1 00:00:04,650 --> 00:00:06,709 - Hey. - Hi. 2 00:00:06,885 --> 00:00:08,375 Pheebs, what's wrong? 3 00:00:08,554 --> 00:00:12,081 I'm just so exhausted from dragging around this huge engagement ring. 4 00:00:12,257 --> 00:00:15,021 - Oh, my God. - Congratulations. 5 00:00:15,193 --> 00:00:18,219 So did he get on one knee? Did he have a speech prepared? 6 00:00:18,397 --> 00:00:20,160 Oh, did he cry? 7 00:00:22,334 --> 00:00:25,497 Yeah, big surprise, I like proposals. 8 00:00:26,238 --> 00:00:30,436 Well, it was really sweet, and, like, the most romantic thing ever. 9 00:00:30,609 --> 00:00:33,908 Here's to Phoebe, who's found the greatest guy in the world. 10 00:00:34,079 --> 00:00:35,239 To Phoebe and-- 11 00:00:35,414 --> 00:00:37,678 I want to say "Mike"? 12 00:00:38,116 --> 00:00:40,607 - To Phoebe and Mike. - Hey. 13 00:00:40,786 --> 00:00:43,448 Thank you. Oh, and I have something for you. 14 00:00:43,622 --> 00:00:47,285 It's my little black book. It's got the numbers of all the guys I've dated. 15 00:00:47,459 --> 00:00:51,862 Oh, Phoebe, that's nice, but you know what? I think I'm okay. 16 00:00:52,030 --> 00:00:54,191 Give it to one of your other single girlfriends. 17 00:00:54,366 --> 00:00:56,630 I would, but you're the last one. 18 00:00:58,470 --> 00:01:00,335 Give me the book! 19 00:01:01,473 --> 00:01:03,338 "Pablo Diaz. 20 00:01:03,508 --> 00:01:05,339 Brady Smith. 21 00:01:06,211 --> 00:01:07,940 Guy in Van"? 22 00:01:08,113 --> 00:01:10,013 Oh, my first love. 23 00:01:11,416 --> 00:01:14,681 What is the red X next to Bob Gremore's name mean? 24 00:01:14,853 --> 00:01:16,787 Dead. 25 00:01:17,990 --> 00:01:21,448 Oh, it's okay. No, he was old. Yeah. 26 00:01:21,627 --> 00:01:25,723 And he lived a full life. He was in the first wave at Omaha Beach. 27 00:01:26,431 --> 00:01:29,298 I should've given you guys my black book when I got married. 28 00:01:29,468 --> 00:01:32,164 Although, it wasn't so much a book as a napkin. 29 00:01:33,772 --> 00:01:35,831 With Janice's phone number on it. 30 00:01:36,875 --> 00:01:39,708 Phoebe, isn't Jethro Tull a band? 31 00:01:43,949 --> 00:01:45,473 Oh, yes, they are. 32 00:02:36,101 --> 00:02:37,693 Hey, honey. 33 00:02:38,503 --> 00:02:40,027 Hey, sweetie. 34 00:02:40,639 --> 00:02:42,300 - Is Monica not here? - No. 35 00:02:42,474 --> 00:02:46,240 Then I'll tell you. My agency was bidding for a big account, and they got it. 36 00:02:46,411 --> 00:02:48,845 - It's my first national commercial. - Cool. 37 00:02:49,014 --> 00:02:52,040 And I don't want to brag, but a lot of the ideas were mine. 38 00:02:52,217 --> 00:02:55,516 Hell, you weren't there. All the ideas were mine. 39 00:02:55,687 --> 00:02:58,952 That's great. Hey, can you cast me in it? 40 00:02:59,658 --> 00:03:02,218 I really don't think you're right for the part. 41 00:03:02,394 --> 00:03:06,091 What do you mean? I can do anything. I'm a chameleon. 42 00:03:07,466 --> 00:03:09,400 I'm old. 43 00:03:11,036 --> 00:03:12,731 I'm tired. 44 00:03:12,904 --> 00:03:17,739 Oh, I am hot. I'm cold. Come on, what can't I do? 45 00:03:18,910 --> 00:03:21,174 First of all, bravo. 46 00:03:22,147 --> 00:03:26,083 But I don't think you're right for this. The part's a stuffy college professor. 47 00:03:26,251 --> 00:03:30,244 I can do that. Hello, I'm your professor. 48 00:03:30,422 --> 00:03:34,916 When I'm not busy thinking of important things, or professing... 49 00:03:36,261 --> 00:03:38,252 ...l like to use-- What's the product? 50 00:03:38,430 --> 00:03:42,093 Software that facilitates inter-business networking e-solutions. 51 00:03:47,139 --> 00:03:48,401 I'm cold. 52 00:03:51,643 --> 00:03:53,167 - Hey. - Hey. 53 00:03:53,345 --> 00:03:55,836 Guess who's a finalist for a huge research grant? 