273
00:19:15,199 --> 00:19:18,066
And we don't wanna buy your bat!

274
00:19:19,403 --> 00:19:21,166
What are you doing here?

275
00:19:21,338 --> 00:19:24,102
Bert. Bert. Bert. Bert.

276
00:19:27,745 --> 00:19:31,203
- Are you friends with him?
- I can explain.

277
00:19:31,916 --> 00:19:33,474
Joey?

278
00:19:34,218 --> 00:19:36,152
All right. Okay.

279
00:19:40,524 --> 00:19:43,288
You have got some nerve
coming back here.

280
00:19:45,129 --> 00:19:47,757
- I can't believe you never called me.
- Excuse me?

281
00:19:48,265 --> 00:19:52,133
You probably don't even remember
my name. It's Joey, by the way.

282
00:19:52,303 --> 00:19:56,637
And don't bother telling me yours,
because I totally remember it, lady.

283
00:19:59,143 --> 00:20:01,236
I waited weeks for you to call me.

284
00:20:01,412 --> 00:20:03,471
I gave you my number.
You never called me.

285
00:20:03,647 --> 00:20:05,808
Don't try to turn this around on me.

286
00:20:05,983 --> 00:20:10,079
I am not some kind of social work...

287
00:20:10,254 --> 00:20:11,687
...that you can just...

288
00:20:11,856 --> 00:20:13,323
...do.

289
00:20:16,360 --> 00:20:20,763
- I'm pretty sure I gave you my number.
- Really? Think about it. Come on.

290
00:20:20,931 --> 00:20:24,423
You're a beautiful woman.
Smart, funny.

291
00:20:24,602 --> 00:20:27,036
We had a really good time.

292
00:20:28,305 --> 00:20:31,138
If I had your number,
why wouldn't I call you?

293
00:20:31,809 --> 00:20:32,867
I don't know.

294
00:20:35,246 --> 00:20:37,271
Well, maybe I'm wrong. I'm sorry.

295
00:20:37,448 --> 00:20:42,317
Hey, too late for apologies. Okay?
You broke my heart.

296
00:20:42,486 --> 00:20:46,013
You know how many women
I had to sleep with to get over you?

297
00:20:49,093 --> 00:20:51,186
- Joey, wait--
- No!

298
00:20:51,362 --> 00:20:54,331
I waited a long time!
I can't wait anymore.

299
00:20:57,868 --> 00:21:00,769
I'm sorry that you had to see that.
I'm so embarrassed.

300
00:21:00,938 --> 00:21:04,203
- Oh, that's really okay.
- Yeah. We totally understand.

301
00:21:04,375 --> 00:21:07,970
- Dating is hard.
- Boy, you people are nice.

302
00:21:09,713 --> 00:21:11,510
And I've got to say...

303
00:21:11,682 --> 00:21:15,448
...l think you're going to make
excellent parents.

304
00:21:18,956 --> 00:21:20,355
Laura!

305
00:21:27,464 --> 00:21:29,261
We're back.

306
00:21:30,134 --> 00:21:32,398
Are you here to take more money?

307
00:21:32,570 --> 00:21:35,198
Because I think what you're
looking for is an ATM.

308
00:21:35,840 --> 00:21:38,070
No, no, we're here
to give the money back.

309
00:21:38,242 --> 00:21:42,144
Yeah. Because you know what?
It's all about the children.

310
00:21:42,313 --> 00:21:44,941
Although it's also about the wedding.

311
00:21:46,517 --> 00:21:49,077
All right, here. No. Oh, God.

312
00:21:49,253 --> 00:21:52,780
If I haven't said so already,
sir, congratulations.

313
00:21:53,591 --> 00:21:55,115
Oh, wait. Wait.

314
00:21:55,292 --> 00:21:58,159
What if we give half to the charity
and we keep half?

315
00:21:58,329 --> 00:22:02,857
Or, no, like, 75 percent for us
and 25 percent for-- Or, no, like, 90-10.

316
00:22:03,033 --> 00:22:05,228
Okay, you know what? Enough, all right?

317
00:22:05,402 --> 00:22:07,370
I'm stepping in
and putting my foot down.

318
00:22:07,538 --> 00:22:11,201
As your future husband,
I'm gonna make this decision for us.

319
00:22:12,209 --> 00:22:14,677
What do you think we should do?

320
00:22:15,346 --> 00:22:18,679
- It's not your decision anymore.
- What?

321
00:22:18,849 --> 00:22:22,114
On behalf of the children of New York,
I reject your money.

322
00:22:22,853 --> 00:22:25,845
- But we're giving you this.
- And I'm giving it back to you.

323
00:22:26,023 --> 00:22:28,924
Come on. Consider it a contribution.

324
00:22:30,194 --> 00:22:32,719
Well, this is very generous.

325
00:22:32,897 --> 00:22:37,630
Take the check. Have a great wedding
and a wonderful life together.

326
00:22:37,801 --> 00:22:40,793
Sounds good to me. We can save up,
come back in a few years...

327
00:22:40,971 --> 00:22:42,768
...and make an even bigger donation.

328
00:22:42,940 --> 00:22:44,737
And when you do, ask for Brian.

329
00:22:44,909 --> 00:22:46,206
- Oh, is that you?
- No.

330
00:22:51,982 --> 00:22:53,347
Hello?

331
00:22:54,285 --> 00:22:56,082
Oh, hi.

332
00:22:57,054 --> 00:23:00,956
Oh, my God, really?
I can't wait to tell Chandler.

333
00:23:01,125 --> 00:23:02,854
Okay. Goodbye.

334
00:23:03,294 --> 00:23:06,889
- Wrong number?
- That was Laura.

335
00:23:07,064 --> 00:23:10,329
She gave us a great report and
we're officially on the waiting list.

336
00:23:10,501 --> 00:23:13,061
- That's great.
- Now we just wait for a call...

337
00:23:13,237 --> 00:23:16,604
...and someone tells us
there's a baby waiting for us.

338
00:23:28,953 --> 00:23:30,352
Hello?

339
00:23:31,021 --> 00:23:32,682
Have you seen Joey's bat?

340
00:23:38,429 --> 00:23:41,125
Okay. I got a spider.

341
00:23:41,298 --> 00:23:43,459
There were two,
I picked the bigger one.

342
00:23:44,868 --> 00:23:47,302
- Okay.
- Okay.

343
00:23:50,808 --> 00:23:53,003
This feels perfectly normal.

344
00:23:54,144 --> 00:23:56,612
Okay, get on the swing.

345
00:23:58,515 --> 00:24:00,176
Okay.

346
00:24:00,884 --> 00:24:03,114
Okay.

347
00:24:08,892 --> 00:24:10,325
Okay.

348
00:24:18,202 --> 00:24:20,864
- See?
- All right. I can do this.

349
00:24:21,038 --> 00:24:22,938
There you go. Good for you.

350
00:24:23,107 --> 00:24:25,541
You know what?
I'm getting used to this little guy.

351
00:24:25,709 --> 00:24:30,203
- I don't even feel him in here anymore.
- That's because he's on your neck.