54 00:03:56,014 --> 00:03:58,710 I'll give you a hint. He's looking right at you. 55 00:03:59,384 --> 00:04:02,581 Well, unless it's the creepy guy with his hand up his kilt... 56 00:04:02,754 --> 00:04:05,279 ...I'm gonna say, "Congratulations." 57 00:04:05,457 --> 00:04:09,985 I'm so excited. Apparently, I beat out hundreds of other applicants... 58 00:04:10,162 --> 00:04:12,824 ...including five guys I went to graduate school with. 59 00:04:12,998 --> 00:04:15,967 Not that I'm keeping score, or anything. Five. 60 00:04:16,868 --> 00:04:18,529 - Wow, that's great. - Yeah. 61 00:04:18,703 --> 00:04:21,934 - So tell me about the grant. - Well, okay, it's for $25,000. 62 00:04:22,107 --> 00:04:25,304 And if I get it, I'll be able to complete my field research. 63 00:04:25,477 --> 00:04:29,345 And there will be an article about me in the Paleontology Review. 64 00:04:29,514 --> 00:04:31,812 It'll be the first time my name is in there... 65 00:04:31,983 --> 00:04:34,816 ...without people raising serious questions about my work. 66 00:04:35,854 --> 00:04:39,017 - Are you talking about the Dewer Grant? - Yeah. Why? 67 00:04:39,191 --> 00:04:41,352 Benjamin Hobart is administering that grant. 68 00:04:41,526 --> 00:04:43,653 - Your ex-boyfriend? - Yeah. 69 00:04:43,829 --> 00:04:48,232 So your ex-boyfriend is gonna determine if your new boyfriend gets this grant? 70 00:04:48,400 --> 00:04:51,267 Wow, your new boyfriend is screwed. 71 00:04:51,436 --> 00:04:53,768 No. No, we ended on great terms. 72 00:04:53,939 --> 00:04:56,874 If anything, I think this could help you. You know what? 73 00:04:57,042 --> 00:04:59,909 Why don't we all go out to dinner, and I can introduce you. 74 00:05:00,078 --> 00:05:02,979 - If you think it'd help. - Yeah, absolutely. I'll call him. 75 00:05:03,148 --> 00:05:05,878 Now, is there anything I could do to butter him up? 76 00:05:06,051 --> 00:05:07,575 Anything he really likes? 77 00:05:09,087 --> 00:05:11,248 He does have a pretty serious latex fetish. 78 00:05:11,423 --> 00:05:14,051 We'll see how dinner goes. 79 00:05:17,495 --> 00:05:20,589 - Hey. - Hey, you want to go see a movie? 80 00:05:20,765 --> 00:05:24,360 I told you I had to spend all day clearing out stuff so Mike could move in. 81 00:05:24,536 --> 00:05:26,060 - Oh, right. - Yeah. 82 00:05:26,238 --> 00:05:30,732 Now that I'm here, I might as well help with the cleaning and organizing. 83 00:05:30,909 --> 00:05:32,968 I just happen to have my label maker. 84 00:05:34,813 --> 00:05:37,247 Oh, it's so hard to get rid of stuff. 85 00:05:37,415 --> 00:05:40,680 Did you and Chandler make compromises when you moved in together? 86 00:05:41,052 --> 00:05:42,542 Chandler did. 87 00:05:43,555 --> 00:05:45,989 - What does he want you to give up? - A bunch of stuff. 88 00:05:46,157 --> 00:05:49,388 And the worst one, he wants me to get rid of Gladys. 89 00:05:49,794 --> 00:05:51,785 Who's Gladys? 90 00:05:55,767 --> 00:05:57,632 What a tragic loss. 91 00:05:58,236 --> 00:06:02,673 Yeah, I really hate to give her up. Oh, I know. Oh, you should take her. 92 00:06:07,012 --> 00:06:08,570 I don't know. 93 00:06:08,747 --> 00:06:14,379 - What, you don't like her? - Of course I do. What's not to like? 94 00:06:15,120 --> 00:06:17,486 I'd take her in a minute. 95 00:06:17,656 --> 00:06:19,783 But I think that you're giving up too easy. 96 00:06:19,958 --> 00:06:22,552 Honey, I think that you need to fight for her. 97 00:06:23,361 --> 00:06:25,556 - Really, you think? - Absolutely. 98 00:06:25,730 --> 00:06:28,722 You say to him, "I'm sorry, Mike, I can't live without her. 99 00:06:28,900 --> 00:06:31,061 She means too much to me." 100 00:06:31,369 --> 00:06:34,770 Okay, I'll fight for her. Okay. 101 00:06:34,940 --> 00:06:38,467 Oh, wait. I just realized, if I do that, that means you don't get her. 102 00:06:38,643 --> 00:06:40,611 Damn it, I did not think this through. 103 00:06:44,649 --> 00:06:47,982 Emma, mom's got a snack for you. 104 00:06:53,725 --> 00:06:57,354 You know, every now and then, she might like some barbecue potato chips. 105 00:06:59,264 --> 00:07:00,959 - Hey, guys. - Hey. 106 00:07:01,132 --> 00:07:02,463 - Hi. - Hey, baby. 107 00:07:02,634 --> 00:07:04,499 Oh, any word on casting yet? 108 00:07:04,669 --> 00:07:07,832 - I told you, you're not right for the part. - What do you mean? 109 00:07:08,006 --> 00:07:12,170 Rach, don't I seem like a professor you'd buy some kind of e-crap from? 110 00:07:13,244 --> 00:07:16,839 I'm sorry, this sounds like something I'm never gonna be interested in. 111 00:07:17,549 --> 00:07:21,918 Look, come on, please? It's not like I'm asking you for some crazy favor. 112 00:07:22,087 --> 00:07:24,954 This is what I do for a living. I am a professional actor. 113 00:07:25,123 --> 00:07:27,091 Man, I'm two hours late for work. 114 00:07:28,960 --> 00:07:32,225 Here's my reel. It's got all the commercials that I've been in. 115 00:07:32,397 --> 00:07:34,024 - Joe-- - Just watch it. 116 00:07:34,199 --> 00:07:36,997 If you don't like it, don't pass it on to your bosses. 117 00:07:37,168 --> 00:07:40,069 - Fine. - Thank you. 118 00:07:44,042 --> 00:07:46,840 - Work, Joe. - Damn it. 119 00:07:50,048 --> 00:07:52,539 - What am I gonna do now? - Just pass the tape along. 120 00:07:52,717 --> 00:07:54,548 He's not right for the part. 121 00:07:54,719 --> 00:07:57,187 If I suggest him, my bosses will think I'm an idiot. 122 00:07:57,355 --> 00:07:59,983 And that's something they should learn on their own. 123 00:08:00,158 --> 00:08:02,388 Just tell Joey that you watched the tape... 124 00:08:02,560 --> 00:08:04,551 ...and you liked it, but your bosses didn't. 125 00:08:04,729 --> 00:08:07,163 Then you're the good guy, and they're the bad guy. 126 00:08:07,332 --> 00:08:10,233 That's good. I liked it, they didn't. 127 00:08:12,103 --> 00:08:14,765 Joey, for God's sake, go to work. 128 00:08:20,178 --> 00:08:23,011 I can't believe I'm about to meet Benjamin Hobart. 129 00:08:23,181 --> 00:08:25,615 I've always thought of him as someone I'd invite... 130 00:08:25,784 --> 00:08:28,275 ...to my fantasy dinner party. 131 00:08:29,220 --> 00:08:32,883 Do you think there's any chance he'll bring Christie Brinkley or C-3PO? 132 00:08:34,492 --> 00:08:37,120 Sorry, it looks like it's just him. 133 00:08:38,897 --> 00:08:40,364 Charlie. 134 00:08:42,700 --> 00:08:46,500 My God, you look absolutely stunning. 135 00:08:46,671 --> 00:08:49,799 Well, I am having a good hair day. 136 00:08:50,608 --> 00:08:54,408 - It's so good to see you. - Oh, you too. 137 00:08:58,016 --> 00:08:59,381 I'm okay. 138 00:09:00,251 --> 00:09:03,584 I'm sorry. Ross Geller, Benjamin Hobart. 139 00:09:03,755 --> 00:09:06,883 It's an honor to meet you. I can't tell you how long... 140 00:09:07,058 --> 00:09:11,995 ...I've been an admirer of your work. I mean, that Nobel Prize. 141 00:09:13,665 --> 00:09:17,795 I mean, I have to tell you that you're one of the reasons I got into the field. 142 00:09:18,369 --> 00:09:19,859 Well, likewise. 143 00:09:21,206 --> 00:09:24,004 Not likewise. I'd never heard of you until this morning. 144 00:09:24,175 --> 00:09:25,767 But it's nice to be nice. 145 00:09:27,846 --> 00:09:31,475 - Shall we? - Yeah. Thank you. 146 00:09:34,052 --> 00:09:37,544 I can't believe that you chose this restaurant. 147 00:09:37,722 --> 00:09:41,783 - Do you remember the night? - Oh, my God. I completely forgot. 148 00:09:41,960 --> 00:09:47,262 Oh, my God, I can't believe they let us back in this place. 149 00:09:54,272 --> 00:09:56,604 You weren't there. 150 00:09:57,275 --> 00:10:00,472 No, but, you know, it's just a funny image. 151 00:10:00,645 --> 00:10:06,106 You know, the two of you in this restaurant with the.... 152 00:10:07,752 --> 00:10:12,849 Ross, why don't you tell Benji about your proposal while I go to the ladies' room. 153 00:10:14,759 --> 00:10:16,420 So tell me about it. 154 00:10:16,594 --> 00:10:21,031 Okay. Well, I would like to do a dig in the Painted Desert. 155 00:10:21,199 --> 00:10:24,396 There are still several areas that haven't been fully excavated. 156 00:10:24,569 --> 00:10:25,900 - Break up with Charlie. - What? 157 00:10:26,070 --> 00:10:27,435 What? 158 00:10:28,540 --> 00:10:32,670 Did you just say, "Break up with Charlie"? 159 00:10:33,711 --> 00:10:39,149 Well, yes and no. Yes, I did say it. And no, I didn't not say it. 160 00:10:40,185 --> 00:10:44,087 - Kind of inappropriate, don't you think? - Listen, I'm sorry. 161 00:10:44,255 --> 00:10:47,850 I just haven't seen her for so long, all these feelings are rushing back. 162 00:10:48,026 --> 00:10:50,358 I'm starting to realize how much I've missed her. 163 00:10:50,528 --> 00:10:52,928 And I'm gonna need you to break up with her. 164 00:10:55,066 --> 00:10:57,728 - Are you serious? - If you say, yes, then I'm serious. 165 00:10:57,902 --> 00:11:00,200 If you say, no, then I'm joking. 166 00:11:01,539 --> 00:11:03,439 - No. - Joking it is. 167 00:11:07,579 --> 00:11:10,446 - Hi, sorry I'm late. - Hey, how'd it go with Mike? 168 00:11:10,615 --> 00:11:14,551 - Is he gonna let you keep the painting? - No, he really hates it. 169 00:11:14,719 --> 00:11:17,620 But he's gonna let me keep my box of human hair. 170 00:11:18,890 --> 00:11:24,260 So you gotta pick your battles. But the good news is, Gladys is yours. 171 00:11:26,030 --> 00:11:28,521 Wow, what's the bad news? 172 00:11:28,900 --> 00:11:32,165 - Who's Gladys? - Oh, she's that work of art I made. 173 00:11:32,337 --> 00:11:35,067 You know, with the woman coming out of the frame. 174 00:11:35,940 --> 00:11:39,706 And Monica gets to keep her? 175 00:11:39,877 --> 00:11:43,074 In her house? I am so jealous. 176 00:11:45,083 --> 00:11:47,051 I didn't know you wanted her too. 177 00:11:49,187 --> 00:11:52,623 Well, I mean, sure, of course. 178 00:11:53,124 --> 00:11:55,285 But you already gave that to Monica, so.... 179 00:11:55,460 --> 00:11:59,260 - You know, I would give her up for you. - No, I couldn't let you do that. 180 00:11:59,430 --> 00:12:01,762 - No, but I want to. - But I don't want you to. 181 00:12:01,933 --> 00:12:05,869 - But I insist. - But I insist harder. 182 00:12:07,672 --> 00:12:09,970 Girls. Girls. Stop. Okay, we'll flip a coin. 183 00:12:10,141 --> 00:12:13,338 Heads, she's Rachel's. Tails, she's Monica's. 184 00:12:15,780 --> 00:12:19,614 - Tails. Monica, she's yours. - No, that landed in your food. 185 00:12:20,652 --> 00:12:24,748 No, no, that's okay. You won fair and square. I'm so sad. 186 00:12:27,158 --> 00:12:31,254 Then the little red squirrel took all of his acorns... 187 00:12:31,429 --> 00:12:35,422 ...and put them in his little satchel and set off for-- 188 00:12:36,467 --> 00:12:39,493 Okay. Someone's getting a little fussy. I think it's time for bed. 189 00:12:40,605 --> 00:12:42,539 Where's the little red squirrel going? 190 00:12:47,345 --> 00:12:49,040 Hey, Joe? 191 00:12:53,718 --> 00:12:55,777 Oh, that's so sweet. 192 00:12:57,722 --> 00:12:59,019 - What's up? - Bad news. 193 00:12:59,190 --> 00:13:04,025 I watched the tape and passed it along to my bosses and they weren't interested. 194 00:13:05,196 --> 00:13:07,858 I'm sorry, man. 195 00:13:09,067 --> 00:13:13,231 - But you watched the tape? - Yeah, I liked it. 196 00:13:14,405 --> 00:13:20,173 But my bosses didn't go for it. Stupid sons of bitches. 197 00:13:24,515 --> 00:13:29,111 - You didn't watch the tape. - What? Of course I did. 198 00:13:29,287 --> 00:13:32,120 Look, it's one thing not to cast me, but to lie to me? 199 00:13:32,290 --> 00:13:35,418 - I'm not lying to you. I watched it. - You lied again. 200 00:13:35,593 --> 00:13:38,721 - I watched it. - Keep going, Pinocchio. 201 00:13:39,931 --> 00:13:41,796 - I did. - No, you didn't. 202 00:13:41,966 --> 00:13:44,025 I'm telling you, I watched the tape. 203 00:13:46,037 --> 00:13:48,733 - Did you watch the tape? - No. 204 00:13:53,311 --> 00:13:57,077 Hi. Look, I realize only one of us can get this grant. 205 00:13:57,248 --> 00:14:00,547 And I just wanted to wish both of you the best of luck. 206 00:14:00,718 --> 00:14:02,709 Are you crossing your fingers? 207 00:14:03,988 --> 00:14:09,949 What, this? No. This-- That's just the result of a childhood injury. 208 00:14:10,828 --> 00:14:13,262 I'm cured! 209 00:14:15,633 --> 00:14:16,725 Good morning, everybody. 210 00:14:16,901 --> 00:14:19,426 If you go ahead and take your seats we can get started. 211 00:14:19,804 --> 00:14:22,364 Actually, Dr. Hobart, can I have a word with you? 212 00:14:22,540 --> 00:14:24,405 And you are? 213 00:14:25,877 --> 00:14:28,004 - Ross. - I know. I'm kidding. 214 00:14:30,748 --> 00:14:32,978 Listen, I just want to say, last night-- 215 00:14:33,151 --> 00:14:35,210 Dinner was a little awkward. 216 00:14:35,386 --> 00:14:38,549 - I just wanna make sure we're okay. - Oh, yeah. Absolutely. 217 00:14:38,723 --> 00:14:41,920 - You didn't tell Charlie what I said, did you? - Oh, no. Of course not. 218 00:14:42,293 --> 00:14:47,356 Well, thank you. I want you to know, I respect your decision not to give her up. 219 00:14:47,532 --> 00:14:50,160 It was the biggest mistake I ever made in my whole life. 220 00:14:50,334 --> 00:14:53,929 Well, that and tattooing her name on my shoulder... 221 00:14:54,572 --> 00:14:57,132 ...last night stupidly. 222 00:14:58,276 --> 00:14:59,265 Seriously? 223 00:14:59,444 --> 00:15:03,005 My Nobel Prize was not for moving on. 224 00:15:04,582 --> 00:15:07,278 - So no hard feelings? - None at all. Good luck today. 225 00:15:07,452 --> 00:15:09,113 - Thank you. - Okay. 226 00:15:09,287 --> 00:15:14,054 All right. The selection committee has chosen the three of you as our finalists. 227 00:15:14,225 --> 00:15:19,162 The ultimate decision will be based on the answers you give to the questions I ask. 228 00:15:19,330 --> 00:15:21,594 We're gonna go ahead and start with Dr. Li. 229 00:15:21,766 --> 00:15:25,930 You claim the field is too reliant on the Linnaean taxonomic system. 230 00:15:26,103 --> 00:15:28,264 How do you propose to correct this problem? 231 00:15:28,439 --> 00:15:31,567 Well, I believe that the answers lie in the osteological evidence. 232 00:15:31,742 --> 00:15:33,607 - I plan to begin there. - Interesting. 233 00:15:34,045 --> 00:15:35,774 I guess. 234 00:15:36,747 --> 00:15:40,683 Dr. Biely, your proposal includes some fieldwork. Where might that take place? 235 00:15:40,852 --> 00:15:43,548 Primarily in the Pierre Shale region of South Dakota. 236 00:15:43,721 --> 00:15:48,158 Certainly. Very well. And Dr. Geller, when is my birthday? 237 00:15:54,465 --> 00:15:56,365 What? I-- 238 00:15:58,369 --> 00:16:00,530 Care to venture a guess? 239 00:16:03,040 --> 00:16:07,067 - May 12? - That's not even kind of close. 240 00:16:08,079 --> 00:16:10,513 Dr. Li, how many graduate students will you need? 241 00:16:10,681 --> 00:16:12,615 - Half a dozen. - I see. And Dr. Biely? 242 00:16:12,783 --> 00:16:15,081 Three for excavation, and two for analysis. 243 00:16:15,253 --> 00:16:19,314 Certainly. Dr. Geller, which 1965 Shirelles hit... 244 00:16:19,490 --> 00:16:22,516 ...was later covered by a popular British lnvasion band? 245 00:16:26,197 --> 00:16:28,688 What? I need six graduate students. 246 00:16:28,866 --> 00:16:32,666 No, I'm sorry. We were looking for "Baby It's You." 247 00:16:32,837 --> 00:16:34,202 "Baby It's You." 248 00:16:35,840 --> 00:16:38,138 What? Wait just a minute. 249 00:16:38,309 --> 00:16:41,472 None of my questions have anything to do with paleontology. 250 00:16:41,646 --> 00:16:44,114 You're right, I apologize. Scratch the last question. 251 00:16:44,282 --> 00:16:46,512 Spell "Boscodictiasaur." 252 00:16:48,786 --> 00:16:52,119 I've never heard of a "Boscodictiasaur." 253 00:16:52,290 --> 00:16:54,622 Yeah, I just made it up. Spell it. 254 00:16:57,461 --> 00:17:00,919 - Okay. B-O-- - No, it starts with a silent M. 255 00:17:01,098 --> 00:17:03,328 Oh, come on! 256 00:17:09,674 --> 00:17:13,166 I can't believe Joey. I hate being called a liar. 257 00:17:13,344 --> 00:17:14,777 But you are a liar. 258 00:17:16,113 --> 00:17:18,081 What did I just say? 259 00:17:19,450 --> 00:17:20,747 - Are you still here? - Yes. 260 00:17:20,918 --> 00:17:25,719 And I'm not just hurt, I'm insulted. When I tell somebody I did something-- 261 00:17:25,890 --> 00:17:29,724 Okay, hold on, let me just stop you right there, okay? First, you lied. Right? 262 00:17:29,894 --> 00:17:32,454 Then you lied about lying, okay? 263 00:17:32,630 --> 00:17:35,531 Then you lied about lying about lying, okay? 264 00:17:35,700 --> 00:17:41,104 So before you lie about lying about lying about lying about lying.... 265 00:17:43,107 --> 00:17:44,972 Stop lying. 266 00:17:45,142 --> 00:17:47,770 Why are you so sure I didn't watch this tape? 267 00:17:47,945 --> 00:17:50,038 You wanna know why? You wanna know why? 268 00:17:50,581 --> 00:17:52,481 Well, this is going well. 269 00:17:53,918 --> 00:17:55,613 Here's how I know you didn't watch. 270 00:17:55,786 --> 00:18:00,655 If you had seen what was on this tape, believe me, you'd have some comments. 271 00:18:00,825 --> 00:18:03,623 All right, remember, I got paid a lot of money for this... 272 00:18:03,794 --> 00:18:05,989 ...and it only aired in Japan. 273 00:18:06,897 --> 00:18:08,592 Ichiban. 274 00:18:09,967 --> 00:18:12,128 Ichiban, lipstick for men. 275 00:18:24,915 --> 00:18:27,907 Ichiban, lipstick for men. 276 00:18:31,656 --> 00:18:34,090 And that's how I know you didn't watch the tape. 277 00:18:37,128 --> 00:18:39,528 He really is a chameleon. 278 00:18:46,470 --> 00:18:50,668 Well, Gladys, say hello to your new home. 279 00:18:53,844 --> 00:18:56,506 - Oh, my. - Wow. 280 00:18:56,681 --> 00:18:59,912 Oh, she is so nice and big. 281 00:19:01,786 --> 00:19:07,952 Oh, Monica, where are you going to display Gladys, oh, so proudly? 282 00:19:08,993 --> 00:19:13,225 - I haven't really settled on a spot yet. - How about right above the TV? 283 00:19:13,431 --> 00:19:17,891 That way, it will be the first thing that you see when you walk in the door. 284 00:19:19,036 --> 00:19:22,563 Yeah, yeah, and you can get rid of that French poster. 285 00:19:22,740 --> 00:19:24,674 - I like that poster. - Really? 286 00:19:25,142 --> 00:19:27,303 It doesn't have anything coming out of it. 287 00:19:28,345 --> 00:19:30,813 Or maybe there's someplace for her in your bedroom? 288 00:19:30,981 --> 00:19:34,747 - There's nothing above your bed. - Are you still here? 289 00:19:38,355 --> 00:19:41,586 Stupid Nobel Prize winner. 290 00:19:47,932 --> 00:19:49,763 Oh, hi. Hello. 291 00:19:49,934 --> 00:19:54,371 Have you come to ask me some more paleontology-related questions? 292 00:19:54,538 --> 00:19:58,668 Your grandmother's nickname, perhaps? Ann-Margret's pant size? 293 00:20:01,078 --> 00:20:05,708 I've come here to apologize. I think I may have let my feelings... 294 00:20:05,883 --> 00:20:08,545 ...for Charlie interfere with the interview process. 295 00:20:08,719 --> 00:20:10,812 No. Stop. 296 00:20:11,522 --> 00:20:14,457 Anyway, I decided to offer you the grant. 297 00:20:16,127 --> 00:20:20,655 - Really? - There is just one small stipulation. 298 00:20:21,098 --> 00:20:24,966 - I have to break up with Charlie? - Hey, you got one right. 299 00:20:26,570 --> 00:20:30,904 - You're crazy. - Crazy or romantic? 300 00:20:31,475 --> 00:20:32,737 Crazy. 301 00:20:35,246 --> 00:20:36,941 - Or? - Get out! 302 00:20:43,888 --> 00:20:44,980 Oh, my God. 303 00:20:47,091 --> 00:20:51,460 - What? - Joey, what is this thing doing here? 304 00:20:51,629 --> 00:20:56,430 I got her from Monica. She sold it to me for a very reasonable price. 305 00:20:56,600 --> 00:21:00,229 - Joey, we're not keeping this. - But it's an original Buffay. 306 00:21:03,407 --> 00:21:06,137 All right, fine. You can keep it. 307 00:21:06,310 --> 00:21:08,676 As long as you don't mind that she's haunted. 308 00:21:08,846 --> 00:21:10,370 Hey, what? What? 309 00:21:10,781 --> 00:21:15,309 Well, legend has it, Joey, that she comes alive when you're asleep. 310 00:21:17,621 --> 00:21:20,613 She climbs out of the frame... 311 00:21:20,791 --> 00:21:25,091 ...and then drags her half-a-body across the floor... 312 00:21:25,262 --> 00:21:27,093 ...just looking for legs to steal. 313 00:21:28,599 --> 00:21:30,897 And then with her one good hand... 314 00:21:31,068 --> 00:21:35,027 ...she slowly reaches up... 315 00:21:35,206 --> 00:21:37,436 ...and turns your doorknob. 316 00:21:37,608 --> 00:21:41,408 Get that legless witch out of here! 317 00:21:46,851 --> 00:21:50,014 - Hey, I sold that to Joey. - Yeah, well, I told him it's haunted. 318 00:21:50,187 --> 00:21:53,020 - Two can play at this game. - Too late. You can't give it back. 319 00:21:53,190 --> 00:21:55,385 - Oh, yes, I can. - No, you can't, she's yours. 320 00:21:55,559 --> 00:21:56,958 - She's yours. - She's yours. 321 00:21:57,127 --> 00:21:59,527 - She's yours. - Hey. 322 00:22:01,065 --> 00:22:02,589 - She's mine. - She's mine. 323 00:22:02,766 --> 00:22:04,631 - She's mine. - She's mine. 324 00:22:04,802 --> 00:22:08,033 You guys, you don't have to fight over her anymore. 325 00:22:08,439 --> 00:22:11,636 Whoever doesn't get Gladys, gets Glynnis. 326 00:22:19,850 --> 00:22:22,011 - I want Gladys. - She's mine. 327 00:22:22,186 --> 00:22:24,177 - She's mine. - She's mine. 328 00:22:31,962 --> 00:22:33,589 No, no. You don't get to do that. 329 00:22:33,764 --> 00:22:37,063 I know. Look, I'm sorry I didn't give them your tape. 330 00:22:37,234 --> 00:22:41,261 And I promise next time to submit you, whether I think you're right or not. 331 00:22:41,438 --> 00:22:44,430 That's not the point, Chandler. The point is that you lied. 332 00:22:44,608 --> 00:22:49,204 I know. You're right. What's it gonna take for you to forgive me? 333 00:22:49,380 --> 00:22:50,438 Oh, my God. 334 00:22:54,718 --> 00:22:56,777 Excellent. 335 00:22:57,721 --> 00:23:00,155 Now what do you say? 336 00:23:00,324 --> 00:23:02,519 Lying is wrong. 337 00:23:02,693 --> 00:23:05,184 And? And? 338 00:23:06,964 --> 00:23:09,728 I'm a pretty little girl. 339 00:23:11,402 --> 00:23:12,835 I knew it. 340 00:23:20,477 --> 00:23:23,810 Your ex-boyfriend is insane. 341 00:23:24,515 --> 00:23:26,346 - He is a character. - No, no, no. 342 00:23:26,517 --> 00:23:29,611 Charles Nelson Reilly is a character. 343 00:23:30,187 --> 00:23:32,655 - Who? - Charles Nelson Reilly. 344 00:23:32,823 --> 00:23:35,951 The Ghost and Mrs. Muir? Match Game? 345 00:23:37,594 --> 00:23:39,960 Were you never sick as a child? 346 00:23:40,731 --> 00:23:43,928 - Whatever. Did you get the grant? - No. And you wanna know why? 347 00:23:44,101 --> 00:23:47,366 Because your ex-boyfriend is still in love with you. 348 00:23:47,538 --> 00:23:48,562 - What? - Yeah. 349 00:23:48,739 --> 00:23:51,105 He refused me because I wouldn't give you up. 350 00:23:51,275 --> 00:23:54,540 Benji isn't in love with me. I mean, he broke up with me. 351 00:23:54,712 --> 00:23:59,046 - And besides, he's a very ethical man. - Really? 352 00:23:59,783 --> 00:24:02,547 Is it ethical to ask someone in a grant review: 353 00:24:02,720 --> 00:24:04,585 "Who was the voice of Underdog?" 354 00:24:05,422 --> 00:24:06,980 I'm sure he was just joking. 355 00:24:07,157 --> 00:24:09,352 If you don't believe me, let's go talk to him. 356 00:24:09,526 --> 00:24:12,586 I'm telling you, he didn't ask me one paleontological question. 357 00:24:12,763 --> 00:24:15,698 - Seriously? - Oh, I'm sorry. No, he did ask me one: 358 00:24:15,866 --> 00:24:18,198 "How do you spell Boscodictiasaur?" 359 00:24:18,369 --> 00:24:21,896 Well, if it's like the Lake Mbosco in Congo, then M-B-O-- 360 00:24:22,072 --> 00:24:23,232 Damn it. 361 00:24:26,877 --> 00:24:30,108 Dr. Geller. Charlie, what are you doing here? 362 00:24:30,280 --> 00:24:32,180 I want you to tell her everything. 363 00:24:32,349 --> 00:24:36,012 About the deal you tried to make with me, about the crazy questions you-- 364 00:24:36,353 --> 00:24:41,484 Wally Cox. That's the voice of Underdog. 365 00:24:42,292 --> 00:24:44,385 Like I tried to tell you in the interview... 366 00:24:44,561 --> 00:24:48,497 ...this grant is not based on your knowledge of pretty useless trivia. 367 00:24:48,665 --> 00:24:53,625 No, don't do that. I want you to look her in the eyes and tell her the truth. 368 00:24:54,872 --> 00:24:55,964 Benji? 369 00:24:57,174 --> 00:25:02,009 All right. It's true. I behaved horribly, but it's only because I still love you. 370 00:25:02,179 --> 00:25:05,114 And I would do anything to have you back in my life. 371 00:25:05,282 --> 00:25:07,944 Too little, too late, Benji. 372 00:25:09,019 --> 00:25:13,149 - I can't believe this. - I never should've broken up with you. 373 00:25:13,323 --> 00:25:18,351 I think about you all the time. Do you ever still think about me? 374 00:25:18,529 --> 00:25:20,019 No. 375 00:25:20,898 --> 00:25:23,230 - Yes. - What? 376 00:25:24,034 --> 00:25:27,993 I don't know what to say, Benji. This is all so... 377 00:25:28,172 --> 00:25:30,231 ...romantic. 378 00:25:30,741 --> 00:25:32,265 Or? 379 00:25:35,012 --> 00:25:37,207 I know I may be way out of bounds here... 380 00:25:37,381 --> 00:25:40,839 ...but is there any chance you would take me back? 381 00:25:43,387 --> 00:25:45,514 Maybe. 382 00:25:45,689 --> 00:25:49,591 Sweetie, this conversation is starting to make me a little uncomfortable. 383 00:25:51,261 --> 00:25:55,027 Oh, God. I am so sorry, but-- 384 00:25:55,199 --> 00:25:59,966 I mean, there's so much history between us, you know? 385 00:26:00,170 --> 00:26:02,638 I'm sorry too. 386 00:26:10,714 --> 00:26:14,411 - I love you. - I love you too. 387 00:26:16,386 --> 00:26:19,446 Okay, that's it, we are seeing other people. 388 00:26:39,209 --> 00:26:40,198 Gladys? 389 00:26:47,251 --> 00:26:51,017 For the third time this week. Man, this does not get old. 390 00:26:52,489 --> 00:26:56,323 - You're mean! - Oh, don't be such a baby. Please.